The Blog of a mostly United Kingdom
by Froggiecool
Summary: America and one of Britain's counties have set him up a blog. Being the gentleman he is, he is going to use it. Of course, that is if nobody else gets in. Oh, and if you want a scone, he's very happy to make you one! Now with some form of vague plot! (Yes, it's rather odd)
1. Chapter 1

America broke into my house this morning, and, with the help of one of my counties, forcibly set this up. I am not an ungrateful sod like him, so I intend to use it. However, I have far more important thigs to do than this, so it may not be as... Frequent... As America's may be.

I can imagine it will only be stupid Americans reading this, so I may as will teach you idiots something. Should you wish to know anything, ask me, so that I may enlighten you. With your interesting geography, this could be amusing...

By the way, if either France or America is reading this... Bugger off. You too, Cam.

_(I let you use my account, Daddy. Be more grateful.)_

Stop that!

Anyway, a pleasure to meet you;

A. Kirkland.

* * *

My details:

Name: United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, or Britain to be less formal. Also, I am known as Arthur Kirkland.

Age: 23

Family: I have four brothers, one of which has forcibly left the family. This does not include the 235 areas of the (ex) British Empire, which does include my dependancies, or my 48 Ceremonial counties (those of my four true brothers do not belong diectly to me). I actually have 82 counties, but some of these are sub-counties of the Ceremonial ones, hence making them grandchildren. This is one of those matters which a request would have to be made for an explination.

Height: 5'9''

Weight: N/A

Favourite food: Fish and Chips... Or maybe curry?

Other information: I do not wish to share anythng else at this moment in time.


	2. Post 2 the name is Britain Not Bond

Good afternoon,

Seeing as parliament is not currently in session, I have some free time; although the younger royals are causing trouble enough. Most people seem more amused than angry, so maybe damage limitation policies do not yet need to come into force. Trying to avoid a certain French-speaking nation (no names mentioned), I decided to see what was happening here. I've already told him the Olympics were as bloody fair as they could be.

…

And certainly not the 'gayest show on earth'.

_Hi Britain!_

Ah! Flying Mint Bunny! Did you come to say hello?

_It's so nice to see you, Britain!_

And you. Would you care to join me to reply to these messages?

_Okay!_

We have visitors from Finland, Norway, Israel, Poland, the Philippines, the UK and, of course, the US. And… Canada?

_People in the Philippines have internet? And where's Canada? Do people live there?_

Of course those in the Philippines has internet.

…

Canada… Why does that ring a bell?

_It does sound familiar… Let's finish this, then get those scones from the oven!_

Of course. Come here.

* * *

**mrsdalliswinston**

**Yes! You have one now, too! :D So, this year my best friend convinced me to come to England with her (I've alway wanted to go but I hate flying with a passion), is there anything you recommend we do whilst there?**

Hello,

I do hope you enjoy my country. The fear of flying is quite common. More people die in car accidents, however.

The Tower of London is always popular, although quite expensive. The Britain at War Museum in London is very good, if you have interest in the second world war. As with most of the London museums, it is free. The science and natural history museums are also quite informative. Then there's Victoria and Albert… Outside of London, you can find many old country houses, such as Blickling Hall, or old universities, which are open to the public.

_Britain, she's American. She's not interested in your boring museums and old houses._

Flying Mint Bunny! She had better bloody like museums if she's coming here.

_We have other things, too… Harrods, London Eye…_

London Dungeons, Alton Towers…

_Lego Land! She can go to Lego land!_

That's for children. Anyhow, I hope you enjoy your trip to my country.

_YEAH! I'll get Uni to come and find you!_

_(The author adds that she doesn't know everything – a lot of the best places you just happen upon.)_

Good bye

_BYE!_

**Quiet Harmony-chan**

**-rolls eyes- You do realize that not all Americans are idiots? I'm a very smart and educated person just so you know. Anyway! Just to piss you off I would like to say that Sea land IS a real country!**

Well, if you think you're so bloody clever, prove it. And that applies to the rest of you.

_Play nice, Britain!_

He didn't invade the meeting again did he? That boy has no sense of respect for his elders. Just because Germany visited him that one time… He is NOT a country – don't encourage him. That's a bloody awful idea, and you damn well know it.

It's this sort of thing that makes you idiots in the first instance.

**Rizu Roraito**

**Hello! To start off... That was a bit mean (about the American comment) however I do really like the idea of you starting a blog, and I just wanted to comment on how it's great, ha ha. Good luck on it. :D**

Hello to you, too,

_HI!_

I'll change my mind when somebody proves me otherwise. Until then, I stand by my statement. I suppose you want me to apologise for my viewpoint? Fine then. Here is your bloody apology.

_Britain… *sigh* that translates as he's very sorry, but too stubborn to say it._

Thank you for the compliments, however. It's not my idea. Personally, I feel this time would be better spent on my embroidery.

_Britain, I know you'd eat up France instead._

Flying Mint Bunny! How dare you suggest such things? He's a bloody git!

_Oops. Did I say that out loud?_

_…_

_Next question!_

I'm not finished with you yet!

**euphemialibritannia221**

**Lord Kirkland/Sir Britain! I am so excited to have finally met you. It's an honor to meet the son of Lady Britannia. From an alternate history in another anime series, I am Euphemia li Britannia, Third Princess of Holy Britannia Empire. I have come to ask questions about you, Sir Britain. Are you okay with this? Just a little hello and a intro of myself. *smiles happily with a giggle***

**Thanks to the writer for creating such a blog. I just started a little joke about bringing Code Geass into this(due to British history and all). Sorry about that. I will add this as a favorite immediately.**

**(o)/ *waves goodbye*( I'll be back)**

Hum.

Well, hello there. You are welcome. And please, you may just call me 'Britain'. Alternative history, you say? There are very many of them.

I believe the purpose of this is to ask questions.

_Heya! _

_You'd better not start stalking Britain, otherwise I'll set Captain Hook on you!_

That isn't very nice. She's been far more polite than the others.

_Hum… *suspicious glare* I'm watching you…  
And you WERE the one who call them stupid._

_(The author states you're welcome to, but I don't have a clue what you're talking about!)_

Good bye!

_That makes you sound even more suspicious… _

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**  
**Hi there Englend! first of all my english is really bad...so please don't get mad at me...**  
**It is very nice that you have now a blog :) there are many more blogs of countries now...Do you read some of them? if you do then which blogs you read?**  
**oh and I neve tasted English food before so I will be more than happy if you will cook me some of your food...I'm sure it isn't as bad as everyone say...nothing wrong can happen by eating it...right? RIGHT?!**  
**well I'm off :) bye-bye**  
**LOVE YOU**  
**P.S- I'm learning black magic so I wander if you can give me some tips..pretty please?**

Hello,

I will keep that in mind. For the record, it's spelt 'England'. It's still better than America's.

That is true. I have read many of the blogs. America makes me read his, and that of some other country I can't think of at this moment… I have read Norway's, although it is mainly him whining. I intend to make Spain's life… Interesting ;). And I always like to know where Russia is.

_Yes, because when he's busy with his Baltics, he can't mess around with your spells, right?_

Quite…

Of course you can have some food! What would you like – I have scones, fish and chips, curry, tea and biscuits… What would you like? And of course nothing happens if you eat it.

_Just be sure to have a bucket ready!_

Wonder, not 'wander', love.  
Make sure to have lots of chalk. If you were to run out in the middle of drawing your pentagram, things will go badly. Always use black for demon summoning, although any colour will do for other creatures. And, remember to be properly dressed for the act.

Good bye.

_(The author would like to note that she does not practice black magic – this is taken from various encyclopaedias on mythology and fictional stories)_

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**My British dude finally gotten his own blog and let the madness begin. Hey. Hey. Hey Iggy. Be careful and hope that America doesn't hack you blog. Then that will suck my dude. **

**All hell is going to break lose my British friend. I'm going to love this blog and love how cute you get when angry.**

Do not call me Iggy. If you will insist on Japanese, the full name would be preferable. If he hacks my blog, I will hack his right back. I DID invent the internet, after all. Or rather, gave it to you.

_Thank you. You just sent him into a sulk!_

I am not sulking, and a gentleman does not get angry. And hell does not break loose… Unless you are using sorcery, of course.

_Yeah right._

**CrossGrave **

**Oh Arthur!**

**I love you, my beautiful country!**

**I sound like a stalker...**

**But I'm English.**

**Derp.**

Hello,

_I hope you are referring to the land itself, otherwise we might have to destroy you… Love you!_

Yes, you sound like a stalker. As long as you are not going to imitate Belarus, all is well.

Goodbye

_Bye! And I'm watching you, too!_

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**Toni: HOLY SH*T! Hey Iggy-land! **  
**London: Hi, nii-chan...please ignore her.**  
**Toni: Y U ignore me? I'm a PASSIONATE Anglophile!**  
**London: Believe me, I know...**  
**Toni: America bugs the crap out of me too!**  
**London: What- why-?**  
**Toni: Why do you bloody think?**  
**London: Oh, yeah, right...he stalks your nii-chan, huh?**  
**Toni: Ja, he does. It's not awesome!**  
**London: ...she's Prussian...**  
**Toni: AND BRITISH! **  
**London: yes, I don't even know about this one...**  
**Toni: I'm sorry! I just ate a big bar of chocolate, England! You probably think I'm a weirdo now! *emo corner* Oh and I love your marshmallow chant. I did it at camp this year with all the other Hetalia fans **  
**London: You have some weird friends...**  
**Toni: Ja, I do. **  
**London: Anyway, nii-chan, it's cool that you've got a blog now! **  
**Toni: Bring on the fire...bring on the hell...set everything ablaze so that no trace remains! **  
**London: Shut it now, Toni, or I won't give you tickets to the Doctor Who premier in New York City.**  
**Toni: ...**  
**London: That will work for a few weeks. **  
**Toni: ...can you sneak me into Top Gear UK filming? *puppy dog eyes* **  
**London: I'd have to ask around a bit, but I could try.**  
**Toni: Yay! **  
**London: Anyway, it's good to see you, nii-chan. Can we have some scones when you get back home? **  
**Toni: I don't live with you! **  
**London: I know you don't. Just bring some, ok nii-chan?**  
**Toni: Bring me some too! Mm, scones... **

**Peace, Love, and AWESOME! **

**Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland (London and Toni)**

Ah, London. And Toni, my name is Britain.

Marshmallow chant? Yes, that is one of my better pieces. It was worth it to see the look on the bloody git's face.

No, I cannot sneak you in. You can pay like everyone else.

Of course we can have scones. I have a new recipe for cheese scones that I was trying out this morning.

I will see you girls for dinner, then?

_London can't see me… :( Hi half Prussian girl! Do you believe in me?_

**HetaliaFanGirl**

**Hello, Arthur! It's really cool that you made a blog too, even if Al made you. And not all Americans are stupid, we had some really intelligent people! I was offended at that statement,, but your not completely wrong, some people aren't the smartest, and I can admit that. I guess that's all. Bye! **

Hello,

I am still working out how best to punish him… ;)

Like most intelligent French people were actually foreign immigrants. As I said above, prove it.

'Not the smartest', well they are more intelligent than those bloody frogs. My apology can also be found above.

Bye.

**Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome**

**You like curry? Interesting. I never cared about it, since I'm Chinese. Don't occupy me, just saying.**  
**Hm...A question to ask? Well, Canada actually said that I was kind of like America, but smart. I am American after all...xD**  
**Hm...a question to ask you?**  
**Okay!**  
**I shall...ask you it...yeah.**  
**ARE YOU SECRETLY IN LOVE WITH ONE DIRECTION? xD**  
**I think they are too overrated, honestly. Most of the stupid citizens here fangirl over them. Just because they are British. **  
**Well, goodbye England.**

Greeting.

Yes, curry has been one of our most popular dishes since India became part of the Empire. We invented Chicken Tikka Masala. You should eat some.  
Canada? Oh, that as the other nation. You managed to find him?

'Love' would be too strong a word for it. Tolerance, possibly.

_Ugh. They're AWFUL! Can't we go back to the Beatles? They were SOOO much better._

Flying Mint Bunny, you're not supposed to say bad things about them – they keep all the girls away from the bloody frog. Although, that is their main use… It seems that your Chinese ancestry has protected you. I must enquire of this magic from China…

_(the author has not listened, the friend on her right despises them)_

Good bye.

* * *

I need to go collect my scones.

Good bye

_BYE!_

_(In final, the author would like to apologise for any mischaracterisation. She spends far to much time watching the series, but gets a little carried away. And over-protective/crazy Flying Mint Bunny is very fun to write)_


	3. Chapter 3 Bloody Brothers

Good morning,

That bloody frog has finally vacated my house, after running around bloody naked in a way only a damn Frenchman could.

Seeing as it is not worth going to bed, I have decided to look at these.

And before you ask, nothing happened.

Flying Mint Bunny is 'checking up on' something.

Scotland and Wales came to visit, too. After burning all of my tealeaves, and pouring the brewed tea on the floor, they left.

Bloody older brothers.

And France, don't you dare come bloody back here!

* * *

**The Hero yo**

**Hey old man dude!  
Guess what I'm doin with japan!  
I'm totally cosplaying as you dude!  
I'm going to be all "I'M ENGLAND! HURDERHERHER! I HAVE OLD, MOLDY TEETH CUZ I'M AN OLD MAN AND I'M UBER SHORT!"  
Cuz I'm totally taller than you. :P  
And I can crush you like a bug!  
But I totally wouldn't do that, bro. Cuz you're too awesome.  
*coughthatwastotallyaliecough *  
ANYWAYZ, Yep, I'm going to run around in a con screaming "I'M ENGLAND AND I LOVE FRANCE"  
Bye old man!**

I'm not old, you ungrateful git!

And phrasing it like that, I don't think I bloody want to know.

There is nothing wrong with my teeth. Just because misaligned or slightly yellowed teeth are not considered unattractive in my country. And neither am I short.

At least I'm not fat.

AND I DO NOT LOVE FRANCE!

…

Git.

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Hai! Konnichiwa!  
Watashi no username wa Springirth Dale desu!  
Ah-! Sumimasen!**

Let me start over. (Sorry for using Nihonjin!)

Ahem.  
Salutations.  
You can call me "Springirth Dale" or Spring or Dale, whatever you prefer. As long as it's not insulting. Like "hamburger idiot" or" bloody frog", because I am neither.

Anyway, I apologise for using Japanese at the first part..Really, really sorry.

A-Ahem...If you do not mind my asking...  
What exactly does a scone taste like? I find it quite intriguing. It's not like it can kill people, right? ... Right?

Also, how does pure English tea taste? I was about to taste some in Hong Kong's place (because there was European tea), but I was not able to, quite a pity if you ask me.  
So..how does it taste?

A-Ahem..I'm sorry for throwing these words at you so suddenly. I'm a new reader at your blog, then I have the bloody nerve to hurl words at you.  
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Well then, ciao.  
And I hope you forgive my insolence, United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

Good morning.

The apology is not required.

You seem far more reasonable than that git. Or the bloody frog.

A scone? It is the most delightful food stuff. It is a form of pastry, and can be savoury or sweet. The most common are cheese and raisin. Of course it cannot kill people. Unless you are foolish enough to choke on it.

English tea is different from European tea. It is much stronger than teas in America, although there are many different sorts. There are green teas and black teas. Black teas are most usually taken with milk, green without, although this is not a rule. Each different sort of tea tastes different – there is one tea-room which sells 72 different sorts, and this is not even the tip of the iceberg. Of which did you wish to enquire.

_(the author would like to say she frequents this tea room, but has not tried all of the teas)_

You are most welcome to speak to me. You seem like much more intelligent company that the hamburger idiot of the bloody frog, as you put them.

Good bye.

* * *

**Rizu Roraito**

**Hello again! Oh... I guess... Oh, thank you Flying Mint Bunny! :) I am happy that it does mean that.  
My question right now is... What do you think of China?  
You'd eat up France? o.O *Trying not to laugh, trying not to laugh* Okaaay, later England!**

Greetings

I will pass that on to her – she is currently 'checking up on' some of the other commenters.

And it did not.

_It did._

When did you get back?!

_Just now… I want a hug, Britain!_

Of course. You always were my favourite, Flying Mint Bunny!

My thoughts on China? He is an… interesting… character. He makes better company than the frog or the git, although he is rather full of his own importance. Occasionally, we share tea. However, the Opium wars did not help our relationship.

_He would! And not in cupcakes, either!_

I thought I trusted you, Flying Mint Bunny! Go away!

_Britain… You know I didn't mean it…_

Bloody git.

_Sowwy…_

I'll deal with this later.

Bye.

_Hi! And bye!_

* * *

**Quiet Harmony-chan**

**Hello!**

Hmm...You want me to prove it? Well I can't really do that actually, but I hope you realize that us being stupid is sorta all of the countries fault? We ARE a melting pot after all. Your government sent people here they stayed we eventually rebelled. I can barely find someone who is 100% American. Most people I know have some kind of European or some such descent. That actually applies to me. -evil grin- I've got some English, Scottish, German, and other stuff.

Long story short if we're stupid doesn't that make the rest of you just as bad?

Maybe it is the fact you are a melting point which makes you such idiots?

_He just wants you to name some clever Americans, you know. And, if you can't name any, you're proving his point._

It must be the Scottish blood in you. Bloody brothers.

**Did ya say something about me?**

Why are you in my house, Scotland?!

**Can't I come visit my favourite little brother?**

What? So you can bloody beat me up again. Bugger off. And how did I you get in here, anyway?!

**France gave me a key.**

Why does the bloody frog have a key?!

_Guys… Can we deal with this later?_

Of course, Flying Mint Bunny.

**Still talking to ya wee friends, laddie? Anyway I'll be off.**

And stay in your stupid mountains…

…

It's not like I care.

…

_I love you, Britain!_

* * *

** 444**

**Eat moi? Mon Dieu!  
Finally Britain you come running to moi! 'Ere I am with open arms! Why are you running away? Come back mon petit lapin!**

Bugger off, frog!

I am not running away, or to you – you were bloody trespassing!

And I am not a damn rabbit!

* * *

**euphemialibritannia221**

**I'm back again and wanted to ask a few questions to Britain.**

To Flying Mint Bunny, I am sorry for making you think I'm trying to stalk Britain, when that isn't the case at all.

1) Is it true that you are terrible at cooking/baking? I heard from a few people that you are terrible at it! I never said anything about your food nor have I eaten it either.

2) Did you think(not Flying Mint Bunny)by me stating my name like that was weird? I just admire you and that is all.

3) Is it true(I also heard from people)that aren't all that much of a gentleman, especially when going to a pub?

I feel bad Britain from before and want to say sorry to you...and Flying Mint Bunny. I will be back to ask some more questions.

For the writer, thank you and I will see you soon.

Greetings, and that is fine… As long as the frog stays away.

_Hum… Okay, but I'm still watching you!_

That's not very nice, Flying Mint Bunny.

_I don't care. I don't want you hurt, Britain!_

Of course I'm good at cooking! Better than the bloody frog and the git, anyway. My cooking is the very best. It is not my fault it gets sabotaged by boggarts and dark elves.

I thought it was very polite.

_I think you're a creep_

Be polite, Flying Mint Bunny! Of course I'm the perfect gentleman! Who bloody told you otherwise.

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**HEY ENGLAND! Remember when America carried your vintage Rolls Royce, when he was trying to find you so he could drive it. Tell me this by answering these questions.**

1) How much was that vintage Rolls?  
2) How big is your mansion or palace or whatever ?  
3) How many fashion designer labels you have in your bloody closet?  
4) Do you have any other luxurious cars(tell me by name)?  
5) How many Rolex watches do you own?  
6) How much are your designer tuxes?  
7) Do you have maids and butlers who serve you, or are you one of those wealthy people who prefer to be alone?  
8) How many room do you have in your home?  
9) Do you have any expensive collections, you mind telling me about?  
10) Can you tell me what other latest designer fashion and luxurious things do you have?  
11) Got a Swizz bank account(leave Switzerland out of this), well do you?  
12) How many vacation home do you have for all seasons?  
13) Do you spoil America with luxurious items when he lived with you, huh?

Lastly, you better answer every single question Iggy, yeah you heard me say IGGY! Flying Mint Bunny can mind his own business because this is between you and me. Or was that Rolls just for show/bragging rights. That is okay Iggy, because I can own a Rolls as well. A beautiful brand new Phantom Rolls with another car on the side...Maserati(thank you Italy). I'll be became to read over every answer. Got my eyes on you...Flying Mint Bunny don't try anything crazy and you as well England.

*gives both England and Flying Mint Bunny the death glare as I walk away*

I suppose I can answer these…

1) The Rolls? My government bought it for me when it was first made, in 1938. It cost just over £1600.

_(the author is not a car expert – this was the best estimate from wikipedia)_

2) I do not have my own house. When I am required in Parliament, I stay with the Prime Minister. When I am not required, I follow the Queen if she is in England. Should they be in another area of the country, the appropriate brother sees to her needs. When they go abroad, I go with them. If I am neither required by Parliament or the Queen, I have a three bedroom house in York which the government rent on my behalf.  
Prior to the Second World War, I lived in the White Tower of the Tower of London. Due to the bombing, and then subsequent opening to tourists, it was requested that I leave.  
_It was sad when we had to move out… We had to leave Edward and Richard by themselves. :(. We visit when we can. :)_

3) In my bloody closet? None. I keep them in my wardrobe. Very few, actually – I had a personal tailor under the reign of Victoria, although I usually make my own clothing.

4) Not that I own.

5) Eight. I have one for each day of the week, plus one for when I go to meetings.

6) Very cheap, as I made them myself.

7) In my 'own' house, I have one maid who keeps it clean when I am not present. When with the Queen, her servants must first serve her, then me. Usually, I have little use – except for cooking, as the Queen has banned me from the kitchens.

8) The one which is rented for me? There ten, plus the garage.

9) Most of the collections in the palaces were, at least partially, funded by myself. I do have a private collection of Flemish tapestries.  
_These questions are getting a bit… Personal. I'm watching you, missey!_

10) I can, but I shall not. It is far too easy to trace things.

11) I did once, although I think it has since been closed. Like most of 'my' property, it was controlled by the Government.

12) I do not have vacation homes. The one bonus to being a nation is that, should you want a holiday somewhere, you invite yourself for a meeting.  
_Right, and then 'forget' what the meeting was for. ;)_

13) Of course I bloody did! I was paid by the monarchy then. Any elder sibling with money would spoil the younger one, especially when you have to leave them so often. I also used to buy things for the others, but then I stopped being paid.

There, I answered all your bloody questions. The new Rolls is not very elegant.

_I don't like or trust you…_

I imagine there will be a next time…

_(the author says that much of this is based on the fact that just about all the Queen herself owns is her dogs – almost everything considered the Queen's is actually owned by the State. I see a similar thing having happened to Britain himself when it happened to the monarchy)_

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**England,  
London: That's brilliant! Thank you!  
Toni: Nooo! I need to be snuck in because I'm not old enough! (I can pay if I wanted to, and I would! Oh, hello flying mint bunny!  
London: Hello.  
Toni: So England (I'm not sure how awkward this will turn out, but I'm a Stark dammit so let's go for it) ever since I was little I have had a passion for your land and an intense desire to escape the idiocy that surrounds me by moving there. Feel honored. ;)  
London: That's probably why you're friends with me...  
Toni: One of the reasons, Ja.  
London: Can't wait to see you, nii-chan! We haven't had a free moment almost all year because of the Olympics!**

Hugs, scones, and AWESOME,

Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland

Then you'll have to wait until you are old enough, or persuade one of the counties. I am not forfeiting my currently clear criminal record, no matter how much you beg me.

_HI! Can you tell London I say hi to her too… It makes me sad that she doesn't see me._

Well, provided you abide by our rules, you work hard and you pay your taxes you are welcome. If you do not do the above, then there would be an issue.

And too true, London. The Jubilee, the Olympics, Paralympics. Although, I think I prefer this running around to family-get-togethers. I still haven't lived down when Oxfordshire threw the Queen's favourite teacup at Cambridgeshire.

_That wasn't clever… We might have managed to cover it up if she hadn't walked in. Right at that moment._

I will be back to your place fairly soon.

_BYE!_

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**me:HI IGGGYYYYYY  
Greece: wha?  
2p greece:what are you hanging upsidedown from?  
Me: the air  
2p greece:thats impossible  
Me:*falls down*why would you tell it that?! Why?!  
Anyway iggy, I want to know what you think of 2p talia. And also your eyebrows are fuzzy. CIAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOO**

My name is Britain, not Iggy, fool!

_Do you have magic, too?_

The only good things about the 2P's is that I have some manner of control over them due to my magic, and can use them to attack France. They are bloody creepy, though.

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH MY EYEBROWS, GIT!

_Please ignore him – he's a bit offensive. I like the 2P's. They're funny._

They're weird.

* * *

**RoseQuartz318**

**Oh, you've joined the blog-verse, have you? Question: Did you ever imagine what would happen if Monty Python existed in the world of Hetalia? I imagine Spain would be crashing through walls at random screaming, "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition" and Germany would be teaching self defense against fruit. And now I'm in the middle of a laughing fit. Leave it to an American like myself to think about these things. -_- Well, I wish you the best of luck!**

I haven't personally, although I believe Cornwall did – it resulted in a very contagious laughing fit across the entire bloody country.  
Either that, or Germany would be exploding due to the chaos.

_I think someone should try it. :)_

No. That's a bloody awful idea.

* * *

**IamTheAwesomePrussiaAndDenma rk**

**BRITAN hey it's the bad brothers trio together! Ja, I'm awesome..nice blog...I guess Ja... Denmark says hi!**

Hello Prussia. Denmark.

That we are…

_I'm watching you two, too!_

Thank you. Just don't hack it like you did America's.

* * *

**ShushI'mAReaderInBed**

**AHEM AHEM AHEM!**

Two things!  
1) Well done on the blog! Out of a random curiosity, do you read fanfiction?  
2) REALLY? You can see flying mint bunny ect. BUT YOU STILL CAN'T SEE CANADA! MAPLE (Growls...) I'm ashamed to be British (completely and utterly pure British, so there is no escape..) Please apologise to him.

I've read some… And now am very careful to avoid anything saying 'yaoi' or 'romance' or 'OC'. Some of the representations of characters are crap. Give me back Shakespeare, any day.

Who?

…

_North of America. The nice one._

Oh yes, lovely lad. I will go leave him an apology somewhere… And, just for you, I'll leave one here, too.

'Dear Canada,

'I am very sorry for forgetting about you, lad. I would invite you over for tea to apologise, but think this would only make the situation worse. Please accept these tealeaves instead,

'Britain.'

Not that I'll forget again, of course.

_You'll forget again._

Flying Mint Bunny! I thought you were my friend!

_I am._

Hey! Stop nuzzling me there!

* * *

**mrsdalliswinston**

**Hey again!  
Thanks! I personally find museums fascinating. My best friend...not so much...I'm probably going to be spending time at Lego Land *Sighs*  
Oh well. Just thought I'd say thanks!**

You are welcome.

It is a little… Juvenile. I am glad you like museums. There is no better way to get to know a nation than to understand their history.

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**Hello England! I'm glad to see you've made a blog! So, this is my question...**

Can anyone else see your...Fairy tale creatures? I'm sorry if this sounds impolite! I just can't find the right words...I would hope that I could see them because I absolutely love fairy tales! I always stay up late for hours reading them before I go to sleep, my mother use to read them but...I don't really know, she just stopped. I also Greek mythology, although I am pretty sure I like fairy tales more...

Also, do you like Earl Grey tea? I've wanted to try it...I hear it's pretty good. And I don't think your cooking could be that bad! Could it? England's food must not be as bad as people say...Maybe your cooking skills personally? Sorry, just a thought. I don't mean to offend you...

I still have more to say, although it was unplanned. Excuse my ranting...

Do you like reading? It's one of my favourite things to do, I usually prefer to sit alone with a book rather than talking to people...My mother says that it's a bad thing, but you can't exactly help what kind of person you are, can you?

Don't worry the ranting stops after this. Are all Americans...like America in your eyes? I'm an American, but I've been raised not to act like...Him. I don't really know much about my mother's culture...She never really taught me anything, and my father wouldn't be able to teach me anything about his because he died when I was four. It's irritating, really. Not even knowing how to speak the same language as my mother, she always speaks it with relatives and my step-father. It's going to drive me mad someday, I swear!

As I promised, that was my last comment. Goodbye, England! And say hello to Flying Mint Bunny for me!

Norway can see them, as can Romania.

_Well, if you just mean us few, we're his fairy friends! If in general, we're fae folk or the Little People._

Parents tend to stop reading children 'fairy tales', thinking them immature. This is nonsense – look up the pre-Victorian versions. They're much better. I'm glad you prefer mine to Greek, although most European folk tales are very mixed with each other.

Of course I like Earl Grey, although it tastes very good with a little bit of grapefruit juice.

My cooking is bloody brilliant, thank you. I'll even send you some to try.

_Hello, this is Uni. Britain asked me to deliver this to you, thank you._

Thank you, Uni.

_See you this evening!_

_Sure. I have some water to purify. Later._

Reading a good book is far preferable to speaking to the idiots I am supposed to attend meetings with. And no, you cannot help who you are.

Until an American gives me reason to believe otherwise, I will assume so. Would you rather I acquired Wales' viewpoint that you are all bloody murders, devious and sly?

_That's sad… I'll come and give you a hug! See you, Britain!_

What language does your mother speak?

Good bye. And I believe she's with you, anyway.

* * *

Farewell everyone.

I just need ask the government to get me some new locks…

_(Author note: I may not be able to update over the weekend, just to say. Family time… Yay… Have fun, and Froggie out!)_


	4. Chapter 4 When rabid cats attack

_(Before we begin, I always put these in time order. So, this chapter is a little different due to one of the early comments. If you would like your comment re-doing in the usual format, just say. This applies whenever something odd happens. I was going to save this for chapter 10… You will need to read the first few for it to make sense, and which person is which font is below:)_

Who's who:

England

_Flying Mint Bunny_

**Scotland**

**_Wales_**

_Uni_

**_N. Ireland_**

Eire

**ALL OF THEM PRESENT**

**Your comments**

* * *

Greeting all,

_Heya!_

Due to an emergency conference, I was unable to post yesterday, although I am not sure why I need to tell you this.

Anyhow, the issue has been resolved and I am now awaiting my brothers.

_Oh yeah… Scotty, Velshi and the Odd-balls are coming, right?_

I think you should probably refer to them properly.

_What if I don't want to?_

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**me:...*throws 2p Greece's cat at England and it starts mauling him*iggy, you should go to a hospital, 2p greeces cats have rabies.  
2p Greece:*takes his cat back*  
me: IGGY AND AMERICA SITTING IN A TREE KISSING!FIRST COMES LOVE THEN COMES MARRAGE THEN COMES A BABY IN A BABY CARRAIGE!*gets hit with 2p America's baseball bat* ow...  
2p England: would any of you like a cupcake?  
me:WE DO NOT WANT ANY OF YOUR RAT POISON CUPCAKES, COTTON CANDY HEAD!  
BYE**

Just what I needed…

And that is bloody revolting. Thank you Ameriko.

May I take one to leave out for next time the frog comes to visit? ;)

Flying Mint Bunny is in charge whilst I go deal with this.

_Will you be okay, Britain?_

Of course. I'm the bloody British Empire!

_That's kinda what I'm afraid of… Um… Guess I'm in charge now! YAAY!_

* * *

**Quiet Harmony-chan**

**Name smart Americans? Wow aren't you asking for the impossible? Nah but seriously I have no clue. Hmm...Yeah I've got nothing...Wait it's coming to me! Benjamin Franklin! Oh and Michael Bay. NOTHING beats a Michael Bay sequel. Why? Because American movies are awesome!**

**Wait I just thought of something that beats it. Anime. Hands. Down. But that's Japanese so...Okay MAYBE Monty Python rocks. So yeah...**

**Anyway...It's not because we're a melting pot. I would think that having some of the best, or worst, qualities from different nations would be a good thing. For example! Italians can cook. My Grandmother had some Italian in her and she could cook like a boss. I can also cook pretty well. See what I mean? Now what my English blood would be good for is a mystery. I guess it would keep me from getting drunk. My Dad can't hold his liquor, but hopefully the Scottish or German will negate that.**

**Man this was too long! I'm going now see ya England!**

_He was clever! I'll let you off, just don't tell Britain!_

_What are movies?_

_YEAH! Go anime! I get to watch that when Britain goes to visit Japan. Monty Python… Haven't watched that for years *giggle*. I thought you meant the Full Monty for a moment *shudder*_

_Don't tell Britain that! He'd get upset… And that makes me angry…_

_Huh? Um… Just let me get the door!_

**Aww… How cute. Wee England has a blog.**

**Defiantly ya Scott's blood, lassie. Scott's blood 'sa best for everything**

_Scotland! You're… Oh. Britain's at the hospital, so you're… Here?_

**Oi, ya'nnoying pixie. Wales wants ya when 'ee gets 'ere.**

_Oh no…_

_Next!_

* * *

**The Hero yo**

**Yes you are, England! You're like... A MILLION OR SOMETHING! I dunno!  
Pssh, get your head out of the gutters, old man. I think I may be rubbing off on you! Haha!  
Psssh, you do have jacked up teeth. And you're definitely shorter than I am. So you are short. :D And, I can pick you up like a baby. And I could probably force you in baby clothes and carry you around like a baby. And have Sealand laugh at you.  
SHUT UP, YOU LOSER! TT_TT  
Yes you do. You loooooooooooove France. IT WAS MEANT TO BEEEEEEE!**

**Old codger.**

**Don't ya go calling the wee laddie old, lad. You're implying we're older…**

**_He's, like, only a few thousand._**

**Mornin', Ireland.**

**_Hey, Scotland!_**

_Um… Irk._

**_Is Wales coming soon?_**

_Is that the door again? BYE!_

**_England is a closet pervert. :)_**

**You should have seen him when he was growing up.**

**AND THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH OUR TEETH!**

**_I want to see!_**

You should set them up on a date.

**I didn't know YOU were coming, Eire.**

Looking for something else to destroy.

**We're ruining the wee laddie's reputation. Wanna join?**

Sounds fun, Scotty.

**Scotland to you.**

Ah, and Wales is just having a 'friendly discussion' with the rabbit. Apparently.

**_Welshies._**

**Aye.**

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**Hi again!  
oh silly me! I have done such stupid mistakes and and misspell your name! I'm so so sorry!  
oh thank about your tips! I'm still learning the theory so I didn't get to really summon something but I will take them to mind :)  
but seriously you are so smart! I saw your comments on other blogs (like America's) and after reading them I fell like I read something on an encyclopedia...It is a compliment by the way:)  
and I got thomething to ask! I always see you and America argue about your languages but I don't really get the diffrence..both are English, aren't they?  
LOVE YOU**

**Nawh. Just carry on like that, lassie, and ya'll do well.**

Don't listen to him, 'e's Scottish!

**_On those grounds, you shouldn't either, Eire._**

**_What have you been doing, Wales?_**

**Do I want to know why there's blood on your jacket.**

**_Oh, I've just been having a chat with some of England's pets. Nothing to worry about._**

**Gets all his brains from us, of course.**

**_Right on!_**

**DO NOT COMPARE US TO THAT BRAT!**

* * *

**Rizu Roraito**

**(As me:)**

**Hello! Flying Mint Bunny is awesome. :D**

**Nice to know that about China. :)**

**Ah, and one thing: How did you get your tattoo? Not sure if anyone asked already... :P**

**Bye!**

**(As Spain:)**

**Hola Inglaterra! :D**

**Do you know what tea is good for colds?**

**Adios! I second that tattoo question! :P**

**_Flying Mint Bunny is an annoying little bitch, who has been disposed of. ;)_**

**_What's my brother doing with China?_**

**I'll skin him if he comes any closer!**

**_Ah… The tattoos…_**

I gave him it, of course.

**_Eire? You didn't!_**

Why, I did too. No pirate is complete without at least three tattoos…

**Where are they?**

Well, there's one on his back-end, one on his shoulder and one on the base of his neck.

**_Ah, I gave him one on his ankle last time he slept around mine._**

**Tea? *snort* Girly stuff.**

**_Lemon._**

You're a GIRL North?!

**_NO!_**

* * *

**Sophia Griffin**

**Father England! It's Marcia :D I wish I could visit London but because I'm staying with Germany and Italy at the moment, I regret to say I cannot until the next Black Magic Club meeting.**

**Big Brother America made you that blog I see! - I'll read it!**

**I can't believe you keep forgetting Big Brother Canada D: I thought you were magic too! JK.**

**Hello Flying Mint Bunny! It's been a while hasn't it? How is Uni? How's Uncle Scotland, haven't seen him in a while!**

**See you later, England.**

**England's not in right now, but I'm doing well, lassie.**

**_Puh! Magic? I'll show HIM magic! I will destroy his little faeries, then show him the might of the Welsh DRAGON!_**

Yeah, and last time you did that, you got invaded. Idiot.

**_I resent THAT statement._**

**_It's true, so suck it._**

**_And yes, I did read those 'history' books you gave me, before you ask._**

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**England,  
Toni: Of cours I'll follow the laws! What do you think I am, some sort of Juvenile delinquent? Not at all! I'm looking forward to it.  
London: oh, I remember that! I was terrified. Even though it wasn't my fault, oddly enough...but I was there.  
Toni: Hey England, have you watched Sherlock on the BBC? It's pretty awesome!  
London: oh, yeah! I've seen it. It's done byvSteven Moffat who does Doctor Who, and it's quite a masterpiece.  
Toni: I cried at the end of the new season. AND I DON'T CRY.  
London: It's true, she's hard as a rock.  
Spain: Or one of Inglaterra's scones.  
Toni: Wha...the he'll are you doing in our letter?  
Spain: Nothing!  
Toni: -_- England's scones are delicious. GTFO!  
Spain: Fine. *leaves*  
London: I told you that you shouldn't let them hang around.  
Toni: Well, I'm taking requests for them and they're fun, so no, they stay.  
London: It is your house.  
Toni: That it is. Well, until next time England!**

**May your day be filled with chocolate chip scones and AWESOME,**

**Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland**

**_Brother isn't here right now…_**

**_Scotty! He's creepin' me out!_**

**Wales, be nice to his children whilst we plan our… Next move.**

**_Fine._**

**If ya get kicked out, ya can always come to Scotland, lass.**

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**GRRRRR!**

**(sarcastically)It's a good thing you're pretty.**

**That is good that your Rolls isn't elegant, I was going to rip you a new one...with words.**

**I have some nice and sweet questions.**

**1) Do regularly attends royal gatherings when Her Majesty needs you or you do that but also work on others things that you sometimes can't make it there?**

**2) Any favorite genres of music, movies, and books(musician/actor/novelist)?**

**3) Soo Ever heard of AA, which is something you most certainly need?**

**4) When you are all alone, America nor the nations or anything/one are bothering you, what do you do?**

**5) Why don't you go back to staying a pirate, you were so sexy and beyond handsome? A beautifully sexy swashbuckler, who-well-beautiful-oh you were such a bad boy!**

**6) How do you handle yourself around a beautiful, gorgeous, and attractive woman that tries to flirt with you or one who doesn't but you would like to know her?**

**7) Along with number 6, which type of woman do you go for/what do you look for in a woman?**  
**(it is still the same either way you look at it-but damn it answer the question)**

**8) Flying Mint Bunny seems to care deeply about you or he is just another piss off thing**  
**(meaning he like you piss you off)?**

**Answer all of these questions carefully and slowly. Tell Flying Mint Bunny to keep out until you are done answering these questions.**

**I wonder what your scones taste like *takes a scone and eat it*. Hmm...its has a interesting...what...the fuck-IS WRONG WITH YOU ENGLAND? *spits out the scone and throw to the rest to the floor* UGH! HOW CAN YOU STOMACH THAT? OH DEAR GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE TO MYSELF?! YOU NEED HELP MENTALLY AND HOW TOO COOK! STOP LIVING IN DENIAL BECAUSE YOU SIMPLY CAN'T COOK- I AIN'T FAKING IT EITHER! *goes grabs a cup of water then drinks it* I'll make sure your scones *knocks down the basket of the others to the floor* doesn't hurt anyone any more.**

**1) ****_Boring… Next!_**

**2) **Oh, Swedish heavy metal, you think he watches movies? You're mistaken. He'd go back and live with Dickens, if he could.

**3) ****Hum… **_(the author is not sure what this means)_

**4) ****_He reads REALLY boring stuff, sews and drinks tea. He so… OLD_**

**He's younger than us.**

**_But he acts old._**

*snort* Too true.

**5) ****You should see him on talk like a pirate day… ;)**

**6) ****_He doesn't. _**

Why do you think he's so… Moody.

**7) ****This is your area, Wales.**

**_Well… The Mint Bunny is not here to cause any more problems… And I doubt she will ever again. ;) So don't worry you pretty little head over it._**

**Be my guest to them. Haggis is much better.**

**_Yeah… Why does everyone forget about us :( We don't even have the same foods…_**

Because you're the same country, idiots. Why you think ah left.

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**Oh, cool. I haven't really seen much of them...So I wouldn't know anyway...  
I think I meant in general...  
My mother can never seperate me from my fairy tales. One day when I was cleaning my room my mother came in and said I didn't need it. That resulted in her hand almost being broken...I'm a bit violent when someone tries to seperate me from my books...  
I looked them up, but there was something about them being 'Disturbing nightmarescapes and brutality that will sicken you.' I can't say I believe that...  
I'll have to try it, it sounds good...  
Thanks...I wonder what to do with it...Eat it?  
I feel the same way, all of the people in my school are idiots, spot-fanatics, know-it-alls even though they're STUPID! Really, the only thing they know about is MTV...  
No thank you...That would probably make me cry...I'm not a murderer, or devious, or sly, or overly obsessed with burgers, and I don't keep shotguns under my pillow. In fact, I don't even like burgers...  
Thanks, Flying Mint Bunny! that lifted up my modd after having to endure it for the entire day yesterday...  
Creole, and French. Some Spanish, but she never really speaks it...  
Goodbye, England! And yes that's true...**

**_Ah, fairy tales. Hansel and Gretel were eaten by the witch, the Little Mermaid turned into sea froth because she couldn't get the prince to love her. Good times. Good times._**

**Get a life, lassie.**

Don't bother. It'll probably kill one of you mere mortals, anyway.

**Good 'ld French.**

**_Spaniards can go to hell._**

*snort* Says you.

**Yeah, you weren't even a wee babi then.**

**_Shut up._**

* * *

**IamTheAwesomePrussiaAndDenma rk**

**the rest of the bad bruder's trio:**

**Ja, Ja Ja, we won't we have our own awesome blog so, you don't have to worry, I want to agree that America can get annoying he, well, he...just read our blog and you will see why... And well we won't stupe to his unawesome low to hack ppl blogs! That's unawesome *coughsureitiscough* ahem, that's all we awesome ppl have to say**

**_We shall crush him… _**

**_You're annoying me._**

Heya. 'Sup?

**_He has. America needs to get laid._**

**Wales…**

**_WHAT?!_**

* * *

**Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome**

**FFFF-Did I seriously forgot to follow this? Damn it...  
...My Chinese-ness totally doesn't protect me from stupidness. Damn it.  
Well, very sorry, England.  
Yes. I'm magical. *Cough* Notreally. *Cough.*  
I'm not affected by stuff. I guess...I'm just not normal. Always...I see a shirtless guy, I just shrug and walk away. I try to resist it...but, I honestly don't care...  
IHOPEIMNOTHOMOSEXUAL...*Cries.* I don't want to be homosexual! Ilikeguys, ilikeguys, ilikeguys...  
Sorry, I spazzed out on you.  
...This is probably what I get for hanging out with America for a long time...*Sigh.* -_-  
Well, I'm just glad that you don't tell me to type properly and all that other shit. Unlike Germany...*Rolls eyes.*  
Well, anyways...**

**Damn. Long review, is long.**  
**...On a scale of 1 to 10...what's your honest rating for the following characters:**  
**South Korea, Prussia, Japan, Insert-someone-here, and of course...Canada.**  
**Very sorry if I wasted your time, so...goodbye for now, I suppose?**  
**m(_)m Sorry if I failed...D:**

**_We shall also crush the Chinese…_**

**Wales. Shut up and go home, or at least find more 'creatures' to torture.**

**_You know, I do think I saw a unicorn on the way in…_**

**_Good. I don't like him._**

**That's what staying with England for too long does to you, laddie.**

Easy. Stop 'hanging out' with the moron.

**Ugh. Germany…**

**_Ooh! Fun! South Korea is defiantly his favourite!_**

**And he hates Japan**

Canada? Meh. He can come second. To last.

**_Prussia's second!_**

**_And I'm in the middle!_**

**I told you to…**

**_Ah know, ah know. I'ma just a hologram here. And's it's number ratings…_**

**Well, damn. Give them 2, 4, 5, 6, 8 depending on their ranking?**

_(author says, for serious, maybe you should invert?)_

Get lost.

* * *

**Nightkitty78**

**Hiiiiiii Iggy (just to bother you :3) \('u')/! It's soooo totally awesome that you have a blog! And hiiiiiii Flying Mint Bunny!\('u')/  
England, I heard that you're soooo totally fun when you're drunk, in a couple of years we should totes go out for drinks. \('u')/  
And not ALL Americans act like America... but I sort of do. But is that such a bad thing? He's awesome \('u')/ USA! Byeeeeeee! XD  
P.s. I am American ;D**

**Secretly, he LOVES it when you call him that.**

So, do it all the time.

**_Flying Mint Bunny is not conscious enough to receive your hello. ;)_**

**_I like America!_**

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Hello again.**

**...I see...F-France as usual...Why does he always mess with you? If I was you, I would have wiped him off the face of the Earth already, considering your military strength of course...S-Sorry.**

**Scotland and Wales too? Are you enemies or something? I read something in CNN months ago that Scotland wanted to be independent, though I don't know if this is true or not.**

**A-Ah okay...**  
**It actually sounds delicious when you describe it that way...I'll try one if I can visit your country.**  
**Teas...Teas...Teas...I wanna-I mean I want to taste authentic English tea! Not teas in bags. I'll taste your teas if I can go to your country too!**

**Um...Thank you.**

**Until next time.**

**P.S. I can't even believe my grandfather said that I have some French heritage...**  
**Ah-Please don't hate me-!**

**We all know wee brother has feelings for the man.**

**_He does? Wow. I thought he really wanted to kill him!_**

You're too naïve for your own good.

**_…_**

**_Scotty? What does naïve mean?_**

***sigh* **

**I will have my independence if it's the last thing I do!**

**_Come on, it was your monarch who was made king of England, not the other way 'round. At least YOU weren't invaded._**

They all hate each other. Why you think I left?

**_You want tea? Just make sure to visit me too!_**

Idiot.

**And us ya hear us? We want the tourism, too!**

**_You're too nice to hate…_**

**_You like everyone._**

**_Except England. And you three!_**

Hate you too.

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello England! :D I'm from Australia and it''s winter here, it's really cold. But I swear Melbourne's weather is bipolar. It will be sunny for 5 minutes and then 5 minutes later it is raining or hailing. I think British food is good! There are always the good and bad food of each country. I think scones and fish and chips are very yummy! :)  
Since Australia was once a colony I wanted to ask:  
Who was the easiest and hardest country to bring up as a child?**

**Not as cold as we get, lass.**

**_Puh. Sounds like our weather. All. The. Damn. Time._**

**I've already said, people should eat more haggis!**

**_But's it's mankey! Like chips!_**

Tusk. Idiots.

**_I wasn't born for most of that!_**

**I ignored them.**

**_Fine then. If you're asking like that, I think… Little Canada was the easiest. So naïve, so easy to lure… Hong Kong was too damn clever for his own good. Always looking to rescue the naïve ones…_**

**You're a creep. **

**_You're welcome._**

* * *

_(Author's not: Rabies is very dangerous. It is not at all common in my country, but it still is. Should anyone suspect they have been attacked by an infected animal, seek medical assistance immediatly._

_(Also... the damage of creatures is not condoned by the author-ess. The characters of Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Eire (Republic of Ireland) are not representative of the populations of these countries. Most are just as nice people as the English, although this is the last time I will admit it - we all do strongly dislike each other._

_(Thank you_

_(Froggie)_


	5. Chapter 5 Return

Good morning once again.

I am back, although have been given more tablets than I care to think about. If I were human, they would have bloody kept me there.

As for my meeting with my brothers… It was as interesting as usual. It ended when Wales bought out his bow and Eire his gun.

They are still here, although in bed. As soon as they get up, they are buggering out of my house.

Flying Mint Bunny is with me, although not looking so well and once-again asleep. I'm bloody murdering Wales when he gets up!

I should probably give my brothers appropriate introductions:

**Name: Scotland (United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Britain)**

**Year of Birth: something BC**

**Comments: Wants independence from the rest of the UK. Was the last to join, when James VI of Scotland became James I of England. Legally joined in 1801.**

**_Name: Wales_**

**_Year of Birth: something BC_**

**_Comments: Like England, was ruled by the Romans. After the Romans, split into tribal areas, to be re-unified in 1057. Invaded by the English in 1282, formally unified in 1536._**

Name: Eire, Republic of Ireland

Year of Birth: something BC

Comments: Left the UK after the troubles between the Catholics and Protestants. For a long time, relationships were strained with assassination attempts and bombings. This has recently stopped.

**_Name: Northern Ireland (United Kingdom of Great Britian and Northern Ireland, Britain)_**

**_Year of birth: 1921, partitioned from the rest of Ireland_**

**_Comments: The northern (Protestant) part of Ireland. The Irish Republic is allowed to influence some areas of policy making, as stated in the Good Friday Agreement. _**

There you have my brothers. Seeing as they and Flying Mint Bunny are still asleep, I am free to answer myself.

As per usual, your comments:

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly (repeat from previous chapter)**

**Hello England! :D I'm from Australia and it''s winter here, it's really cold. But I swear Melbourne's weather is bipolar. It will be sunny for 5 minutes and then 5 minutes later it is raining or hailing. I think British food is good! There are always the good and bad food of each country. I think scones and fish and chips are very yummy! :)  
Since Australia was once a colony I wanted to ask:  
Who was the easiest and hardest country to bring up as a child?**

Good morning.

I'm very glad you like my food – would you like a sample?

Easiest and hardest of my colonies? Sealand has been the most complicated so far. He's so bloody stubborn! India was already capable of looking after himself, although he did not take well to being rules… As such, I think Australia was probably the easiest.

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**Me:HI FLYING MINT BUNNY!  
2p england: sure.*gives mountain of cupcakes*  
Me:SCOTLAND! HI!  
2p greece:...im sorry for her stupinity  
Me:YAY!**

Ah, thank you. Now, to leave them somewhere that bloody frog will find them…

* * *

**Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome**

**...I'm so confused. Seriously. Who was answering who. Ugh. I don't know.  
Now I'm going to feel annoyed for the rest of my Sunday.  
Yay.  
...Crush the Chinese, also...*Rolls eyes.* Whatever.  
And now I'm going to say one thing...  
If I had to pick one out of all of you, I'd say that I like England the best.  
...Seriously.  
FrUk. Just saying.  
...Yeah, I should seriously...But eh, he's my country. And I'm American. So I got a reason.  
You know, I think it's fun to say "FrUK" all of the time. It's totally going to piss you off, but I don't really mind.  
...Eh...so you actually think that S. Korea is nice? Well, I'm just going to assume that your brothers were lying to me about that. Tell me YOUR honest opinion on it.**

Please assume everything my brothers said is a lie. They seem to be trying to destroy any reputation I have. Bloody morons. Please excuse me a moment…

…

Glad you see sense in the matter.

If you invert the order given by my brothers, then it is closer to the truth.

You had better bloody not! That intolerable git is damn annoying, and that sounds like bloody swearing!

* * *

**The Hero yo**

**Hey dudes!  
You ARE all old...  
...Don't correct me.**

I did not know that. HOLY SHIT! IMMA SAY ALL THIS PERVERTED STUFF AND MAKE HIM PLAY INNUENDO BINGO AND *spazzes out*

WHAT WAS HE LIKE GROWING UP?! I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEED TO KNOOOOOW! France told me he grew his hair out UBER long *snickers*

They're all jacked up. And yellow. Of course there is something wrong with your teeth!

I SHALL! France will agree, no doubt...

I didn't know YOU were coming, Eire.

...I. love. Rabbits. :D  
Okey, byeeeeeeeeeeee.  
PS: Why on earth do I need to get laid?! Maybe by Vanessa Hudgens...Hmm...

Where did I go wrong? You were so adorable as a colony.

Next time I bloody see you, I'll bloody slap you.

Don't you DARE!

*sigh*

I'm not going to give that a bloody answer, and I'm not getting the others to do it, either.

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**What? Really? ...Ahaha...I wasn't expecting that. I mean, how does one like a perverted French man?**

All of you seem like a pretty fun bunch to hang out with! :D

Oh, so it was true? About the independence thing I mean. But what will happen to England if you did get independent? It wouldn't be "United Kingdom" anymore, right?

Ah, sure sure! I'll visit you! Someday.

Ah..th-thanks...I thought you would hate me because I have a little French,Spanish and Chinese heritage in me. To tell you the truth, I guess it's better having some British heritage, huh?

S-So you have sibling quarrels too... Ahaha...

Well then, until next time! :)

I do not like him! He's a bloody idiot, and damn perverted. Gits. All of my bloody brothers.

I regret ever having invaded Wales. He can bloody bugger off. But of course, he wants to stay. We'd be the bloody United Kingdom of England, Wales and Northern Ireland, of course.

I will look forward to it.

You seem to also dislike the frog, and seem far more sensible. And exactly.

Bloody yes.

* * *

**Dalca **

**Oh, you too? My boss is hinting I do the same, but I'd much rather be out on the ocean. As soon as I get another sail (... and some vacation time - work is stressful) I'm off to Greece. Care to come with? It'll be just like the old days... except I'm in charge of sailing because you kind of sucked back then and I doubt you've gotten better. No offense, of course! ;)**

Antonio sends his love. Kind of. What he actually said translates to something I refuse to write. I'm a proper young lady, I don't write that kind of shit.

Anyway. I'll catch you later I guess... I'm going back to my garden. Or maybe I'll lob tomatoes and the back of Netherland's head and blame it on Spain... decisions, decision...

Adeus, from Portugal.

I was a bloody pirate, I can damn well sail well, git! Greece? As long as the rioting stops, I guess…

I see… I shall ensure he gets an appropriate response.

Goodbye,

England/Britain.

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**Toni: XD well that was interesting...and I'm legit part Scottish, too (everything from the British isles except Welsh...sorry Wales) so I probably will someday! (I used to travel but my nii-chan needs me here so Ja...)  
London: What do you mean by that? You're on the opposite coast of the states from him!  
Toni: We can FLY, London. Not that hard.  
London: Right, right...hey, big brother, since you never answered our question about Sherlock on BBC we'll ask it again. Have you watched it?  
Toni: It's written by one of the writers from Doctor Who and it's brilliant! I cried at the end of the second season, and I'm pretty tough.  
London: She is...she hasn't cried in any movie in recent memory!  
Toni: True. All right, bye England!**

Logging off,

Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland

Ah, yes. I have seen Sherlock. Not nearly as good as the original novels, but very good.

_(The author notes that, although she hears lots about it, she has only seen the first episode)_

There are already many theories about his survival. However, it is quite a while until the next series comes out.

* * *

**Sophia Griffin**

**AH! How on earth did that person handle 2P Greece's cat without getting mauled as well?! O-O**

:D YAY my uncles took over Iggy's blog! -

Wales... What on earth didya do to Flyin' Mint Bunny?!  
Scotland, what is haggis...?  
Ireland... mankey... O-o?  
Eire, You gave England tatoos? AWESOME :D Do ya think you could give me a temporary one, like the ones that last for a month?! :D I want to see if I can scare my brothers with it XD

I am not certain… All I know is that they did.

*sigh* They did. I'll go wake them up for you… ;)

…

**_Flying Mint Bunny? I took my little knife to her, then hexed her with proper Welsh magic! She will regret having chosen to protect my little brother… ;)_**

**Haggis? Why, lass, sheep's pluck with onions, oatmeal and herbs in an animal's stomach. Most usually the sheep's. Best food in all the world, 'cept maybe deep fried Mars Bars...**

**_Yeah. Mankey. Like yucky, or naff! America thinks my teeth are mankey, but everyone here says they're pretty!_**

To scare people with? I imagine I could do that. What design? Bleeding wounds? Love notes? Apocalyptic messages?

**_Scotty… I'm hungry…_**

***snort* Fine.**

**_I'll come too. I never did find the unicorn. ;)_**

…

Thank goodness sent Uni to deliver a message to Norway for me.

* * *

**OMG CATS**

**Hi there! I think you're awesome!**

I have a question for you England: Why did you accept Belgium's offer asking you to protect her neutrality during 1839 when it was obvious that you were provoking the countries around her when you did that? Did she like, use a... Special method of persuasion? I'd also like to ask if you've tried to get America to eat one of Japan's said to be 'healthier and less oily' rice burgers.

And that's all. Dem eyebrows are actually nice.

Well, thank you. I do not see why people think my eyebrows are so disgusting – they are very carefully trimmed to perfection!

In 1839? Ah, yes. The Treaty of London. The countries around her also signed. I was bloody fed up of the Netherlands constantly beating up the smaller countries around him, and still had to repay him for the 'Glorious Revolution' of 1688. This treaty was one reason why we joined WW1.

If you just tell him it is a 'burger' he will eat it without issue.

* * *

**Guest**

**Greetings from the Darkside. Would you like a cookie?  
It's chocolate.  
*In deep demonic voice* Dark Chocolate.  
*Normal voice* Ofcourse, we put honey and maple syrup in to keep them sweet.**

Been reading some blogs. This one is interesting. Brothers are quite interesting aswell...

I don't know if it is Monsieur England or his brothers answering, but I guess it won't matter. Do you have any interesting Fae Tales or Ghost stories you would be willing to share? If you do, I'll share with you a famous ghost story from the area.

And a riddle for fun: What falls and cracks, but smiles when you smile?

-The Darkside

No thank you.

Well, thank you. And you had better not be bloody French.

Fae tales or ghost stories… Hum… There is one from Cheshire _(the author says it can also be found in Shropshire)_ where a fisherman caught a beautiful woman in his nets at night. He grabbed the woman, intending to take her home as his wife. As they approached the shore, her strength faded, as she begged him to let her go. When they reached the shore, all that was left was a puddle of water in the boat, and a welt on the man where he had touched her. The welt never left him all his life.

I can think of three answers to that – your lips crack when they are dry, fall when you frown and the smiling is obvious. There is also the voice, which smiles with you, then falls when it breaks and cracks with a sore throat. The final is a mirror – it cracks if you hit it, falls if you drop it, and your reflection smiles at you. I doubt any are the bloody right one, though.

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**I JUST woke up and I'm already pissed off. *Points an accusing finger at England's brothers***

That actually sounds better than the original...Too many happy endings in the ones I've read. Just 'cause it's a fairy tale doesn't really mean the main character can't die...

Solo perché mi piace favole vuol dire che ho bisogno di avere una vita? Chiudi il becco fottuto figlio di una cagna!

If you didn't mean because I like fairy tales then...Sorry. But I'm pretty sure you did...and I know I used a different language...I felt like it.

That's kind of why I didn't eat it...Sorry, England. I didn't want to die just yet...

My mother is not a Spaniard or however you spell your damn word! She just knows a bit of the language. It has nothing to do with your hatred of Spaniards! And last time I checked, this was a response to England's question. So Shut. Your. Freaking. Mouth.

Thanks for making me mad...I'm hungry so I'm going to go now. Bye...Various people that I am too lazy to name...

Bye Uni! Bye Flying Mint Bunny! *I couldn't help it...They're just epic*

They were summaries of the original that Wales decided to grace you with. By the way, my brothers make pissing people off a speciality.

I believe they were referring to your reading. Personally, I think you have a bloody better one than my brothers – having time to read, and reading, sounds delightful.

_Ugh… What happened?_

Flying Mint Bunny! You're awake!

_Please be quite… Everything hurts._

I'll try.

_Please pretend to eat them… Otherwise I'll stalk you too! … When I feel better…_

I'd offer to hit them for you, but the bloody gits are doing it themselves in my kitchen.

_Bye…_

* * *

**America's Suiteheart**

**HI ENGLAND! Can I have some scones, please? With chocolate chips?**

I'd like to point something out before we really get going. I am not (sadly) America's sweetheart. "America's Suitehearts" is a song by a band I very much love, and my favorite songs are my usernames. But since there is only one of me, I am just America's Suiteheart.

Flying Mint Bunny, I think you're super awesome. Don't let the boggarts get to you.

And now, I'm here to settle the "All Americans are idiots" issue. Although nowadays we are famous for the stupid people (rednecks, Kim Kardashian, Chris Brown, etc.) many of us are smart. 12 of the top 20 colleges in the world are in the USA. We have such genius minds, like:  
1) Martin Luther King, Jr.  
2) Benjamin Franklin  
3) Thomas Edison  
4) George Washington Carver  
5) Bill Gates  
... And countless others. Just because some if us are stupid doesn't mean all of us are.

So now that we have THAT settled, I have a question for you (or pour vous as the gorgeous frog would say.) What led you to have such a prejudice against all of Americans?  
LOVE YOU, ARTHUR!

Of course you may. I'll send them via Uni when he gets in. Chocolate chips are not a … usual flavour.

I guessed by the separate spelling. Sadly? I don't know what people see in the annoying git.

_Thank you… *giggle* I'll try. My wings hurt right now… And feet and head, and everything else…_

Are you sure you're alright, Flying Mint Bunny?

_If you're the 'Bloody British Empire', I'm your 'bloody sidekick'. I'll be fine… Eventually._

Maybe that is the case… My contact with Americans is fairly limited to your country himself, who wouldn't be able to organise a piss up in a brewery.

Gorgeous? He's a bloody eyesore!

…

_Great… I guess I have to answer this… Ow… Typing hurts too… I believe the answer he would give when drunk is 'bloody America and his damn revolution', then cry about losing his sweet little brother to the idiocy of the French._

_Bye… I'm sure he'll say it in a minute of three._

Ábéodan

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**AA Alcoholics Anonymous(A place someone would go to get help with their drinking problem, its a meeting of sort to help you control your addiction).**

You all sound like a really fucked up family, who could have killed each other when giving the chances, if you strongly dislike each other that much.

Fun thing to say and ask

1)Which one of you states liking Swedish metal and which band do you like?

If you claim to be a gentleman, then stop saying that you are when you half the time don't behave like one. When you go to the pub(a place you shouldn't be in the first place) the gentlemen in you die and the pirate is reborn. I'm surprised that you haven't caused a bar fight-actually that doesn't sound like a bad idea. Holy shit on a brick, you have to go to a pub again, get him so drunk and have somebody hit him with a beer bottle. I want to see drunken England kick someone's ass. I bet a crap ton of money to see if he can fuck shit up.

2)Another than drinking up a storm, do you smoke up one as well(Cigars, cigarettes, weed, and/or anything else)?

3)Any one wants to go on a road trip, we can party like rock stars all together, but England stays home?

To the writer, will the bros. be back to answer more and it seems fine that they asked questions.  
Thanks a bunches and take care!

Until next time then!

_(the author says thanks!)_

I don't bloody have a drinking problem.

Apparently, when you invade someone, they do not die. If I could kill them, Wales would be long dead…

1) That was Eire… I have a feeling he was trying to ruin my reputation. If you force me to choose one, Blindside.  
_(the author states this is the only one she has heard)_

Of course I'm a gentleman!  
_Bar fights? He gets into them quite often._

I thought you were on my side! And injured!

_I am… But you shouldn't lie._

2) Of course not. I have a bloody reputation to uphold! Although, I did take cigars, pipes and cigarettes before it was realised they were a danger to health.

3) I'm sure they would… I will say no.

**_Hell yeah! Let's go mutilate fantastical creatures of non-Welsh origin!_**

**_What's a road trip? It sounds like fun!_**

**I'll be coming, lassie!**

We going via London? If so…

Where did you buggers come from?!

We've eaten, so we're here to annoy you.

**_Hello, little bunny… ;)_**

_Eep… But watch out creeper! When I'm better, I'm coming after you!_

**_You'll be going after no-one…_**

Wales. Leave the rabbit alone.

_(the author replies thank you, and that they will appear periodically from now on, with one chapter's notice. They are unlikely to turn up more than 2 a chapter from now)._

* * *

** 444**

**Bonjour, I have become very worried Britain! Someone reviewed my blog ranting zat they prefer you to me! Zey wanted to pair you with America as well! I wondered if zey were a spy of yours or possibly involved with you getting the olympics, non? -_-**

What are you doing back here, frog?!

Well, I did not send them.

Oh, please… Sexual tensions with the Frenchman. Just kiss 'im and be over with it.

And I won them fair and square, git!

* * *

**Rizu Roraito**

**(As me:)**

Why Flying Mint Bunny? D: Aww...

...And I am so confused. xD I would love the usual format.

(As Spain:)

Ah... Gracias. :D

**_Because she is an annoying little brat, who shall be destroyed. I thought I disposed of her, but evidently not._**

_Britain… He's scaring me again!_

Wales, stop it or bugger off!  
**_I'll be back_**

**_…_**

**_Where did Welshi go?_**

Good riddance.

_(the author says sorry, but it will be back next time, when there will be no extra characters – just England Britain and Flying Mint Bunny)_

**_You're welcome!_**

* * *

**HetaliaFanGirl **

**Hello! It's nice to finally meet the rest of Arthur's brothers! Especially Wales, cause I'm a little bit Welsh. So, do you guys really always argue? It kind of seems like it. Poor Flying Mint Bunny D: I guess that's all, bye ya guys!**

_(The author says I really hope I didn't offend anyone with Wales – personally, I think the Welsh are the nicest)_

**Well, hello lassie.**

**_Hi! Wales 'Buggered off'!_**

North! If I hear that language from you again, I'll put my bombs with you!

They're leaving soon. And she will be okay… Right?

_Right! Thank you… :)_

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**woooow... The great Britain has a blog...  
Hey, hey Britain. What will you do if you were Apotoxined?  
er, 'Apotoxined' is a term I use for someone who was shrunk. I'm a Detective Conan fan soooo...  
Hehehe**

If I shrank? I'd use magic to turn myself back to normal.

**We all know that'll fail. Damn foriegners and their stupid questions.**

**_I'd live in a strawberry!_**

Shut up, North.

This is boring – I'm leaving.

**_Wait! Eire! I need a lift!_**

Well then, I'd bloody get revenge on whoever shrank me. You leaving too, Scotland?

**I still want my independence.**

Bloody independence! Go and persuade the bloody Prime Minister, for all I care!

**Have fun ***ing yourself.**

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hi! :D I'm glad your er.. brothers replied! :) My sister is going to Europe next year and I'm so jealous! :(  
At school we are studying a lot about invasions on England.  
Question, what was it like to meet Australia for the first time? (haha I'm patriotic, but isn't everybody?)  
Also, do you know if New Zealand is a girl or a boy? (they say Australians hate Kiwi's but I think they're cool :D)  
Last question! What do you think of Monaco? Is she better then France?**

I've also given you a response. Which part? And I'm sure you'll get to.

…

_I told people to stop upsetting him!  
_I used to get invaded a lot, as a child. I will defend my boarders against any other bloody invaders, come hell or high water, I will not lose my freedom again!

Australia for the first time? I got off my ship, and was exploring away from my crew. A little way onto the new island, a crocodile ran into me. Behind the crocodile was little Australia, trying to get it back on a lead. Wonderful little lad.

*laughs* There's one for each of the main islands. They both look the same, but one is a girl and the other a boy. Very few people can tell them apart. Only one ever leaves the country at any given time, however.

_(The author would like to say there is no official gender, and I liked this idea too much)_

Of course she's better than the bloody frog.

* * *

Well, that is all for today. My brothers have left for their own houses, and I am not expecting them back soon.

Good bye.

_BYE!_


	6. Chapter 6

Good morning,

The Paralympic opening ceremony is tonight, so everyone is a little busy preparing.

My brothers have finally buggered off, though.

_Hi… I'm feeling better! _

_…_

_A bit…_

Ah, yes. Flying Mint Bunny is still here.

You had all better bloody watch the opening ceremony tonight!

_YEAH!_

Now, to comments…

* * *

**IamTheAwesomePrussiaAndDenma rk**

**I'm not annoying! KESESESESESE america does need to get laid and...hey! I guess so**

_I don't think you're annoying, Prussia!_

No comment, although please go explain to him the implications of that statement. But don't you bloody dare do anything!

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**me:*holds up one of 2p greeces rabid kitties* do you want a kitty?they have rabies.**

_GET THAT AWAY FROM BRITAIN!_

No I do not want a bloody rabid cat.

* * *

**HetaliaFanGirl **

**Hello, Arthur, Flying Mint Bunny, and whoever else might be there! Are you alright Bunny? Sorry, I don't know what else to call you. Wow, I would hate having that many brothers. Are they all older than you as well? That would suck even more and I would know, I'm the youngest of four. I hope you get better Bunny! Bye you guys!**

Good day

_Heya! _

Northern Ireland is younger than me, but the rest are bloody older.

_Thanks! I'm feeling a lot better, although I still can't quite fly properly… :(_

* * *

**Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome**

**Oh, I see. They totally want to screw up your life.  
Pfft...well...uh...  
Oh yeah, have you ever got trolled on the internet before? I'll add bonus points it was by America!  
...Bonus points for your loser-ish list, of course.  
Just kidding. Seriously. I'm not that mean.  
I know that America got trolled a whole lot by Belarus and Vietnam. They troll him, easily. He just wouldn't admit it.  
He totally got trolled by you, I'm guessing.  
Oh..and...hm...What if America was a girl? How would you raise her?  
Well, goodbye!**

As vulgar a way of putting it as that is, yes.

Of course I bloody haven't! And if I ever will be, I'll troll them back twice as bloody hard.

_*cough*America. Both ways.*cough*_

Flying Mint Bunny…

_*innocent smile* Yes?_

If America was a girl? I would have made her dolls instead of toy soldiers, but little else different…

_Thanks… You sent him off in a daydream… He'll be drinking come evening._

* * *

**Puttylol**

**I actually tried a scone before. I was kinda relunctant because of all these stories xD I have to admit it did taste bland.. I suppose it's suppose to taste like that, but I didn't like bland stuff. ㅇㅅㅇ**

Scones are bloody brilliant! Come here and I'll make you one!

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Ah okay..But I thought your brothers said-Oh, never mind.**

Ahh, then if you'll be "United Kingdom of England, Wales and Northern Ireland", Scotland will be on his own, then...what about the territory?

:)

Yes, I do dislike him a little bit.  
Thanks! :3 Yup, exactly! :D

...Sibling quarrels...  
It's so common.

Well then, until next time!

P.S. Your brothers were fun! :D

Hum?

Which territories are we discussing here? The Crown Dependencies belong to the Queen, whilst the overseas territories belong to Westminster.

_Too common… You should see Spain and Portugal! It's really funny when they get going._

They are not bloody fun to live near.

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**Hello there! I went to the theatre yesterday so I couldn't comment on your blog :( it was fun to be with my family but the play itself was really bad :( I'm NOT letting my dad to choose the play ever again!  
What do you love more? movies, plays or books? I love reading the most :)  
But where is my manners? Scotland, Wales, Eire, Northern Ireland if you are still there. HELLO! nice to meet you! and please take good care on England!  
oh and Flying Mint Bunny! Remember me? I met you and Uni once in the conference of magical creaturs! probably don't... anyway you are adorable! say hi to Uni from me :)  
LOVE YOU  
P.S- All of you are really old... I mean my country is just 64 years old..my grandma was at our Declaration of Independence :)  
so yes all of you are REALLY old...**

Theatre's best when you see something good. Shakespeare, Lloyd Webber…

Reading is by far the best, as your own imagination can create the word between the lines.

Like they've ever taken bloody good care…

_Britain… Please stop sulking… Um… I'll go make tea!_

Flying Mint Bunny! You'll hurt yourself.

_You asked for tea?_

_Hi Uni! And hello whoever you are! I'll pretend to remember you!_

_I remember. A unicorn never forgets!_

Surely that's an elephant?

_Humph._

I'm not bloody old, your country's bloody young! China's older!

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**Toni: I agree, England. I loves it so!  
London: She has good taste in television shows.  
Toni: That I do.  
London: Did you ever get around to arranging that vacation with your brother?  
Toni: *snorts* With my brother, it'll be more, um, public than most people's vacations. But I think he's up to it. I told him we have to visit England!  
London: Cool, we can see my nii-chan  
Toni: Ja! And on that note, England, any places you reccommend? This'll be my only trip, pretty much, so I want to make it count!**

Peace, love, and scones

Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland

I made some recommendations in the second chapter, although if you require more…

_Yorvik! It's in York, but really cool!_

Thank you, Flying Mint Bunny, but Miss Toni is probably not looking to go that far out of London. Most of the year round parts of the Royal Residences are open. London zoo is often a disappointment, although going is not a total waste of time.

* * *

**Nameless Naridam**

**Oh, another blog? Konnichiwa Igirisu-San!  
...Yes, I am Japanese, and I'm in America. DX**

Anyways, I've always wondered if you've met your 2P self...You know, the pink and blue gentleman obsessed with cupcakes? Yes, that one. If not, I suggest you stay away from mirrors. I fear it may be the end of you if you are not careful.

Also, Konnichiwa Flying Mint Bunny.  
Sayonara.

_HEYA!_

Hello.

Have met my 2P self a … very few times. He is preferable to some of the other 2Ps, but still should be avoided. They're bloody mad.

_(The author says her head-canon makes the 2Ps compete in the Paralympics, and so they'd all be staying in London at the moment. :) )_

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**I just woke up...AGAIN...I need to stop staying up late...**

It is nice when my mother isn't giving me a hundred things to do at a time...I usually read while I'm supposed to be in bed, that way she can't disturb me since she thinks I'm sleeping.

Flying Mint Bunny? What did they do? Are you okay? You have to take better care of her, Arthur! What, did you leave her with them? If you did...*Sigh* What are we going to do with you...

Oh look at that, I sound like a mother scolding her child...(I've been getting too many lectures from mom...)

Anyway, I already ate it...I was really hungry...And I didn't want to make anything...You get it, right? Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be...  
But Flying Mint Bunny stalking me? If it's not in a creepy way I'd probably enjoy that...But if it's in a "Seven days..." way then...I wouldn't really like that...

I hope they ki- come out with major injuries...

Bye, England. Bye Flying Mint Bunny, I hope you feel better soon.

P.S I seriously need to say something about America's comment. YOU GUYS ARE COUNTRIES. You've been around for a long time, and so has America. Probably one of the youngest...But he's old too! So I can call America an old man and it would make just as much sense as him calling you guys old.

Had to say it...Bye again!

That's not overly uncommon.

_I'm nearly okay now… Velshi (Wales gets annoyed when I call him this) decided to try and cut my wings off, then, when he couldn't get through them, generally beat me up... But I'm okay now! I just can't fly yet!_

It's not my bloody fault! Wales wasn't supposed to be there for another few hours, and I wasn't planning on getting attacked by a rabid cat!

_*giggle*_

Good. I told you they weren't bloody toxic.

_What do you mean a ''Seven Days'' way? I'm only going to follow you to make sure you don't hurt Britain! But you ate them… So I'll deal with the others first._

Please forgive her. She's bloody over-protective.

They're too bloody lucky for that.

_In human terms we're ALL old. I'm over 500,000 years old! I was born before even Britain's mother. I never met her until she was fading, and asked me to look after him. :)_

* * *

**The Hero yo**

**I AM still adorable, old man.  
Psssssh, COME AT ME BRO! YOU CAN'T HURT ME!  
Let's see if I can get you to blush, yah?  
What's a short thing that gets longer as you hold it, goes over a woman's breast and into a hole? Hmmmm?**

No you're bloody not. You're a bloody fat imbecile, who's sentencing himself to an early grave, with a damn hero complex!

_*giggle*_

I'm finding my bloody magic book…

W-What?!

_I know! I know! A snake!_

Bugger off.

* * *

**Sophia Griffin**

**EWWWWWWWWW HAGGIS SOUNDS HORRIBLE DX I would even eat Iggy's scones compared to that... Sorry Uncle Scotland...  
Uhm... I'd say... expirament with your darker creativity Eire XD It won't take much to scare 'MERICAAAAAA- but Canada? And possibley my Father... Muhahaha XD  
Ohhhhhh, Mankey! Mankey's also a Pokemon ;P  
HOLY FUUUUUUUU- WALES WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING! D:  
(tell them I said all that please :P)**

Iggy! Hey! You feeling better? That many pills CAN'T be good for you... But then again, It won't kill you XD  
Flying Mint Bunny, I hope you get over your... Hang over -I guess?- soon.

England, do you really like when people call you Iggy? *puppy eyes* Do youuuu?

My scones are not that bloody awful.

I will pass on the message.

I'm fine – symptoms don't kick in until it's too late to do anything about it. I wouldn't recommend taking them without medical orders.

_I'm better-ish! I just can't fly! :(_

Do not bloody call me that!

* * *

**euphemialibritannia221**

**Sir Britain- I mean Britain, I'm sorry about that. I have questions for you only two though.**

1) Are there any fiction genre that you love to read(do you like reading books)?

2) Do you or have you ever been to a cafe ?

I'll be back with more and thank you very much for letting me ask questions * does a courtesy*

For the author, thank very much!

Good morning to you,

1) I particularly enjoy fantasy fiction and mysteries. However, any book will be read. Except the bloody frog's books.

2) I have been to tearooms, do they count? And the damn frog forced me into one last time there was a meeting in Paris.

_I'm still watching you, creeper!_

She's not a bloody creeper – she's polite.

_(The author replies, you're welcome!)_

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**1) So England, what would you do in front of a beautiful British woman introduce herself to you and this woman wants to go on a date with you, how would you go about this? Even a cutie like you needs a sweet loving woman, don't you think so? England, you would make a sweet boyfriend for a wonderful girl.**

2) What was your mom like if you can remember some things?

3) Tell me what made you give up on the pirate life? Did something happen to you (physically or emotionally)? You were a very handsome pirate, I had stated before, did the woman back then fallen for you?

4) Do you know who America's mother is? Have you met his children(fifty states)?

5)I-uh-heard about your mother but-uh-I don't know, do you have a father and are trying to be a father figure to America because of this?

6) Ever heard of the American Civil War(if not ask him), he wasn't at his strongest at that time?

7) You don't get along with your brothers, huh, what is that all about?

8) You share a love/hate relationship for America, do you not?

England, you are an old man, your appearance tells otherwise. Human wise, you look fantastically handsome and older than me (I'm 21). Realistically, you are ancient, but so is the other countries as well. China is older than everyone else, so relax beautiful.

To the writer, thanks a bunches and take care!

1) Well, thank you. I would accept her offer, then take her to a beautiful little tearooms, and buy her afternoon tea.

2) My mother was… All I can remember was shocking red hair. And it's Mum, not Mom, American.

3) I didn't have time for a bloody woman – I had a bloody family to look after. I stopped sailing the seas because my ship broke

_Uh-huh. He wanted to spend more time with his ickle colonies!_

4) America's mother? I don't even know who his bloody father is. And I have heard about, but not met, them.

5) If I can't remember my mother, how do you expect me to remember my bloody father? The git scampered off when he realised mother was pregnant again, if Scotland is to be believed. Rome was the most damn-awful parent you could ever imagine, and Germania not much better. Even bloody Denmark was better than Rome!

6) Of course I have. It is often the case that you are at your strongest whilst bloody weak inside. My third and fourth civil wars _(the author says these are known as the First and Second English Civil Wars) _were whilst I ruled the bloody American.

7) …

_If you really want to know, they beat him up as a child. Scotland shot at him once Rome left, Wales did too. Eire tried to kill him much more recently. Whenever he went for help, he'd be beaten up. By his non-related older brothers, too._

_I still don't like you, though. These questions are too personal! I'm watching you, stalker!_

8) *choke* What are you implying?! He used to be damn adorable, but now he's bloody annoying!

Exactly. Tell that to the bloody American.

_… You better not hurt Britain._

_(the writer replies you're welcome, and you too!)_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello... again. I'm sorry for upsetting you! Maybe they invaded you because you were a cute child?  
My sister said she wants to go to England and France (mainly for shopping, I don't get why).  
What kind of tea do you like best? I personally like earl grey the best.  
Also, how do countries age?**

To the author: You update so fast! I like it! :D

I was not bloody cute.

_He was very cute! But they always hurt him when they invaded… :( I don't like them._

We have bloody better shops than the French!

We age with the strength of our country – as we grow stronger we got older until we reach about 20, although cannot get beyond 15 whilst owned by another country. You can then age up to 30, by losing your grip on your Empire. When you get beyond the human age of 29, you cease to exist.

_(The author says thank you, and that the aging matter is entirely fabricated. She will not be able to update nearly as frequently once Sixth Form starts back)_

* * *

_(Wow… That took an hour and a half. I hope you're happy)_


	7. Seventh Post Paralympics

Please excuse the lack of updating recently. I have been very occupied with the Paralympics at least in so far as keeping the 2Ps in the Olympic park _(the author says see previous or ask.)_

_Heya, I'm better now, so be prepared for trouble!_

Ah, yes. Flying Mint Bunny is still here, too.

_Sweet! And Britain's siblings have all gone back to their capitals, so all's good._

Ah, look. The advert break is over…

_Game ON!_

We just lost the wheelchair basketball to… Who?

_Who who?_

… Canada?

_Not a clue._

Ne'er mind. I lost, anyway.

_TO THE COMMENTS!_

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**I guess so.**

He's lucky I can't find him. Why would he even want to hurt you! You're like, the most adorable creature in the world! What does he have against you? Probably jealous because you're actually sane...

Rabid cat? Oh, gosh, I'm sorry for laughing! I didn't mean to! It's just, Urm...Kind of funny...But I wouldn't really like to be attacked by a rabid cat...

You were right, happy? But 2p!England's cooking is toxic from what I've heard...I also think he may be a bit kill-crazy...

Like...Horror movie kind of way, kill-crazy stalker, y'know? I feel as if I'd started watching America's movies...

It's okay, I don't mind.

That's too bad...

So England has a mother? Do other countries have mothers too...?

Good afternoon,

_*giggle* That's nice of you. I don't like I when he used to hurt England... So he tries to get rid of me. I can fly again, now!_

_Sane?_

Don't you bloody laugh! That damned second player Greece sent it to attack me!

Humph.  
_Ahh… You made him all proud of himself now.  
_Well, I told you there was nothing bloody wrong with my cooking!

_Oh, no… Just to make sure you don't hurt Britain! If anyone dare hurt him again… Even Russia would not be able to protect them!_

Had, love. The parent of a country is simply who you inherit it from – I believe Greece also had a mother, whilst the Italys had their grandfather.

_Well, it's a bit more complicated than that, involving some geneticey stuff and similar._

* * *

**HetaliaFanGirl **

**Hey Arthur, Bunny! I suppose you're happy they left? I would be to if I was you, since they act like that! You should take it easy for a while Bunny, I don't want you to get even more hurt. I have a question if you don't mind. Have you ever listened to the nations' character songs? I am absolutely in love with them! I really like yours, especially Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman! If you haven't heard the others, you should. I personally don't like America's though. I guess that's all, bye!**

Afternoon.

_Hey!_

Good riddance, bloody brothers.

_I have, and I'm better now! Britain won't let me stalk people again, yet, but I can FLY!_

I cannot say I have… Although that does sound bloody brilliant. And of course mine is better than te idiot American's.

* * *

**The Hero yo**

**...WELL YOU'RE RUDE! I THOUGHT YOU WERE A GENTLEMAN! APOLOGIZE TO THE HERO, OLD MAN!  
Pashuh, no. A seat belt. Duh.  
DID I MAKE YOU BLUSH?! HAHA!  
Also, I read this fanfic and it says I think you're a girl, AND IT TOTALLY MAKES SENSE! HAHA! You cook (horribly), you sew or some shit like that, and YOU DRESS IN DRESSES ACCORDING TO FRANCE! HAHA!**

I will not bloody apologise to an insolent git! Especially not YOU!  
_Ugh. Of COURSE!  
_Of course you bloody didn't.  
I AM NOT FEMALE! My cooking is brilliant, and just you remember it! Sewing is a useful skill, and I do NOT wear bloody dresses!  
_*hiss* You made him cry… I'm going to hurt you…  
_Bunny…  
_Britain?  
_Don't bother.  
_But…  
_I told you to leave it!  
_Fine. But if he does it again…_

* * *

**Greece's kitty  
Me:*eye twitch* ...take it...  
2p greece:...dont take it  
Me: *eyes glow red*TAKE IT OR DIE!  
2p greece:...dont take it.**

I do not want the damn cat, and you cannot kill me – I'm the British Empire!  
_Please don't start this again…_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly  
Hi.. yet again. Haha I seem kind of stalkerish don't I? Don't worry I can't and wouldn't stalk you.  
I'm sure your right about not being cute *coughmintbunnyisrightcough*  
Uh you forgot to answer my first question so:  
What kind of tea do you like best?  
Another question is:  
What sport do you like best?  
I've got a giant world map table and it's really amusing to look at each country and remember their person representation.  
Flying Mint Bunny you are adorable! :D**

You bloody couldn't anyway – I have special guards on all the possible residences for myself or my royal family. And at bloody Downing Street.

Humph. I heard that.  
_I totally am! He was such a sweet child!_

What sort of tea… Earl Grey and watermelon is very good, although good old English Breakfast Tea will always win. _(the author says this is her personal opinion, and not necessarily representative of her country)_

Sport… Cricket, although there is a lot of controversy at the moment. Football is the chosen sport of my people, although rugby comes a close second… Cricket is by far the most gentile sport, of course.

Not another bloody one.

_You're welcome! BYE!_

* * *

**Puttylol  
Naw, I don't want a scone... Unless you put a lot of sugar on it :v**

Also do you like K-Pop? It is pretty popular in England. ㅇㅁㅇ

As much sugar as would be necessary – desert scones have sugar, although savoury ones, such as cheese, should have none.

And what the bloody hell is 'K-Pop'?

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**Toni: No, It's ok Flying Mint Bunny! My Onii-chan wanted to go to Scotland and Ireland, too, so Thank you!  
London: Why would you want to go there?  
Toni: Be nice! And it's my onii-chan we're talking about...he's just a touch mental.  
London: So are you...  
Toni: NOT. AWESOME. LONDON.  
London: *smirks*  
Toni: Thanks, England!  
London: Seriously though...you are a touch mental.  
Toni: ARE NOT!  
London: ...you spent a whole week in your lab living off milk and Nabisco Crackers like Nikola Tesla...  
Toni: Tesla is awesome! And you know how well that week went! Answer-NOT WELL AT ALL. IT SUCKED. Which is why I spent it in my woman-cave!  
London: Fine. I still think you're a touch mental, though...don't you agree, England onii?  
Toni: Hmph.  
London: Bye, onii-chan!**

Logging off,

Toni Stark and Victoria Kirkland

_Ah, no. York's still in England, silly._

Hah! You show your uncle, London!

You are both very welcome. And am I sure there is no normality…

Good bye.

_BYE!_

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**The Paralympics, huh? It's a nice opportunity for the handicapped to participate in sports as well. It's good it was created.**

Awww! Will your bruders come back again? I think you could be an enjoyable group or something. No offense, of course.

Why hello there, Flying Mint Bunny!

Ahaha! N-No no, it's certainly nothing at all! It was just your brothers! Your brothers! Not my fault!  
Ahh...But Scotland is in the north of England, right? Am I right? Then if he gets independent, IF okay. IF only.  
Then the UK gets divided? A part cut off or something?

Ah...España and Portugal...Si, they do bicker a lot.

I understand the feeling. But life's boring without them, I guess.

Well then, until next time, Great Britain!

Ah, good afternoon.

And quite so, it is just a little difficult with all the 2Ps staying in your capital for a few weeks. They participate under… Well, in the same way we represent our own countries in the normal Olympics.

The first Paralympics were hosted in my country, you now?

My brothers? I imagine they will be back sooner or later… If not before then for bloody New Year. And they are not damn enjoyable when you're related.

_HI!_

Of what are we discussing? If it was you who let Hong Kong into the Government library…

Yes. That is true. Culturally, however, the four areas are already divided, and we play separately at certain sports. The area which is Scotland is already clearly defined.  
I don't know if I want him to have his bloody independence or not.

Boring? It would be a lot more bloody peaceful.

_See ya!_

You. See you, not see ya.

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**Hi again!  
I'm actually never whatched a Shakespeare's play...  
so Flying Mint Bunny really don't remember me...I feel like Canada :( at least Uni remember! I love you Uni and does it means that you remember Canada as well?  
so England who is your favorite nation (aside of you...)?  
LOVE YOU  
P.S- China is sooooooooo old! but don't tell him I saied it...he will get mad!  
and my contry is young but it did been through a lot of things...**

Good afternoon to you,  
Before we begin, 'watched' not 'whatched', 'favourite' not 'favorite', 'said' not 'saied' and 'country' not 'contry'.

_Don't worry! You'll get the hang of it someday!_

_Canada…? I'll ask uni! He's in the garden right now…_

_…_

_Uni says 'who?'_

I'm not anything bloody special… Favourite nation… Japan makes the next best tea, and his company is not unpleasant.

_Agreed!_

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall  
Your Flying Mint Bunny isn't very nice to me or the others, I'm sure it is a cutie(yeah I call you cute problem needed to be solved)!**

I'm sorry for calling your mum, mom, excuse me for being an American! You got some serious sibling rivalry at its finest with your brothers, none of them like you even if pretend. He use to be adorable? You were at a time sexy and handsome(those pirate days, sir). Yes, you were right, my country was adorable(well he is my country, duh)!

The American Civil War, he has been through trouble times, my poor sweet country! Anyway since you "don't care about him" then me saying this serves no purpose in continuing.

Your mommy has shocking red hair and is a tsundere(you get it from your momma). Stopped being a pirate when your ship "broke down", yet FMB said something about colonies!

1) Which bloody family did you have to look after?

Aww you are such a gentleman. I think you should try to mingle with the ladies, Arthur, you will come across a beautiful and refine woman(you need an equal).

2) What do you LOOK for in a woman far as appearance, behavior, and personality?

3) You don't remember your mother, but how did you over come the recipe for your scones?

Excuse my beloved country, he may call you old, but he is old as well regardless his appearance. Look at it this way, the continents are much older then, there is Pangaea and next is earth plus the universe too. Thank goodness for your appearance! I am envious(Human wise) that you are older than me, that is okay(I'll be twenty-two sooner than later ). I'm done rambling on about ages and stuff.

Seriously though you do need AA, because a gentleman like you needs to have class. Classy men do not behave in such a manner. Learn how to hold your liquor or give up on drinking period.

I am taking my leave, I will be back to ask even more questions for you!  
Hey, writer, I love your dedication, awesomeness, and kindness. Thank you for rocking!

(_) Goodbye!

_I'm as nice as I need to be. You're too nosey to be up to any good._

Please excuse her until the end of this… And then we will see if she can continue watching you.

Being American is no excuse for poor language use. They spent our childhood trying to bloody kill me.

I said used to be. He's now a bloody, insolent, idiotic git.

We do not talk about that.

Bunny…

_*nervous laugh* Sorry…_

1) Bloody family? I was an Empire! I had bloody colonies to look after! In America, the West Indies, India, East Indies, Africa, Caribbean… _(the author notes that she isn't sure what date he STOPPED being a pirate, so we're going with places he had colonies by the act of union). _I still have fourteen to look after.

2) She must be intelligent, drink tea, properly acting on most accounts, willing to have no permanent home and to not see me for long periods of time. She must be able to deal with any members of my family (former or current) who invade for a visit, know the proper way to treat royalty, and be willing to entertain guests. And, preferably, not die before me.

3) Scones were no eat by the time my mother bloody disappeared. One of the women who looked after me whilst I was still young taught me.

I do not have a bloody drinking problem!

Good bye.

_Yep. I'm still watching you._

_(The author says thanks, and sorry if this gets slower – I'm back to sixth form on Wednesday, so I'll have real work)_

* * *

**Rizu Roraito**

**(As me:)**

Oh, thanks! :D

(As Spain:)

Oh, and I would love to play a partido de futbol (game of soccer/football) with you sometime! When are you free? :D

You're welcome.

_One moment, please! He's finding his diary…_

You're on. Saturday week, 10AM your time?

* * *

**Sophia Griffin  
Aw, come oooooooon I know you like being called Iggy! XD**

And America is right about you guys being OLD. I'm only in my nineties! And America is... Somewhere in the 200's or something .

And I'm bloody well glad that the symtoms don't kick in yet O-O Almost dying is PAINFUL DX

I hope you can fly soon! I miss you Flying (or not so much flying) Mint Bunny!

I keep forgetting to sign this XDD

Marcia, Country of Saphira

Do not bloody call me that!

I'm the only one who's old… And you're old, too!

_Seconded! Especially by Welsmen…*shiver* But I'm good now! I can fly, too!_

I know who you are anyway,  
Britain.

* * *

**EnterTheDarkSide  
Another grettings from the Darkside, cookie?  
I know you don't want any, but it's kind of what I must do...**

Sorry for the late reply, I was in M. America's house for a couple of days. He's quite entertaining when you look past his annoying traits... And know what buttons to push

Not one for French? Would you then prefer Gaelic, MAIGHSTIR England?

That is a good story! There are a few mermaid stories over here, but I'll tell you something different:

The Dungarvon Whooper- There was once a lumber camp in Dungarvon woods, in the province of New Brunswick. One notable figure was the cook. He was right nice, could give quite a whoop (yell), and a good cook. Another thing; he always carried a big money belt with him, it was said that he was saving it up for his future wife.  
Anyway, it was always the same: he'd rise up way early in the morning, make the food, wake up the lumber men with his whooping (usually 3 whoops), they'd eat, leave for work, he'd make lunch, they'd eat then leave, he'd make supper, etc.  
Another figure in this story was the manager, who's character was almost contrast to the cook's; an unfriendly, cheap, skin-flint. No one was surprised when they caught him eyeing the Cook's money belt.  
It was just like any other day, except the manager decided to stay at the cabins, where the Cook was. No one gave much thought into it, until they came back; they found the Cook's body in the kitchen, head all bloody and money belt gone. The Manager told them that the Cook simply fell and hit his head, but everyone knew what really happened, but no guts to say it. Nonetheless, they buried the Cook out in the snow.  
When everyone came back, they noticed the Manager was fidgiting and nervous. That's when they heard it: A horrible whooping sound. Everyone was paralised. Another whoop. The Manager started getting anxious and mumbled to himself. By the third whoop, the Manager dropped. Dead.  
They buried him on top of the supposed grave of the Cook. The money belt was never found, and no one knows where those graves are. After that, people stopped going into Dungarvon woods, unable to stand the horrible whooping, whch is said to come in 3s. A priest once came by to help settle the spirits, but people today still claim to hear the whoops whenever they venture into Dungarvon woods.

That was a tad long... There are actually a few versions to this story, atleast one where it's the Manager being the victim and the Cook the murderer, but this version in more well-known.

Your correct! The answer is a mirror, but the other two guesses were quite good.

Sincerely,  
- The Darkside

P.S- If M. America comes to you yelling about nightmares, ghosts, cookies, darkness and such, well... hehe... I tried not to traumatize him TOO much.

No, I do not want a damn cookie, whatever one is!

I cannot say I am concerned about him.

Gaelic is preferable to the language of the bloody frog.

Interesting… And it was not a bloody mermaid. They were Asrai, a species which dies upon human contact, and also n sunlight. They live in freshwater lakes, and only appear once every thousand years to dance under the full moon.

You told me mermaid stories were common then gave me a ghost story?

Well, thank you.

_(the author says thanks, she feels clever now! She spent all evening thinking of these over my embroidery)_

Oh, what the bloody he did you do to him?

_Guess where he'll be going this evening…_

* * *

**Nameless Naridam**

**Ah, I see. Well then, Iggirisu-san, what kind of people do you prefer to be around with? Calm gentlemen like Nihon (Japan) or energetic gentlemen like America? I do not really have a perference...Oh! And Flying Mint Bunny, do you prefer certain people?**

One last thing: You better watch out Iggirisu-San I'm not telling you what it is though!

Sayonara

Japan does possibly give the best company. And the fae folk that live at his house are also reakable!

_Me? I like fun people who can see me! Well… Anyone who can see me and doesn't hurt me… So, Britain and Norway!_

Oh, bloody hell. I'll go collect the post…

* * *

**SeaTheRedJoker  
Hi there Arthur! :D It's totally awesome that you've mad a blog too! So here's my questions...  
I'm British and American. How does that happen?  
And what do you think of USUK?  
That's all...for now.  
BAI BAI!**

_Heya!_

Hello.

It happens when a British person and an America person love each other very much, they go to bed with one another, and the woman ends up pregnant.

It's a bloody awful idea. Why would I feel attracted to the git! And to kiss my brother!

_Ooh… Sounds ominous!_

* * *

**MR MAN **

**HEY TERE JERK FACE ARTUR!  
I BET U DNT NO WHAT THIS IS! TEEHEE!  
WELL, UR A JURK FACE AND U SMELL BAAAAAD!  
Hehe! Loozer!  
ONE DAY ULL BE MINE!  
ULL BOW DOWN TO MEE!  
BUH BYE JERK INGLAND!  
-IM A COUNTRY JURK!**

Hello Sealand.

_(The author is making an assumption here)_

You are not a country, and aren't you supposed to be at the meeting of micro-nations?

_He's trying really hard not to swear at you, Sea. I think you're cute!_

You're not damn helping Flying Mint Bunny!

_Who said I was trying to?_

* * *

_(The author would like to apologise for how long this took, but says it will become normal as school is coming up. Also… Some of yu have been separately informed, but if you wish to look up why it is relivant, I'm taking questions for September 19__th__ to my inbox, as well as the comments from the post before. I'm not sure how many that will be, and it is up to you to work out the relevance. If you wish to tak advantage of this date, please put 'September 19__th__' in the subject bar, or if you are one of the anons, put it as the first line of a review. Thanks and bye!)_


	8. Chapter 8 le Tour, Las Vesta, the TOUR

_(Before we begin, I REALLY would like something to play with on September 19__th__. Other than the usual. Also, you get this chapter in which you can send comments by review, then they MUST be sent by PM. Any which are sent by review this chapter will receive a notification of this, incase you don't read notes. Beyond that, I reserve the right to ignore the reviews entirely. The brothers will be back either next update, or the one after the 19__th__, depending on which I reach first.)_

* * *

The bloody frog came to visit earlier this week, and took up residence in my bathroom. As such, I have been unable to comment.

_Yeah, not to mention your internet fails in dry weather!_

There's nothing wrong with my internet, or my weather.

Anyway, I am expecting that I will have 'guests' again, soon. Northern Ireland has requested some questions of his own, whilst the other bloody idiots have hinted it.

_We all need to go give France a slapping, as he left his underwear here. 'Kay?_

You're not supposed to bloody admit to that.

_I just did! *giggle*_

And you had all better watch the Tour of Britain!

_It's a cycling race and REALLY boring. Don't feel you need to, da?_

Flying Mint Bunny! You turned Russian! And against me...

_Don't cry... Oh, good. You're shouting again. And I was only pretending..._

* * *

**Greece's kitty  
2p greece:*watches me kill you*STUPID BRITISH BASTARD!THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR STEALING MY STATUES!  
Me:TAKE THE KITTY!*drops kitty on iggys face*  
kitty:(the cat not me) *starys clawing out iggys eyes***

I am not a bastard, git. Countris have special rules in that matter. And I did not 'steal' your stautes. It's a bloody long term loan without payment.

_*hiss* I don't like you… Or this… Magic flower!_

Thank you, Flying Mint Bunny. Bloody cats. You shouldn't dare mess with the British Empire!

_Or his friends!_

_(the author would like to make clear that this spell has destroyed the cat. Please respond as necessary)_

* * *

**IamTheAwesomePrussiaAndDenma rk**

**England! How are you the awesome us came to say hallo! How is everything at the less awesome England? Anyway, c yah**

Hello, idiots.  
I am not less bloody awesome – at least I have a country. And anyhow, it is sunny, 28 degrees C and all is perfect. You had better send some bloody good cyclists for the tour this year.

_Right… Everyone gets high, and it's so BORING, eve when there are decent riders…_

Cycling is not boring, Bunny!

_If you say so…_

* * *

**Red-Tulips-Are-Awesome**

**Hmm..hum...hm...  
Well...England, it doesn't necessarily have to be 'favourite.' My spell check actually says that is the incorrect spelling. Because over here in the great ole' USA we spell it 'favorite.'  
And...do you know how the hell are you supposed to pronounce the word, 'herb?' I always pronounce it with a 'ha- sound', not with a silent 'h'. But all of my teachers keep saying it's pronounced with a silent 'h'. I don't believe them.  
Don't you think that rabbits are adorable? I have two of them of my own. And they are sooo cute, but they cause a lot of trouble. xD  
Ah, and is there any pets you would like to have besides your magical friends?  
Well, that's all. Thank you for answering this.**

_(the author notes that this is the case, although her American spell check also says it's wrong. She'll add it to her dictionary of English-American. No further comment will be made by her on this matter)_

Well, you should spell things bloody properly, then.

Say it with a silent 'h' in my country and you'll sound like a bloody peasant. But I's not 'harb' either – unless you're blood American. If you want to speak in Queen's English, as I assume you are asking me about (it's the bloody best English, if you ask me) then it is 'huh-erb' (phonetically, hurb).

…

_He used to have a real rabbit. She died._

Thank you for being so blunt.

_You've still got me!_

Aye. And you're just as bloody troublesome.

_HEY!_

Another pet? I used to have a lion. And some elephants. And a tiger... I would not bloody do that again, though.

You are welcome.

_See ya!_

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**Toni: Yes, I know! I just meant we'll probably be going up the island to there instead of flying there, so we can go to York along the way.  
London: Hah! I knew you Starks were a touch mental! Of course I will, England!  
Toni: I'M NOT A TOUCH MENTAL! Genius requires sacrifice!  
London: Are you quoting Tesla again?  
Toni: I think it's Tesla. I'm not sure.  
London: Did you see the premier of Doctor Who? I loved it!  
Toni: ...we were silently fangirling through the whole episode together.  
London: You were, I wasn't.  
Toni: Lies. All right...bye, England! Until next time!**

Assemble (My Onii-chan and his friends are visiting Toni)

Antonia Stark and Victoria Kirkland!

Understood. And I did, although we call it a first episode. It was bloody brilliant!

_*giggle* touch mental? That's generous_

_(the author suggests we can get together and fan-girl over this together sometime?)_

*sigh* Will I be seeing you for dinner next Tuesday, London?

* * *

**Sophia Griffin**

**. I know iM OLD BUT IN- oh bloody hell caps lock!- copariosn, you're really old XD**

And you know, I was raised in America, with America, so... I'm going to keep calling you Iggy, father! XDD

Welsman? What? O-o I feel really stupid for not knowing what that is lol

Ennnnnngland, can I help you make scones without burning them...?

And I know you know who I am! :P

We're all bloody old – we're nations, git.

I'm not that old, git!

…

_Hey, doesn't that make Rome your great granddad?_

_(Oops… The author thinks she may have missed a letter – Welshman. Meaning a person from Wales)_

Welshman. As in bloody Wales.

Of course I can. When are you free, and I'll come teach you how to make proper scones! But call me by my proper damn name, and stop bloody whining!

* * *

**Alfred and Mattie**

**I don't even know what insolent means. Pssh. Meanie.  
...I totally did make you blush.  
pfft, you so are a girl. Maybe not physically but definitely mentally.  
O-oh... I-I made you cry?  
I'm sorry dude. Seriously. I didn't mean to make you cry...  
...Does wittle Engwand need a hug? I SHALL GIVE YOU A HUG! I'M FLYING TO YOUR HOUSE SOON TO GIVE YOU A GODDAMN HUG AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME! HAHA!  
Well, buh bye, England dude!  
Ps: WHY THE HELL CAN'T YOU REMEMBER CANADA. CANADA IS MY BRO. And YOURS as well! Remember!  
Or I shall learn hypnotism and hypnotize you too! Haha!  
Buh bye  
PPS: Your 2p is awesomer. Justsayin.**

Insolent: adjective; showing a rude and arrogant lack of respect. Idiot.

I did not bloody blush and I am not a damn girl! Don't listen to the bloody frog! He's polluting your mind with damned lies, although you wouldn't bloody know the difference, git.

I do not want a bloody hug from you!

_I won't let you near him… I will NOT LET YOU NEAR HIM AGAIN!_

…

The nice blonde one who I stole from the frog?

No wonder he bloody beat me at basketball, if he's your damned brother. Say hello to him.

* * *

**MR MAN **

**Howd u find out its me jurk?  
ARE U STAKING ME?!  
AAAH! PEDO! PEDO!  
DNT STAWK ME!  
But no. Dey kiked me out! Jurks...  
Tank u fling mint bunny! BUT IM NOT CUTE! IM SEXAY!**

Sealand, go back to your studying. You're supposed to be at bloody school. I do not see how Sweden lets you get away with this bloody nonsense.

_I'm not a pedophile, if I am doing it to protect someone. You're weird._

You are not bloody sexy, Sealand. That is inappropriate for one of your physical age.

And it's not that hard to work out, idiot.

* * *

**Rizu Roraito**

**Okay!**

It's on! I'll beat you and your team!

Ay, y do you like the food I serve at my place?

-Spain

You will never beat me!

It's too bloody fancy, but better than the frog's.

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**wooow... I feel like Matthiew...  
I'll ask a question though... Do you like France or America?  
and WHY is your food disgusting?**

Matthiew? What's that. Some bloody unholy cross between the French and my own people?

The frog has no qualities worth mentioning, as a bloody perverted moron. America is an ungrateful, insolent brat.

_What he means to say is that he's sore with France about some very dirty dealings and bad events in the very early middle ages, and wishes America would be nicer to him, but is upset about a certain war._

Bloody shut up, Flying Mint Bunny!

My food is damn brilliant.

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello!  
I went to the zoo for the first time last weekend and I really liked the butterflies (go figure), seals and the penguins. How ever some animals were very smelly. I also noticed that there were a lot of British, English and Scottish people there.  
By the way my friend really likes Irish accents, she wants to go to Ireland because of it. -_-  
I've never actually had watermelon tea, I might try it when I run out of tea.  
Question:  
Did you cry when William and Kate get married?  
How does a nation know it's a nation? Your mum might have told you but what about her mum and how did Pangaea know? How did he/she get the connection with the land?  
Bye bye I've got three tests to study for? :P**

Animals can't clean themselves, so of course they're smelly.

English and Scottish people are British. And there's many sorts of bloody Irish accents, just like there are many English and Scottish ones.

Not watermelon tea, watermelon in tea.

No, I bloody did not. I'm not a woman.

_*giggle* I didn't… He did!_

Bunny! Bloody heck…

_Oh, I'll do this! Nations are automatically connected to their land! Any other nation can sense them, and they are not 'born' like people. They appear when the land develops enough to be considered a country, or micro-nation. If they're too dense to feel it when they are born *cough-Spain-cough* another nation will normally invade them, or they'll notice when they don't grow old!_

You sounded bloody clever than.

_*smile* Thanks!_

Humph. Well, you should be bloody studying, then.

* * *

**Puttylol**

**Hmm i should try a savory scone then..**

GASP OMG! KPOP? KOREAN POP MUSIC?

Eh? Super junior" sorry sorry?"

Cheese would be recommended in that category.

I cannot say I have ever listened to any Korean music, and what?

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Hello.**

The 2Ps are coming?! ...I see.

Of course, I had assumed as such.

Wales is a pretty amusing individual, and so is Scotland, Northern Ireland, and Eire.

No, it was not me. Hong Kong barely knows me. Even though I did visit his place at some holidays...  
I was referring to...what your brothers said...You know...about...you and...France.

Oh, I understand...But what choice will benefit you the most?  
True. But amusing, nonetheless.

Bye Flying Mint Bunny and Britain!

I bloody hope not. They're supposed to be under armed guard in the Olympic park.

_Still there! Uni's on duty today, and they haven't escaped. J_

Amusing?! They're bloody annoying. They used to spend their free time trying to bloody kill me, and they probably still are plotting it.

Good. Whomever bloody let him in needs dealing with…  
_I've already told you – he let himself in, Albi.  
_Well, blast.

He'd be a bloody idiot to declare independence in the current economic state. I can't say I don't want him in my country, if only to keep bloody meeting vaguely resembling sanity.

Good bye.

_NIGHT!_

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

***Banging head on the table* My English is so bad! It is so bad that I'm going to die from the humiliation! I want to die :(  
My head hurts! I have once again a lot of homework! I need to tidy my room! I'm soo hungry! I wish I was'nt born at all! I don't want to exist anymore in this miserable world!**

...  
well...sorry...I ate momment ago and now I feel better...  
so even Uni don't rememcer Canada...I fell sorry for him! I mean I have developed suicidal tendencies just from being hungry but he still didn't break down after being invisible for all his life...such a sad story :(  
but why am I telling this to you? you don't evev remember who I am talking about...  
Anyway I need to go now! Sealand is waiting for me! We have a meeting about our plans to conquer England :)  
Oops...I wasn't supposed to say this...aren't I?  
Ahhh..please stop Flying Mint Bunny! I promise to not hurt England! Please forgive me! I won't conquer England!*coughasifIwillreallydoitcoug h*  
hahah...I didn't say nothing at all *nervous laugh*  
See you later :)

Well, sort it out then, love.

_Awww… Don't die! You're too cute!_

She's not bloody cute, Flying Mint Bunny! She's a proper lady!

_*shrugs* But she's nice._

America took it upon himself to bloody remind me… With a mallet. He's the little blonde one I stole from the damned frog, and mistake for bloody America.

_OHHH…. THAT ONE! He's nice. When I see him. _

_…_

_We'll both have forgotten by morning. *nervous giggle*_

Bloody Sealand. Why can't he just act like a normal colony.

_There's such thing as a normal colony?! WOW! This is news!_

Good night.

_NIGHT NIGHT!_


	9. International Talk Like a Pirate Day

_(Before we begin, the author would like to say that in pirate, wench just means young woman, 'kay?)_

* * *

Argh me hearties! Today be International Talk Like A Pirate day, so climb the riggin's, host the sails and drink some rum!

_If you REALLY wanted to know, Britain is sitting here in his old pirate outfit (and yes, that includes the hat and eye patch) laughing and shouting as he types._

What are you doing, wee scrawny rabbit.

_Hey Britain! I'm a Flying Mint Bunny! _

Ah, sorry matey! Let's set this ship afloat, and blast those damned Spaniards to kingdom come!

_… Aye aye, Ca'in?_

* * *

**The-goddamn-Iron-girl**

**London: GOD. *headdesks* I've spent too much time with this one. Sorry...  
Toni: Not that I don't mind.  
London: I WAS NOT FANGIRLING. THAT IS UNDIGNIFIED.  
Toni: Rright... ((YES! Fangirls unite! *DoctorWhoBrofist* Did you see the new episode, Dinosaurs on a Spaceship? I loved it!)) HEY! Flying Ming Bunny, why are you taking her side! I'm not mental!  
London: Yes you are, see you soon England nii-chan!  
Toni: I'm NOT! All right, bye! Doctor Who forever!**

Love you, nii-  
NIKOLA TESLA IS BADASS-  
chan- STOP INTERRUPTING ME, TONI!  
NEVER!

Antonia Stark and Victoria Kirkland (Toni/Iron Girl and London)

Argh, wench, ya should fear the mighty Lord of the oceans! And ya supposed to be helpin' with meriggings. Get down 'ere now!

_Personally, I think you're all mental. :) And fangirling._

* * *

**Greece's kitty **

**kitty: you killed nikos kitty!?*runs for dear life**  
2p greece:*eye twitch*...*eyes turn red*  
mytilini:*gets the popcorn*  
2p greece: actually, anglia, you took statues from athens and featured them in your museum. and nomatter how much my stupid counterpart asks for them back. you dont return them. i suppose ill have to resolve this problem my self.*cracks knucles* my, what fun this will be. hehehehehehehe...*starts beating up england *  
(iggy is actually one of my favorite characters, so im sorry i keep killing him in my comments)  
mytilini: hahahaha! *gives 2p greece chainsaw*  
2p greece:*sadistic smile* kolkolkolkolkolkolkolkol- sorry i belive my allie is rubbing off on me.**

BEGONE FOUL BEASTS AND NE'ER RETURN! ARRRGH!

_Oh, and he's running at you with THAT cutlass again. Fun times._

And walk the plank!

_*face plant* was that really necessary, captain._

Aye, it's always bloody necessary, first mate Bunny! Remember that!

* * *

**Sophia Griffin**

**:P I will not stop whining, because I can and it's fun to make ya mad XD**

Oh duh! Welshman! From Wales! derp. XD

Rome, my great granddad? Hmmmmmmm... I dunno I guess. How'd ya figure that out? Thinking about the family tree just gives me a serious (forgive my rude terminology) Mind Fuck XD Anyone who isn't a direct relative I don't think of as really related to me. Even though technically we're all related. :P

I also will usually never call you by your proper name, but I will stop calling you Iggy for the time being.

Don't call me a git, you idiot. . *mutters* I am not a git...

*back to normal* Ahem, uhm, yaaaaay scones! :D

Ahhhhhh this is so random -

Stop whining, you scurvy wench.

Where is that blighter?!

_Britain is currently mentally incapacitated, so I guess I'll answer. You call Britain Dad, Rome is the Grandfather/cradle of Europe, so he's your grandfather too!_

Extended family's a bugger. Sail out and make 'em walk the plank! Down with the Spaniards, me hearties!

My… Name… Is… Captain Kirkland! You will remember that, wench!

_It should probably be noted that he's pointing his cutlass at the fun with that!_

* * *

**Guest **

**England, Bunny, & England's brothers,**

Hello! My name is Leo et Lab, but you may call me Rachel instead. This is my first time on your blog, Arthur, but I'm enjoying myself; many of the comments are very entertaining! Anyways , I have some questions I would like to ask all of you...

To the one and only England: My aunt studied at the University of England a long time ago, so she knows quite a few recipes of yours. One of which she introduced to me and my family, a dessert called bread pudding? It was really delicious and I loved it truly, but why is it called bread pudding? And what other desserts do you have at your home? (Tip: If your brothers are visiting you, you should keep at least one window in the house open so that Flying Mint Bunny can escape to safety!)

Last, but definitely not least, Bunny: I'm so glad that you're feeling better! Wales certainly did a number on you from what it sounds like. I also have a few questions for you as well! Was taking care of Arthur hard work, especially with his brothers and France all around him (not to mention the viking attacks)? Have you ever met Wales' dragon, and if so, what is he/she like?

Best wishes,  
Rachel  
LeL

_(The author states before we start, I'm saving the rest of this for when the brothers bring sanity back next chapter.)_

Glad to see you're enjoying my blog, wench. Now come 'elp me with me ship. We're sailing to the New World via Spain! Man the cannons and draw on the reserves!

Ya start with bread, ya stupid woman. Rip up the bread and add the rest! Ya making me hungry for foreign blood! But, aye, we have desserts. Eaton Mess, Spotted Dick, crumbles and trifle! All served with custard!

_Is it just me, or is there something REALLY odd about a pirate giving dessert advice to some random stranger via internet. And THAT is a good idea. I'll tell him in the morning, thanks!_

_Thank you! Unfortuantly, there's another conference coming up soon… :( Britain's always hard work, but so cute._

I heard that, rabbit.

_Aye, cap'in. The dragon is scary, and so many invasion! *cries* with them and the civil wars, he was always hurt… _

Stop crying, wench-rabbit. Today be fun!

_Aye, aye cap'in. *sigh* How long does this go on for… -_-_

* * *

**Springirth Dale **

**Aha.  
It's him...It's okay, I can understand why you weren't able to update.**

Woah...2Ps are dangerous...

Well uhh...yeah. Sorry...For some reason, I like your siblings.

...He is just that clever.  
I think he's...at the airport and currently deciding on who to visit *cough*whotomesswith*cough*...  
And maybe he'd visit your place. So I just warned you just in case.

Ahh...Then what do you think about Wales?

Goodbye.

P.S. Flying Mint Bunny, you're cute!

I'll destroy that bloody frog after I've dealt with that Spaniard and his petty armarda…

_*manic laughter on Britian's part* Wow… This is new._

They'll walk the plank and never see thar light of day!

Hong Kong…

_*he's grinning evilly* … I'd really watch out for traps, if I were you. Use the second floor windows – he always forgets them, and forgets what he's set when he gets like this._

Wales is the bastard child of a once great woman! I'll pound his face into the dust!

_Thanks… *nervous laugh* Oh, Britain… I've seen you cry over your brothers being so cruel, and then you go do this…_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello England! :D  
Sorry for messing up the names.. :P  
Watermelon in tea? I'll try that one day.  
Anyway it's actually sometimes gets colder here then in England. Who would have though? The temperature generally fluctuates in the afternoon. In the mornings it is very cold. The highest it's been in the past few days is 24 degrees (this is in Melbourne, I can't speak for the others) even though it's spring here and Autumn (am I right?) in England. In Canberra they have been getting some negative temperatures. :(  
I was watching the news and apparently in Australia we have kangaroos jumping on the streets.  
Well for the tests I found out that I actually had 4. I think I did alright on the Chinese one, not too bad on the maths, okay in science and alright in the English ones (it's a writing task so it depends of the teacher finds my story interesting and for the other one a good argument). But I can't really say anything until I get the results back.  
I though I rarely used Australian slang but I do, things like calling McDonald's Maccas and I call jandel's thongs. Apart from those I don't really use any other Australian slang terms. I actually recently found out that 'fair dinkum' means true, real or genuine. I don't have much of an accent either neither do my friends.  
Bye bye! (sorry this is so long) :{D**

Argh, wench. If ya were a man ya'd be drinking rum in ya tea!

_And that's a REALLY good idea… NOT!_

The changes are hazy, and I know that, wench! I've sailed all the seven seas on me good ship Lady Jane!

Arrgh, tests. Join the pirates, and never sit another! And they al speak funny thar!

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

***Rings doorbell then runs to hid behind bushes. England walks out looking around to see, who rang the door bell. Stands up and throws the first egg***

ATTACK! LET'S WASTE THIS FOOL! *starts fucking England up with eggs, toilet paper, and hamburgers* DUDES, GET THE FLOUR AND CHOCOLATE SYRUP *throws flour on England then pour on the syrup*

YEAH, THAT IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, *grabs Flying Mint Bunny, covers her in chocolate and flour*  
PRUSSIA, DENMARK, LET'S RUN LIKE HELL! *all at the same time* FUCK YOU ENGLAND *then laughs while running away*

To the writer, thank you and see ya! * watches England try to catch up but he ends up falling*

You'll pay for that, wench…

_Yuck! All sticky!_

Oh, looks like I'm commentating.  
Well, Britain is now on his feet, chasing you with his cutlass and pistol! He's shooting at Prussia and Denmark, and has caught up by swinging though the trees! He's used his cutlass to pin Prussia to a tree, and has shot Denmark in the foot! Now, he's running at him, and knocks him unconscious with a well aimed blow to the head! Watch out, Qua! He's coming for you, and pulling rope from his bag! In one swift movement, he ties you to a tree, and walks off.

_Total victory to the blue corner!_

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**HI THERE!  
I actually have nothing to say...it's like writer's block but only a reader's block...  
so just..I don't know..tell me funny stories about other countries? or write random things to me...  
so...byebye...**

Well, heartie. There was this one time when Prussia and I were sailing the Caspian Sea, lookin' for Spain and the frog. Now, on this trip we ran out of rum. So, we stopped off in Russia for some. Russia is a big country, but we found that asleep country on the shore, ripped off his coat and took his vodka! He didn't see us, and didn't chase. Nobody ever caught us, and we still 'ave the bottles to prove it!

_So that's where you went. Your mother would be horrified. And HOW did you get the Lady Jane to the Caspian sea?! It's INLAND!_

_(the author says no, she does not know where this came from either)_

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggghh hhhhhhhttt... your food is brilliant...  
Fine Mr. "my food is brilliant". tell me.  
Do you or do you not like sherlock holmes?  
He's british right?**

Louse infested biscuits, aye? Come hither to the Good Ship Lady Jane, and let ma teach ya 'bout good food!

Aye, what of 'im?

_Normally, Britain would be obsessing. You caught him at a bad time, it seems. Sorry._

* * *

**Bodesciakirkland**

**Hello! England it been a long time since I've seen little pup. It's your beloved mummsie, who has come to see you. Don't get so lovey dovey with me either...all I did was want to check on my sweetie. Mummsie has questions for you.**

1. What have you been up to exactly and who is this rumor adopted son/brother of yours?

2. How are your brothers, my scones recipe, and your magic going along?

3. Are you dating any one right now...if so you will let me know about her...right?

4. Have you been worried about your sweet mummy...well have you?

I really miss you though. I hope you get back to me because I worry about you and your brothers all the time. I am so sorry for not being near you during certain times. Please forgive your dear mummy.

Argh, it's nay… What the bloody hell are you doing here?!

_His Mrs Britannia! It seems you've managed to get him out of pirate mode for a few moments, so congratulations!_

I don't need checking on. I'm not a bloody infant.

He's no brother of mine. He stopped being so when he betrayed me.  
_He's had… 235? Think that's right. Of which were you asking, and I'll pass the message on when he's not crying._

…

…

_He's stopped now, but I'll give it a few hours. He's back to pirate, right, cap'in?_

Aye, aye, First Mate Bunny! The boys are coming for rum and scones next week, ya can ask 'em then! Ma magic's on hald whilst I deal with the Spaniard and the Frog, but it's good.

There was one wench I saw about 400-450 years 'go. She was a creep, sayin' we war married when we warn't.

'Course I haven't, mamá.

_Great, you've gone through pirate, post-revolutionary, normal and now you're on French. He was really worried for a while, but was then occupied with being beaten up. You called at a bad time. Sorry, Miss! And I'm sure he forgives you… *glares at him*_

* * *

Watch out Spaniard! Captain Kirkland is on your case!

* * *

_(the author says… No, I do not know what happened. Prussians and Danes were harmed in the making of this post, as well as the occasional reviewer. Next time, the brothers are on._

_(Oh, and the person who can find my historical reference (it appears multiple times) which is not directly concerned with war, battles, the revolutionary war or rivalries AND the reference to a video game, giving me the historical event/period, and the name of the series the game is from can have a prize… Not thought of one yet._

_(And remember, I cannot promise that any submitted by review end up in the chapter_

_(Next time: the brothers are back with vengeance)._


	10. Post the 10th

Who's who:

England

_Flying Mint Bunny_

**Scotland**

**_Wales_**

_Romania_

**_N. Ireland_**

Eire

* * *

Good afternoon.

**_What ya doing...?_**

**_Helo ;)_**

**Feasgar math**

Dia dhuit

Please excuse them.

**Oi, laddie. We don't need excusing.**

Shut up!

**_They only said good afternoon_**

…

They should bloody translate themselves!

**You need to loosen up, boyo. Need I remind you…**

**_I could always do it… ;)_**

I'm quite alright.

**_A pity… Where did your flying friend go?_**

Far away from you.

**_You're so cruel._**

**_Um… I think you're more nasty, Welshie. But you're funny, too!_**

**_*glare*_**

**Flying friend?**

Flying Mint Bunny, of course

**Oh, THIS again.**

You bloody asked!

We met to discuss nation matters earlier, and now we're camping out at Eggylet's. If they don't want me to blow them up, they had better finish this relatively quickly.

It's ENGLAND!

**_You're mean, bug brother!_**

Bug brother?

**_Oopsie… Big Brother! You're all mean, but I love you!_**

**Who let the Netherlands near his tea?**

**_Who's ya think?_**

**_…_**

Whilst they fight that out…

_*meanwhile, in Romania!*_

_I'm here at Romania's where Wales can't get me! He's let me use the computer, and now I'm 'sharing' Iggy's account! :)_

* * *

**Greece's kitty **

**kitty: oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooh pirate~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*glomps iggy*  
2p greece:*army uniform* NEVER~*aims bazzoka at iggys head***

*raises eyebrow* Well, well, what have we here?

**Oi! Only I'm allowed to do that!**

Normally, you use a spear, though. I use the bazzoka.

**_Eire! Why does he want to hurt brother England?_**

I'll explain later.

**_But I want to know NOW!_**

**_England p***ed him off, and is now paying. Have you seen any fairies around here?_**

**_Err… Nope. No fairies!_**

**_Too bad… ;(_**

* * *

**Alfred and Mattie **

**I TOTALLY DIDN'T REVIEW TO EYEBROW'S BLOG. O: Naah, I was probably being to awesome and **. NOW, I'VE GOT SOME COMPLAINTS, BRITAIN!  
1. I was listening to that one song you sang .. Pub and Go or something like that and I totally didn't appreciate you calling me an idiot and a wanker at the end. -_- Not cool. And why did you sing a song about getting drunk and cursing people...?  
2. I DO NOT LIKE YOU COMING OVER TO MY LAND WITH ALL OF YOUR BRITISH CRAP AND MY PEOPLE GUSHING "OOOH! BRITISH ACCENTS~ *Swoons*" Not cool. -_-  
3. ...Fruk is amazing.  
4. I'm hotter than you'll evar be old man! Haha!  
5. I saw this British show called "Supersized vs Superskinny" AND DUDE. YOUR PEOPLE ARE HUUUUGE COMPARED TO MINE! And waaay to small.  
And what's with your obsession with staring at my 'bum'?  
Bye bye Eyebrows~**

What do you want, America?

**Be nice to him, boyo.**

Make.. On second thoughts, I'm not being bloody nice to him!

1) You are a bloody idiot, so deal with it.

**_All they do is get drunk and swear, dim?_**

**_No… That's all Eire and me do! Oh, wait… We gamble, too!_**

North, what have I told yo about that?

**_Oh, wait. I'm not allowed to talk about that, 'cause I'm underage. :)_**

Shut the blummin 'eck up!

2) I'll stop doing it to you when you stop bloody doing it to me!

**_Yeah. I don't like the American silly people coming, either._**

3) You insolent, incompetent, American git! I bloody better raised you than to-!

And there he goes again.

4) **_Well, everyone else is cussing you, so I'll say I agree! I'm younger than you, so that's fine. :) Err… My age is kinda complicated, actually. But I'm young as an official home nation!_**

5) *eye roll* thank you, North. We're not all that bloody fat, idiot. That's the extremes of my people. Most of us are built perfectly healthily.

**Even mine, before you start, lad.**

If stare at your rear end, it is simply because I am trying to comprehend how it is so large.

Git.

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl **

**Toni: *laughing and nosebleeding* Pirate!England...omg... *holds tissue to nose*  
London: O_O Stop nosebleeding over my brother!  
Toni: What? No. I have a cold. Remember, *my* brother gave me a cold? Colds make me nosebleed easily.  
London: Watching. You.  
Toni: *sweatdrops* Right. Anyway...FLYING MINT BUNNY! THE HECK!? Why are you so mean to me!? T_T I believe in you!  
London: She's dramatic.  
Toni: England. I have something to say, and I hope it doesn't hurt too badly or anything. But...America's lucky that you were so good to him, because believe me, things could have been worse. My father...*looks down* he... he wasn't the best person, despite what people say otherwise. He was a harsh person.  
Male voice in background: Kid. Get serious. He was cold, calculating, never told me he loved me, didn't even tell me that he liked me. You're talking about a man who's happiest day of his life was shipping me off to boarding school.  
Toni: Thank you for phrasing that for me, nii-chan. And he was worse to me than he was to you...insults and all...  
Male voice in background: No problem.  
London: Yes, my brothers, this is the sensitive Stark nerve. Don't ever touch it, unless you have a death wish. It is quite volatile, and will likely explode at random moments, when seemingly innocuous phrases bring back bad memories.  
Toni: T_T Stop ruining the moment, Vikki.  
London: That. Is. Not. My. Name. It's VICTORIA!  
Toni: Whatevs~ That's what you get for messing with the serious moment~  
London: *headdesk* See you later, big brothers...  
Toni: Until next time!**

Nikola Tesla is badass, (Hah! Got MY signature this time,, London! London: Hmph.)

Antonia Stark and Victoria Kirkland (Toni and London)

_I'm NOT mean to you!_

**_Scotty, why does she have a nosebleed?_**

She's a pervert.

**Republic of Ireland! What language is that?!**

**_Proper one?_**

Please stop filling North's head with dirty images.

Not my issue.

Actually, you're the one with land borders with him.

**_Eire! Let's go find out why she has a nosebleed!_**

…

**He told you so, laddie.**

**_BYE BIG NIECE!_**

**_?!... Eggy. Where did your bunny go? I want to carve pretty patterns in its wings…_**

Away from bloody you.

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Pirate England! Yahooooo!**

COOL!

Unfortunately, I'm not so...familiar with "pirate speak".

YES! Long live the British Empire! (^o^)

What's new? ? o(OvO)o ?

To tell you the truth, I actually "freaked out" for approximately 11 seconds when your brothers are going to be coming back.

Okay...But Flying Mint Bunny, how long have you been with Britain?

No problem.  
I kind of do that too...

Sooooo...Uh...Hey, England's brothers!  
Ahahaha...I don't know what to talk about-! (-v-") Sorry...I'm just uhh...speechless?  
I guess I can ask you some questions..? Fine, I'll do that.

Mr. Scotland, just how much do you hate England? I think England's just fine. What's wrong with him? (o.O)

Mr. Wales, why are you interested in Flying Mint Bunny, unicorns, and other magical creatures?

Mr. Eire, do you also hate your brothers? I wonder why all of you hate each other.

Mr. Northern Ireland, who of your brothers do you think is um..more "tolerable"?

Mr. England! I hope you're doing fine, and I hope you're not stressed out.

Flying Mint Bunny, please take care of England! And please take care of yourself as well!  
(after all, who knows what Wales might do...)

Well then, that's all! Bye bye!

Well, please excuse my earlier outburst. It was most un-professional of me.

***snort***

Nothing is 'new' here._ (the author says please see the bottom of the chapter!)_

_Me… Err… Well, we first met back in 500BC… I started looking out for him around 200BC, and we've been together like strawberries and cream since the Roman invasion! The first one… i.e. the landings, but non-invasion._

**_HIYA PRETTY PERSON!_**

**Shut up, little bugger.**

Hypocrite.

Go ahead. I'll be in the kitchen.

**Why do I hate England? He's an annoying, whiney wee scum bag who took all of mother's attention because he was so wee compared to us, then had the nerve to try to speak when she left. He joined the Romans. He'll never be one of us.**

**_I may have been Roman, but they only mined my land, not settled… So I can still skin faeries. :) As for my… Interests. It is art! Blood flowing down the wings of a faerie looks much better than down a person. ;) And it's legal.  
Dragons defend my land!_**

We all hate each other because we see too much of one another, our borders are too close, and we were born in an age where you fought to survive, and killed any competition. Babies kept mother away from you, so you tried to kill them. *completely unphased by all he's said* I hate them less than I did back before independence. Really, though, that just means I'm not blowing things up.

**_I love ALL my brothers! But… Scotty knows the most, and Welshie's funny, and Eire's my actual brother… Eggy's just WEIRD!_**

_That's why I'm hiding out in Romania! I will, and goodbye to you too!_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly **

**Hi...  
We are studying myths and legends and my friend chose to do the leprechauns because she likes Ireland (this ones a different one to the one I first mentioned). Also my other friend can do a good(I think) Irish accent.  
So how were you as children?  
Who is the second best country (the first being your own of course)?  
What do you think of 2P's?  
Bye bye, presentation due tomorrow... TT_TT  
****_YAY! SHE LOVES UP TOO!_**

Humph. Good. And Eggy's back.

**You right, boyo? You're looking a little pale.**

Of course I'm alright, git. Why wouldn't I be bloody alright?!  
**Good. Because you know what I do to sick little boys…**

**_I dunno… I wasn't there! *giggle*_**

Intolerable. All of them. I, of course, was perfect.

**I think someone's got their FACTS A LITTLE TWISTED!**

… They're all gits… Except Japan. And Germany. And who's the other one… Anyone commonwealth is decent.

**_*starts crying* Don't let them get me, EIRE!_**

*sigh* Why is it always me?

**_Because it's not… ;) I am very good friends with them, although my brothers… Not so. Eng-a-land will tolerate them long enough to send them back, of course._**

Good luck, love.

**Lass.**

It's bloody love.

* * *

**Rizu Roraito **

**It's not that fancy! I just wanted to know porque (because) I am making some of my home's food for us to eat! :D**

I would ask you to bring something pero (but)... ... Eh... You don't have to bring anything~. Nothing at all! Nada (Nothing)!

Pirate talk, eh? Good old days, creo (I believe)...

-Spain

Fine. Bring some of that cold tomato soup thing you're always eating. It's a dumb idea, but still. I shall bring food with me.

The bloody best.

**_Scotty!_**

**What?**

**_Whasa pirate?_**

* * *

**asymmetricalpasta03  
Hello! It's a pleasure to be talking to you. My name is Kat. So, I know you really don't like talking about your family (we don't really discuss ours, either). But I have a few questions I've been trying to wrap my head around and don't make sense. And since your editor says they'll be with you next time, here's a perfect place to ask!  
Firstly, (this is the main one) I don't understand how you're the youngest of your brothers (excluding Sealand, of course). According to Wikipedia, you conquered Wales (unknown date) and formed a treaty with Scotland (1707). Ireland had something to do with it, too (union in 1603). But the country/state/territory/province/whatever-you-call-yourselves of Northern Ireland wasn't formed until 1922 (from lands given to English Protestants in 1603) when the Republic of Ireland broke from the union. So, how isn't he the youngest? I have one theory, as him being more closely related to Ireland and therefore actually a half-brother. But I'd rather hear it from you and them, as you'd know.  
Secondly, how would you say Ireland is related to you? Cousin? Sibling? Great-uncle-twice-removed or something weird like that?  
Well, those were the two main ones. Thank you for your time spent reading this and I look forward to hearing back from you!  
asymmetricalpasta03**

_(the author would like to make clear that this entire part is her own theories, nd NOT in any way accepted as canon… There should also be warnings of, errr, morally questionable activities which I do NOT approve of)_

Good evening, Kat.

It's bloody complicated, but if you insist.

**Not that complicated, lassie **

We are NOT discussing this.

**_*giggle* BUBBLES!_**

Fine.

**_He's actually not our brother at all. All of Ireland used to be owned by Hibernia, mother's little sister… In the way America's our little brother. Adopted, but non-genetically. She was too young to have children when looking for an heir, so adopted Ireland from mother, hence why he got Ireland._**

**_;) I'll go from here. Back in the twenties, Eire got REALLY drunk. Properly drunk. And Hibernia was also pretty drunk, and visiting. One thing led to another, and we found North Ireland on the doorstep a few months later._**

You love bloody ruining our reputations.

**_;) You're next._**

… I hate you and your scrawny arse.

**_Big brother! Hating's BAD!_**

…

I told you it was bloody complicated.

* * *

**Guest**

**lol I love talk like a Pirate day, me mates and I were talking like pirates at college today...and farmers heh heh, shiver me timbers! and combines harvesters! brill Q & A me lover! *she says in her farmer accent* (it's alright for me to take the mick of the accent cos I sort of have the accent myself, its RP/west country accent...I'm rambling I'll stop now, I apologise deary...:)**

**_Hoist the rigging and climb the mast?_**

Where did you learn THAT?!

**_Eggy taught me!_**

I'm…

**_*glare*_**

Never mind.

* * *

**bodesciakirkland**

**You are just a sweetie...WAIT! Did you say the brothers? Do you mean my other sons? Oh wow, my beloved children are all going to be together. Now...time for the questions.**

1. Your mummsie is here to say her hello to her beloved children, have you miss me, well HAVE YOU MISSED ME?

2. Britain, next time, I do hope you tone your attitude down a little *reveals a spear*because I don't want to cause some sort of problem, would you agree? "points the spear at her sons with a angry face*

3. I'm just glad that you have matured...in more ways than one, I hope you do make me feel some welcomed, right?

*gives her children the death glare that make them shake...even if it is a little*  
To the writer, children will always be rebellious as ever, agree?

**_Oh, hell this is creepy._**

LANGUAGE!

**_Scotty… What's 'hell'? And who'a you?_**

**Thanks a lot, Wales. And she's your mother.**

**_You're welcome._**

**_Oh… HI MUMMY!_**

**Please excuse him. The Netherlands spiked his tea. … Or, rather, his tea was spiked with the Netherlands drugs by a less responsible country**

Hello, mother.

Evening.

**_Er…_**

**Of course we missed you!**

2) *chokes* Yes, mother.

**_*laughs* Give it to him!_**

**_I want one too!_**

You don't. Trust me.

**_I trust you, Eire! *giggle* that sounds like diarrhoea! _**

… What are you going on about?

**_Ignore him. He's high._**

3) Of course we will do our best to welcome you back… Right?

**_You can have my bed! You're so pretty!_**

North. That's your MOTHER!

**_Um… Really? *points to statue* I though Mummy was ginger…_**

_O.o Even by my faerie standards this is odd._

_(the author says she guesses so. She has two younger siblings, but no children of her own)_

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall **

**I honestly though wench meant something vulgar. I thought the word shared a similarity to bitch, I heard it in other anime shows before.**

To Pirate England *clears throat then takes a deep breath*

YOU ASSHOLE! WHEN I GET SET FREE, I AM GOING TO KICK YOUR BLOODY ASS. SOMEBODY GET ME OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW, PRUSSIA! DENMARK! YOU GUYS ARE JACKASSES! *some how manages to free myself from being tied to the tree* YOU DOUCHE BAG OF A PIRATE...I AM GOING TO STICK MY FOOT UP YOUR SORRY ASS. *grabs Pirate England's coat making him turn around. I go to punch him but it didn't work and I ended up falling* MOTHER FUCKER! DON'T YOU DARE MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A DUMB ASS! *starts getting into a fight with him while he fights back* DAMN IT I NEED A WEAPON LIKE FAST! *grabs a sticks, pretending to use it like a sword, Pirate England laughs at me until I gotten the chance to punch the shit out of him* I GOT YOU THAT TIME YOU SORRY BASTARD! COME AT ME MOTHERFUCKER! *thus the fighting between us continues*

To the writer, I am so sorry that happen but he did tie me to the tree, that damn fool. Are England's brother are going to be here? *comes with an idea* I'll take Scotland's side in all of this.

To Scotland, LET ME JOIN YOU IN BEATING PIRATE ENGLAND'S ASS. WE SHALL BE IN AN ALLIANCE.  
*grabs his hands happily and my eyes sparkle with fan-girl joy*

Goodbye for now!

Unfortunatly, I am no longer pirate and so am not wearing a coat. However… BLOODY GET HER!

*a swarm of faeries are now attacking you*

**AYE LASSIE!**

Please excuse this brief intermission

_…_

_(the author says that's fine… TIME SKIP!)_

* * *

**kuroiyou63 **

**wow Britain talking like a pirate is weird...  
damn. Sherlock Holmes is awesome.  
oh yeah, I asked my friends what they want to say to you and one asked if you'll go on a date with her. She likes your accent and she's been to England sooooo..  
heh If scotland is there can you kick his ass? I'd do it personally, on the crotch though, but I'm not there am I?  
heh**

**_Too true. Shall we carve up his unicorn in revenge? ;)_**

I see you are a fine and well cultured person.

As for your friend…

**NOBODY dates my little brother without getting through me.**

**_…_**

**Non-nations, anyhow. I would be most happy to do so.**

*shouts various proficiencies*

_I'll get you, you nasty little mortal… NOBODY hurts by charge, and NOBODY may just ask him for a date… They must go through me first._

* * *

**IamTheAwesomePrussiaAndDenma rk **

**Keseseses you act like your so tough England bu you freaked out when "America" pulled that prank on you**

I'm not the one speared to a bloody tree. And I saw you when Germany dressed up as the bloody Krampus to scare you.

* * *

**DJMitsu**

**Mein Gott. You have a blog.  
You've made my day, you know that? X3**

Not alllll Americans are completely ignorant and culturally unaware!  
And I'm willing to eat a scone to prove it.

So, all your fairy tales and mythology and the like are really interesting, and I was wondering if you took inspiration from all your magical friends, or if you just put whatever went on directly to paper? (Also, are there different kinds of faeries and things like that?)

_(the author says in future, please can you submit by PM? If it's not possible I understand, but may have to stop replying to you at little to no notice)_

Thank America for that.

***snort* I'll believe that when I see it.**

Of course you can have a scone! Here you go!

**_DON'T EAT IT! *cries* It'll make you sick…_**

My cooking's not that bloody bad.

**_It is._**

NOT!

**_My knives say otherwise… ;)_**

*eye roll* Just eat the thing. It won't do any permanent damage.

Many of them are, but others are collected from all over the world – from other country's fae folk.

…

**What he means to say was he was invaded a lot, so his ancient mythology is a wee bit messed up.**

All stories have basis in something. Some are stories the faeries told me, some were passed by other countries, some happened and were embellished.

_Of course there are different sorts! 'Faerie' is a generic term for any magical being – technically, it includes everything from witches to elves, through trolls and will-o-the-wisps. Most people think of little things with wings though._

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**'Lady Jane'? what is it? (please forgive my poor education..)  
that's your story? I thought you were capable of telling more intersting story... well I guess I was wrong... but really you ripped of his coat..you should start hanging with Belarus- she always does it when she founds him asleep and not, she doesn't rip off only his coat...  
I once visited her and rhen she insisted on visiting Russia. We entered through his the window for some strange reasons... and found him asleep. I must say that at some point I turned around and try to ran awa- ahem.. to return home, but I got myself stucked to the wall by her knives.  
I still was there when russia woke up... I mabey don't have vodka bottels to prove it but I have scars...many scars.  
Anyway I want another story!**

**oops...where is my manners... so  
Hi England, how was your day? oh and I heard that your brothers are coming for visit.. hi England's brothers :)  
(yes I did forget Flying Mint Bunny on purpose! he did forgot me too once after all...)**

**and what's wrong with ny English today?  
Where are my manners? - I was supposed to say it was an 'are', right?  
I HATE ENGLISH!**

**not 'ny' - 'my' I wnted to write 'my'...  
AAhhhh- I REALLY REALLY HATE ENGLISH!**

Lady Jane was the name of my ship, named in honour of the first Queen of my country. Matilda ruled first, but was called an empress and was in a civil war with the king _(the author says, for more information, see the anarchy!)._ Most people think of Mary the 1st as the first female monarch o my country, but after the death of her brother, Edward, the nobles were squabbling over which sister would be queen – the Catholic Mary was older, whilst Elizabeth was Protestant, like her brother. She ruled the country for nine days, before being executed for treachery.

…

Really, she was just a girl being used by her family. Pretty, clever young thing who hated the idea of being a monarch.

Bloody politics.

***snort* When he's not on pirate that's more likely…**

I'm not bloody like Belarus! We ran out of rum, and every good ship has bloody alcohol!

Let me see.

**_Tell them about Alfie!_**

?!

He means Alfred, idiot.

I knew that, but-

**The OTHER Alfred?**

She wanted about nations though… I suppose there's always this one. Frog-face, idiot and … a little blonde nation were all at my house (this was back just before revolution). It was late, a dark night and the rain was pouring down. America looked about fifteen at the time, whilst the little blonde one was about five. Frog had banned me from the kitchen with a 'zou cannot feed mes cheires tat!', bloody frog. We were supposed to be at war, too. America and the little one had gone somewhere, and I was cleaning. Then we heard screaming. Frog and I both ran to see what on earth was the matter. We found America pointing wildly at the wardrobe, looking very, very pale. Carefully, we opened the wardrobe, to find it empty. Frog started shouting something about 'mon petit', and frantically searching everywhere. America screamed again, and passed out. I readied a spell, looking behind me, to see a white sheet with eye holes cut in it, placed over a little blonde nation. Needless to say, nobody involved was wonderfully impressed.

Capitals for names, love. And you'll get there.

Hello.

**_Hi ;) So, you know where the bunny is… Tell me so I can go 'see' him. ;)_**

**Good e'ening, lassie.**

**_HI! Can you see the sparkles, too?!_**

Hello. Please excuse him. We're not sure how long drug-spiked effects take to wear off. Apparently, a long time for nations.

_MEANIE! … Hello, I'm Flying Mint Bunny and (the author says for the purpose of this fic) I'm a SHE!_

The correct way would be 'where are my manners'

**Don't get him started, and you're doin' fine, lassie.**

* * *

**_Hum… Dragon needs to see me. I should most likely say farewell… Or fare badly. I'd rather you fared badly._**

**I need to be running, laddies. Same time, same place?**

Aye.

…

I should probably take North home, seeing as he's passed out.

When I get my hands on that bloody Dutchman, I'll skin him!

Whatever.

…

…

Finally, they're bloody gone. My day has been… eventful, if nothing else.

France 'invaded' this morning, not to mention my bloody brothers were still here. Then the bloody idiot American rang whilst I was in the kitchen earlier.

…

Ah, blast. I might as well say it.

But how to put it…

...

I have a bit of a problem.

…

America's asked me to dinner.

…

I've said I'll go, but I'm not sure what he wants. Apparently, it's important.

…

He'd better not want another bloody loan.


	11. Post 11 - A special notice

Well, I only have time for a quick update today. I'll finish later.

America need picking up in about an hour...

Ah, how rude. I should explain.

The bloody meal America asked me to? Apparently, he's been dared to keep a boyfriend, so he had the bloody nerve to ask me out!

...

And I only said yes because I felt sorry for him, of course.

_Of COURSE... NOT! You've been running everywhere getting this set up. :) Japan, France, Canada... You even asked Hong Kong for help!_

Shut up.

Today is the return date, however. It will be brilliant... The best date of his life!

_You know, if you actually didn't care, you'd just take him out for coffee like a normal person, not see your old bo-_

SHUT UP! You'll give the bloody game away!

_*sigh* You two are so cute together..._

What?

_*giggle* Now for some fun..._

_(The author says she will do replying along with a report on the 'date' tomorrow... But she's a bit pushed for time, and I thought you'd like to know what's going on in the Land of Kirkland... Zie brothers shall be house-sitting, to warn you)_


	12. Chapter 12

_((Before we begin, I, the author, would like to apologise for the infrequent updates during term time. I am VERY busy at school, but off this week, so I should be able to put through a couple of updates. Sorry again, Froggie))_

It's been a while, has it not? I should probably give you my report…

The 'date' with America went as well as could be expected, my eco-

_Right, date! It was so cute! America's flight was REALLY late in, due to a bomb scare, but no bombs so its annoying but fine. Britain picked him up and took America to Downing Street, where they played Mari Kart (Britain had been taking a crash-course at Japan's house), lots and lots and win:loss ratio was about 50/50. Then, they ordered pizza, which as very funny when Mr Cameron collected it at the door. After that, they went and camped out in the Tower of London (White Tower), where America couldn't see the ghost-kings… Although he COULD hear them. Anyhow, all the old monarch who live there approve, too! YAY!_

No thank you, Bunny.

Anyhow, I am now officially out of recession, although a triple dip one looks likely with the way Europe is heading.

The Chief Whip has resigned over some un-savoury comments he made.

Oh, and one of our most highly revered (and dead) presenter's reputation is shattered due to the emerging scandal; it has come to light that he was sexually abusing young children of both genders – this activity is wrong, and may never be made less so, in any circumstances.

_Nations HATE these situations, because they know, but it's physically impossible for them to do anything about them._

As you can tell, I have been quite busy if you may forgive me.

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**2p greece: AHAHA  
kitty: ...*gets popcorn*  
2p england: would you like some cupcakes?  
2p greece: NO.  
2p england:*starts chasing 2p greece* YES  
kitty: AMERICA~ CONTROL YOUR BOYFRIEND!  
2p america:grrrr*starts shooting at kitty*  
kitty: *hides behind iggy* I GOT A SHEILD!**

Well, it seems like all is under control here…

Now, where did I put my tea?

_It's over here!_

Ah, thank you, Bunny.

* * *

**Alfred and Mattie**

**Haha! Dude you're funny. Yeah. *totally skimmed his insults* So...Hum... I'll be insensitive! But you'll feel better at the end. ...Or really depressed... Hum...**

**1. If I was such an idiot, how am I the most powerful country in the world? How was I able to beat every war? While you fought... And failed...**

**! Besides The Beatles, all britishy things SUCK. We americans make it better! Like: Harry Potter: A Very Potter Musical! Sherlock: Sherlock... ect ect.**

**3. Oh I may be insolent but you know what you are? A mean, cranky, drunk who only cares about himself. So there. Hmph.**

**4. You will never be as hot as I am. Girls like meh sexy body. You are all skin and bones. And eyebrows.**

**5. No. I looked it up! A lot of people are fat where you live. And we Ameticans are trying to fight obesity! We made our school lunches better, *I* go to schools sometimes to talk about it.**

**..**

**HEY! My ** is not that big! It's... perfectly plump! Yeah.. that works. And at least mine isn't all bony. Yeah. France told me of that one time you sat on him and your bones were all weird and stuff.**

**..**

**Okay one last thing: *coughs* I'm sowwy Mister Engwand for offending you. :C I weally am.. Sowwy. *BABY VOICE OFF***

_… I'm starting to regret chosing you to date him… -_-_

Did yo say something, Minty?

_No. Nothing at all ^o^'_

…If you say so…

1) I hate to break it to you, love, but you're not going to be the bloody strongest for much longer.

…

_Yep. Really regretting this now… Cheer up, Iggy! I'll go... Um… Japan's coming over, and ou have that match with Spain, remember?_

2) Britishy? Really, you idiot. That's not even a bloody word. And since when was Watson a bloody woman? Git.

3) _England, go get some tea._

_Really, America. This is very immature of you, making your boyfriend cry like that. One more move and I'll… Come and hex you! Great… Now I'm left defending my charge against someone who doesn't believe I exist… _

_And if that were truly the case, he wouldn't have given you a nice date. He would have just told you to get lost._

4) _Okay, I'll give you that… He really should eat more… *sigh* …_

5) _If you hadn't noticed, the same is going on here, Meri-dearest. And Britain runs a summer camp for dis-advantaged children, where they get to try out different sports which can be played back in the streets._

_I'll let you in on a secret – he thinks it cute… In THAT way. I didn't say, though. ^-^_

_As I said, he needs to eat… Can you dag him out to dinner for me?_

_*sigh* … You really should know better, Meri-dearest. Please stop making him upset, though._

I suppose I can forgive you… Just this bloody once, mind you.

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl**

**H'llo,**

**Hello, guys. Toni has given me control of her account for a while, so it's just me, London.**  
**She said she would like to let you know that she is not a pervert and just had a cold.**  
**I think I'll make this short. I'm kind of worried about her. It's almost her birthday, and she gets...kind of...funky around this time... *whispers* kind of like England-nii and the American Revolution...she never says why, just something about her father.**

**Wales, you scare me sometimes. O_O**  
**Oh, um, England-nii? I think I would like your help over here. Her brother has dropped hints that she gets... *cough* really depressed... and she's obsessed with all things British...**

**I think she'll be back next time. She said that her brother was taking her out today, to keep her occupied. I really hope so. She's normally a really cheery person and it's scary when she's depressed.**

**With love,**

**London (Victoria Kirkland)**

Ah, hello London.

_Ah. I understand. Give her our condolences._

**_There you are, bunny…_**

_*Yelp!* Britain, HELP!_

Get off her you bloody psychopath.

**_;) I'll chop you up and…_**

…

Alright, he's temporarily locked in the wardrobe… What the bloody hell is he doing here, though.

_I'm now going to mysteriously disappear, and go see Norway… BYE!_

I'm going over for tea this evening, or did you forget, love?

* * *

**Springirth Dale**

**Nah, it's alright, England. You can speak that way whenever you want. It's fine.**

**...**

**Hiya, North! You're two times fun when you're high!**

**...I feel bad for you, Scotland. I'm sorry.**

**Woah. Dragons. Cooooollll~!**

**I learnt lots today! Thanks for the info!**

**Bye bye! =)**

**(from Hong Kong)**

**...Haha.**

**Your brothers are downright amusing.**  
**You could be like, a comedian group or something.**  
**I'm not lying.**

**Oh, and have you seen my Nyotalia counterpart?**  
**I'm just asking. Maybe you kidnapped her or something...**

**Anyway, America's just probably like, gonna feed you burgers or something.**  
**If you don't wanna have dinner, then refuse.**

**Sigh...anyway, just call your 2P and tell him to disguise as you so you won't be found out. Simple.**

**...That's all. Bye, eyebrows.**

**P.S. I am not a git.**

Why'd you go bloody summon the rest of them?!

**Hum… Did you say something, brother…**

Of course I did

**_Please don't fight yet…_**

**_Aww… The bunny's gone… I want to make pretty patterns…_**

**_Maybe… But my head still hurts from it. So be quite, pleasey pleasey please please!_**

**_Oh, no… They're hot. Fire breathing ladies of old, covered in scales like lizards crawling o all fours and guarding treasure troves…_**

**Don't pity me, fool.**

Scotland. Put away that cigar. It's bad for North to be breathing in the smoke.

**_I'm the eldest; I do as I damn well please._**

Here we go again…

_Please excuse this brief intermission! The brother have knocked each other out!_

Seeing as they're gone…

**_HI HONG KONG! Is it pretty in China? It must be really nice to have a Mummy… :(_**

You do know China's a girl, right North?

**_Oops…_**

You don't have to blood live with them.

No, why would I have seen YOUR bloody counterpart? She's probably in town buying new lamp shades or something.

**_Can I have new lamp shades?_**

I'll make you some for Christmas.

**_Thanks Weird Big Brother!_**

…

Please don't call me that.

**_What, weird?_**

Um… No. Not… Irk… Big Brother.

**_Um…Okay?_**

Well thank you fo your advice. I may action upon it next bloody time…

_No you will not. You. Need. A. Life. So I've given you're your boyfriend, and you WIL enjoy yourself. 'Kay? J_

**_Who's hacking the 'count?_**

Never mind that, North. Go wake up Scotland.

Bloody git.

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**Morning...At least I'm writing this in the morning...**

**That's...Mean. Wales creeps me out now...**

**By sane, I mean, sane enough not to harm uber adorable bunnies just because they're protective. ...Unless you DO do that...**

**It was still funny...I can imagine some cat scratching your face off... XD**

**Okie den. YOUR COOKING SUCKS **, ENGLAND. I hope that made him less proud.**

**If Russia isn't able to protect you...Nobody can. I'll be sure not to hurt 'im, not that I can, really. AND THAT WASN'T A SPELLING ERROR!**

**Had, right. Sorry. Oh, that makes a lot more sense then. I never really paid that much attention to it...**

**England, I just wanted to randomly ask this. What's with your...terms? Like that language you use...Saying stuff like 'bloody' and 'wanker'...**

Good afternoon.

He bloody creeps everyone out…

**_Scotty's up, but he says his head hurts…_**

Go give him some Nurofen – it's in the box by the sink.

**_Oki doki! BYE!_**

On tha reckoning, everyone but Wales is bloody sane.

It's not funny!  
**It was.**

Not helping, Scotland!

**_I bought the make-you-_****no****_-sicky!_**

**What?**

He means painkillers.

**Right… Give them to me.**

**_I'll just delete that, otherwise they'll start fighting again… Eire's still got the recession-flu, and the rest of us are only just out of it._**

Well, they're no stranger than America's bloody terms.

_(the author says that, despite being English-British, I have NEVER heard someone say 'wanker'… It is more impolite than you Americans seem to realise.)_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly **

**Hello! My presentation went alright I guess, end of term is always very hectic. Well right now its school holidays in Australia, I've heard that students in the UK start the school year in September (I've found out from Harry Potter and other resources *looks at author*).  
Well what do you think of the recently popular 'opa gangnam style'? Last time I checked it was number 1 in the UK and Australia. It's quite... uh unique.  
In my local library they have a self check out and in the corner you can chose a language, one of them is Pirate, it's quite funny.  
Thank you England for the teletubbies, it was my favourite TV show as a child, I've still got a plush that my mum bought me when I was little. :P  
Well bye! I'm going ice skating tomorrow! :D**

**Congratulations, lass.**

**_Yep! Eiremakes me go to school, even though I'm 92 years old this year_**

**Ya still a wee laddie, North.**

Very… Unique…

**_I like it! *starts dancing*_**

It has the unfortunate side-effect of making us dance it whenever the music is n, due to its popularity… It's rather irritating…

Well, I'll have to inform your nation of that, won't I?

You're most welcome… I think? Tea?

**Ice skating? Only I'm cold enough for that right now. **

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**kitty: AHAHAHAHAHAHA, POOR ENGLAND. USUK. SEND ME PICTURES NOW.**

**_You can borrow my camera…_**

**He's doesn't mean it like that.**

*raised eyebrow* Wales is still out?

I'm not waking him.

_Delivery for Greece's Kitty: One pile of incrimating USUK photos, curotosey of Hon Kong studios and Unicorn delivery servce._

* * *

**Ethraen Ermanil**

**England-jiji!**

**Hi! Washington (state) here. I saw you had a blog and I thought I'd say hi. Sad to admit, I do have to say that most Americans are indeed idiots. However, what about major inventions and discoveries that have come from America?**  
**1) The Wright brothers? Without them, who knows when or if we'd have flight?**  
**2) The American who walked from the Northern border of England (the Scotland-Britian border) all the way down to London just to prove that the newspaper and politicians were wrong and the two countries actually liked each other.**

**It was a stupid bet, but it still showed the idiot politicians something.**

**Anyway, I agree though... which is sad coming from a state; that yes, most citizens are idiots. It's also because of that, that dad is somewhat of an idiot too.**

**Anyway, enough of that now; I have a question for you. You're 2P self is starting to scare me... Is there anyway to... I don't know, scare him back? He's sending me cupcakes... and knowing what people say about your cooking I don't trust them. By the way, you're cooking is tolerable. Maybe slightly more bland than what people are used to, but still. I actually don't mind British Cooking. French cooking gives too little... and dad's cooking is way too much.**  
**I know that you don't have a good relationship with your brothers, but why hold a grudge this long? I mean at the time, wasn't it more fight or be killed? Eat or be eaten? I mean, my siblings seem to have the same relationship, and I don't understand it at all! Don't get me wrong, I'm not naive, and we are still young, but can't you older nations be examples? You and dad even showed me that despite the war 1812, you could actually get together. Dad and Uncle Canada even made up. Even you and dad did! Why can't you make up with your brothers?**  
**Anyway, Here's a quote that would make your day I'm sure: "British vs the French is like The Shire vs Mordor." Yes, you are the Shire in that quote. ^^ It was said by a historian at one of my colleges. He's actually pretty neutral when it comes to teaching the 7 year war (French and Indian war) and beyond.**

**Oh, and since you kinda raised me, that would make you kinda like my dad right? So does that mean that I have creepy Uncles in Scotland, Wales and Ireland? Not as creepy as your 2P self though...**

**Ja ne England-jiji!**  
**Washington (state)**

Yes, yes, some of you are intelligent. At least your father mean well… But I didn't say that!

_(The author says that makes NO SENSE AT ALL. Scotland IS Britain, but Britain is not Scotland, 'kay?)_

**_Scotty says that politicians are idiotic bastards._**

NORTH!

**_What? I'm just sayin' what Scotty said…_**

Well, I'll happily make you something else!

_Getting rid of my 2P… America' 2P is normally fairly good at this, or North's._

**_I heard my name?_**

**I didn't hear anything… *glare at Norway***

I my impartial opinion as the only non-UK member here, they don't make up because they don't know HOW to be nice to one another… Not to mention they're ALL psychopaths. Or that Scotland still wants to fight them, or that Wales wants to kill everything.

**I heard that!**

You were supposed to.

**_Scotty… What sa psychopath?_**

Well, that's bloody brilliant.

**_LITERALLY!_**

Where the hell did you learn that?

**_The funny man says it a lot…_**

Funny... Man…

**Think he means Clarkson.**

I believe it does… Farewell.

**_SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE FISHIES!_**

**…**

I give up.

* * *

**Ayamari Uta**

**Si! Oh, if you want it warm, then I can make it so. I like it both ways de todas maneras (anyways). :D**

No! You don't have to bring comida (food)! You don't have to! You really don't! ;-;

[For chapter 11;] Felicidades, mi amigo! :D (Congrats, my friend!)

-Spain

**_Can I have some too…. Pwease?_**

**Eire, sort hm out before I murder the thing.**

**_DON'T KILL ME! *cries*_**

Look what you bloody did this time, Scotland.

*glare*

Anyway, I'll bring something! I have a new recipe that needs taste testing, and cold please.

I'm not sure whether to be happy or not…

* * *

**IntraSule**

**Britain! Yo, whaddup mi Inglaterra de perra?! t(=u=t)**

**Nice to see that you have your own blog, here! Hm, how do I begin? Oh, I know! *leans back on chair and crosses legs at the knees, with hands folded under chin* Maybe we can start by telling the truths and the lies of the future? To not let the alchemy tell such a tall story of eternity? Like how the beginning was an unquenchable desire awoken by loss, and no matter how many times one retread, convert, or reorganize the ending, it is still there with many variability? ;3**  
**Well, if you don't want to talk about that, then I guess I can ask you some questions and stuff. ._.**

**Is it true that in your cafe the male workers wear sexy uniforms when serving the patrons? Do you do so, too?**

**Have you read Sweden's blog called "Dry Ice?" It's very interesting...**

**To debunk your myth about dumb Americans, I decided to list a few intelligent people here: African-American poet Maya Angelou, Apple technology developer and CEO late Steve Jobs, civil rights activistand first woman to run for president Hillary Rodham Clinton, and America himself. Yo might not know it, but he's an intelligent nation, because even if he's not the best grammatically, his mathematic skills could be better, and his ability to sense the atmosphere is totally off, he knows and cherishes equality and unity among ethnicities, sexual orientations, and genders. Any fool can sport a Ph.D. and be socially idiotic with his racism and sexism and homophobia, but the wisest of them all can tell when to treat a person of a different culture, gender, whatever with dignity and respect if they earn it without even needing a high school dipolma . That's why I love being American.**

**Whoa, we just had a noble moment, here. ._. *headbangs to Breaking Benjamin***

**Yeah, okay, until next time...**

Hello.

**_HI!_**

**Evenin'**

Yes?

**_You make my head hurt…_**

The answer is forty-bloody-two, woman.

Define 'sexy'. Most of them do wear uniforms, so as to be always presentable and accountable.

**Only on weekdays.**

**_… No… He wears the outfits France and America bought him for Christmas on non-meeting weekdays._**

_(the author has not, and so does not feel qualified to comment)_

Oh go read where I dealt with this above! I'm not bloody typing it out again, but fine, there's some bloody clever Americans, and some bloody thick ones too.

**_BYE LADY!_**

* * *

**Julchen Marie Beilschmidt**

**Kesesesese! You're going on a date with that moron! Kesesese! This should be fun!  
~Julchen (fem!Prussia)**

**Oh bloody hell, I almost feel sorry for you...Almost...**  
**~Alice (fem!England)**

I've been on a date with the bloody moron.

And you need not feel so, Alice. I've heard his 2P has his eyes on you.

**_Hella Auntie Alice!_**

**I think I liked him better unconscious. …**

Don't you dare.

* * *

**Warnergirls2000**

**Heyo England! I was over at Canada and America's blogs and saw yours, So I decided to wander over and check it out. Yes, I'm American T_T but please don't hate me because of that. I do find that we have a few things in common so I'd like to be your friend if you let me. First off, I study magic as well. (Not black magic but, I have done a few spells here and there) So I'm sure we can trade secrets and what not. Also I do believe that you see the things you see. (pats him) keep your chin up. I've seen some strange things myself...although I'm not sure if I can see your friends. (Shrugs)**

**Oh and I hope to visit England someday, I'm quite interested in some of its history and culture as well as the ghost stories. My moms over there right now and she's having quite a fun time and sent me pictures of some things .**

**Anyway, How are you today? I hope no one is annoying you too much. You should try to find something to make you relax. You might get high blood pressure with how angry you get at others. Oh and I didn't mean that as something mean. I'm just worried about your health.**

**Anyway talk to you later! (waves) Bye bye**

Good afternoon.

**_I believe in them, too… ;) Shall we practice dark magic and destroy the puny faeries together._**

Bleeding heck, Wales. You've only just woken up!

**_So? It's never too early to murder a flying rabbit…_**

**_Wales, murdering I BAD!_**

***snort* You tell hi, boyo.**

**_*sticks out tongue at Wales*_**

_Ooh… Things are getting odd here… Can you see me, I-assume-is-a-miss?_

**Be sure to visit us too, lassie.**

That's a DOG'S name.

**It's what I call girls.**

I hope she enjoys herself very much and you come too someday.

I am very well, thank you. And you?

…

My bloody brothers materialised, have three scandals to sort out, not to mention the football ones, and Romania burnt his house down this morning. Other than that, everything is coming along swimmingly.

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

***attacks the faeries even though they are hurting me...it hurts. I manage to get away from them, just long enough to strangle the living hell out of England. Is having fun with this too, oh fucking joy*.**

**DON'T...YOU...DARE...TRY...TO...PULL...THAT...SHIT...WITH...ME...MOTHER...BLOODY...FUCKER! *continues strangling him while Scotland watches in awe* You and your scones...you were such a sexy pirate, you ruin thing by tying me to a tree. IT DIDN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY ENGLAND, YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF MAN, YOU ARE THE CAUSE OF THIS! IF YOU JUST LEARNED HOW TO HAVE FUN ENGLAND, I WOULDN'T HAVE TO HAD HURT YOU, I'M GOING TO TELL YOU TO STAY BRITISH SEXY! HOW CAN YOU DO THAT HUH ENGLAND, HOW THE BLOODY HELL?! *watches him turn red in the face, Scotland still watches* I believed in you, England you fucked up. *laughs while shedding some tears* That was hell for me and you did nothing...NOTHING BUT VISIT PRUSSIA AND DENMARK AT THE HOSPITAL! Those shitty ass scones your momma, I'm not going to say mummsie, I'mma say momma...why because I'M FUCKING AMERICAN, ASS BITCH! The scones almost killed me, I hope America feeds your pathetic ass hamburgers that make you fat as hell itself. THIS WEATHER WOMAN PREDICT A 99% CHANCE OF FUCK-YOUR-ASS-UP STORM AND IT'S COMING RIGHT AT YA *punches the shit out of him while everyone watches in awe. England starts bleeding like crazy, Scotland is laughing his ass off, the others are speechless, while the faeries are looking for me still* DO YOU FEEL MY PAIN HUH, DO YA FEEL IT? THIS IS 100% AMERICAN RIGHT HERE, LET ME SHOW YA HOW WE DO IT BIG IN AMERICA. I WILL CUT YOUR *censored* OFF AND USE IT TO SKULL FUCK YOU IN THE *censored* LIKE YOU CAME ACROSS A *censored***

***still beats the shit out of him, everyone stares while Scotland laughs* I am one pissed off woman.**  
**Writer, forgive me, I'm just mad and that isn't like me *punches England who tries to fight me off* LAY THE FUCK DOWN AND MAN YO ASS UP! YOU GROW A PAIR, START GROWING IT! I am truly sorry about that. Scotland, take over, I'm going to relax away from England before I kill him *walks away listening to Scotland beat the crap out of England* I hope that his brother be here next time because this would be weird-OH SHIT THE FAERIES FOUND ME! *runs like hell with them chasing me* SEE YOU NEXT TIME, WRITER!**

…

**_Hurting Eggy is not nice… I'll tell America about you!_**

_SECONDED! *bunny glare* We shall now initiate the time skip!_

_*time skip*_

* * *

**bodesciakirkland**

**My sons are so sweet, I'm so glad you miss mummy *hugs them each* Some of you need to watch your language *reveals spear again* around me. Getting high, drunk, are we? Sounds like loads of fun.  
Did you have fun as a pirate, England? I am glad to feel welcome, yes I am a ginger. Now, show your mummsie around because I want to see exactly how my sons are doing. No *reveals spear, they shake a little * back talk either. *her sons show her around, they are astounded by how beautiful she is. They are having some form of family time* This is fun, is it not? *they blush, yet try to play it cool. She laughs which make them laugh nervously* **

Of COURSE, mother dearest.

**_Sorry… I got confused. I get confused a lot… -_-'_**

It wasn't his fault, ma'am.

**Nawh, it was that idiot's fault again.**

It was a… *mentally pleads for help* unique experience.

**_Yeah… I still gotted confused!_**

**Gotted isn't a word.**

**_Oopsie!_**

Oh look, it just started raining again… I had very much fun, ut should go collect the washing.

…

**_Hey, mother… Little Iggy's got a boyfriend. ;)_**

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**m back again. Hello Britain.  
Flying Mint Bunny, Are you angry with my friend? I know she's a lil boy crazy but... Don't hate her!  
yeah wales is awesome.  
One of my friends said your stupid Britain. I don't know why she said that...  
Others said you look stupid. And Others said you... are ... uh... awesome? not sure.  
yeah a few people I asked can't say anything good**

Good afternoon

**_Hi… ;)_**

**Evenin'**

**_Why'd you not say hi to us… :(_**

_NOBODY may date England without MY permission… It' so cute setting him on dates with America… *dreamy sigh*_

**_Well, thank you._**

**_Scotty, he's creeping me out._**

**And that's my problem because?**

…

I'll bloody show them…

_(the author flops onto her keyboard… 114 minutes… To type... this silly… thing.)_


	13. Post13: North takes over a plot begins!

_(The author would like to say PLEASE send by PM, even though it is less conveniant for both you and myself... Also, this chapter takes a turn for the bizzar [We now have a PLOT shock horror], although I need America to get back here and talk to me/Wales *hint hint* Um... Think that's that... Oh! And advetising: I'm part of a Cardverse roleplaying forum on Deviantart - for not too long, but anway (Austria). We're short of some very important characters like N. Italy, Germany, Liechtenstein, Hungary and China, plus there's posts where you pick the role. Anyway, it's alright in my suit, but I know Hearts are having some issues... Anyway, there's a link on my profile.)_

* * *

**_HI! It's North!_**

**_I know that Eggy normally does this, but he's disappeared... :( I wanted him make my foot feel better... But I made him some champ, and he's still not back. Lotsa, lotsa champ!_**

**_I went to Eire and he told me to grow up, Scotty laughed at me, and Welshie kicked me in a ditch. *cries* I want Eggy to com make it better. :'(_**

**_But, yeah... So, I'm doing this today all by myself (unless one of he others turn up) like a big boy! Because I'm a big boy... Argh. You get the idea..._**

**_So, yeah. I'm doing this, 'kay? . Hopefully I do good. If you want them passing onto him, say and I'll-a do it!_**

**_I don't want Eggy to be angry..._**

**_Hopefully he's okay... _**

**_Nobody else seems to care, though... :(_**

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**Kitty: HI IGGY. HI BUNNEH THAT FLIES. OMAGAWD CANDEH! *starts killing candy* **

**2p greece:...yeah...imma blame you*points at england* **

**kitty: ...HEY IGGY HAVE YOU TRIED ALCOHOL CANDEH!? IT TASTES GOOOODD~**

**_Um... I haven't, but I don't know about big-brother Eggy!_**

**_And Bunneh That Flies, huh? Oh... Minty. She's gone looking for him, and she's not back yet either, which is bad... :(_**

**_I want everyone to love one another..._**

* * *

**IntraSule**

**Bonjour, Moi Angleterre!**  
**Yay, you've updated your blog! \(*u*)/ And I see that you had your date with America; did you enjoy the time with him or will you become a tsundere and say that you hated the date with him? (meaning: did you like him or hate him?)**  
**I'm so sorry to hear that those children had suffered in such a way. It's so disgusting to think that the person you admire and trusted to do the right thing for citizens would abuse that trust and worse, hurt the ones that are too innocent to know what s/he is doing to them and are powerless to fight back.**  
**Anyhoo, before I get sick of societal depression, I'm currenly listening to an amazing Japanese song called "Aoi Hana" by Color Bottle. I really love it, and the anime that used the song for its theme song- effing beautiful!**  
**"ne~ ima doushite bokura umaretano ne~ hora doushite bokura deattano wakaranakute kowai kara tsunaida kono te o ima kimi ni tsuyoku nigirikaeshite hoshiin da"**  
**English version of the lyric: "Hey, why were we born? Hey, why did we meet? I cant say why and Im scared, so please hold my hand tightly in return."**  
**Of course there's more to the song, because repeating these over and over again is not cool songwriting. Listen for yourself! :D**  
**"42?" Wha...? Pfft, whatever... This is the true answer: /watch?v=UAUjWW8UiM4**  
**Hi, Iggy's brothers! Hi, Mint Bun-bun! How are you guys doing over there? Didn't snack on British food, I hope? Ha ha ha! No, I'm just kidding...half-kidding...I ate a scone once and it was horrible...Dry and everything...**  
**I meant "sexy uniform" as in nothing but a collar, tie, wrist cuffs, and an apron. That's it. Nothing else. I read that Iggy's cafe has that as a uniform. So, is it really true? You like feeling smexy, Iggy? *snicker* Taking up after France, I see? *snickers louder* Eh heh heh heh, sorry, sorry, I know how much you hate that...Which is why I love it so. *smirk***  
**I'm glad to see that you've recognized some of the American geniuses behind the "idiotic American" stereotype! I have defended my country well! \(^_^)/ Now to leave my country for Iceland for the gender equality, or Spain for the smexy-sexy men. *sigh and starts packing, even without a passport ready***  
**Later, love!**

**_Um, he's not here right now... He don't like Frenchy langauge, and Frenchy's been teaching me funny words!_**

**_I reckon he liked his date, but he won't tell you he did! He must hve enjoyed hs date, 'cause even Mr Japan helped him plan it!_**

**_:( Welshie's even more silly than normal because his little girl's missng, too. :( Everyone's sad... I want the to be happy!_**

**_That's really cute! Like a rabbit! I want a rabbit, but Eire keeps on taking them away from me... :( I still love my brother, though._**

**_I think that was an attempt at humour... I think... Maybe... Can I have some sweeties?_**

**_Hella! Well, I've been a-talking to you anyway, but I'm NORTHERN IRELAND! They still mke me go to school, even though I'm really old. The others are gone - I think Scotland and Wales are trickle treating, and Eire's gone back to target practice! Eggy's somewhere... But no-one knows where. :(  
Do you want some champ? It's mashied 'tatoes with scallions!__(the author says scallions are onions)_**

**_*confused look* Why is that bad? And why would someone dress like that; it's silly!_**

**_I heard Iceland's really pretty right now, ut I'm not allowed to go incase I hurt myself. I do that a lot... ^-^'_**

**_Bye bye lady!_**

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl**

**Hey, big brother. Minty. Whoever else is there.**

**Well, I asked her brother, and he said (after much blackmailing- I mean, convincing-) that it had something to do with their father going insane or something and telling her all these horrible things. O_o Like, how she was- you know what, this is too depressing. IF Tonia wants, she'll tell you.**

**WALES! D: Get away from me!**

**Oh, right. I did. Sorry, big brother. I'll see you then.**

**There's a 99.99% chance she'll be back and cheery again next time I write.**

**With love,**

**London (Victoria Kirkland)**

**_Just me - sorry London!_**

**_Sad... Would she like a huggle? I can give her one if she wants... _**

**_Mr Welshie isn't here right now so, tank 'oo for calling, and please leave a message after d'beep! *sneeze*_**

**_Hey, have you seen Eggy? Nobody else CARES! *cries* Even Mr 'Meri doesn't know, and they're DATING! *^-^*_**

**_BYE BYE NIECEY!_**

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello again! Schools has started again..but I got elected as house leader! I'm very happy!**

**The weather in Melbourne is finally starting to warm up, today we had 31 degrees all day. It was so hot! It's 9:30 pm and it's 25 degrees**

**So England... you and America hmmmm?**

**I'm going to visit America at the end of the year, I asked my mum if we could go to the UK but alas I failed. But my mum said maybe next year. My sister wants to go shopping every day! I'm going to dieeee, I wanted to go sight seeing, not shopping :(**

**So will you and America go on another date? Whose food do you think is the best? Bye! :)**

**_School's boring... But that's cool! Eire keeps on changing my school so nobody notices I'm not growing up, but he won't let me be 'home educated' - I've been in the same year for 70 years, and have full marks for the last 65! :(_**

**_Wow... That'sa hot!_**

**_Yep! They are! Don't tellhim I told you, though. I'll be in trouble. *serious face*_**

**_Shopping's even MORE boring than SCHOOL! :( America's fun. I like him. He gives me sweeties. Scotty doesn't. :(_**

**_Er... I not going on a date with America... Eggy might... If he's still alive..._**

**_I want him to come home..._**

**_Everyone else is ignoring me again..._**

**_:(_**

**_He has to be okay, right?_**

* * *

**TheBlackPaperMoon**

**Afternoon, Iggy! ^_^**  
**I'm warning you now. I'm going to be seriously immature, innapropriate, unmannerly...Today.**  
**Le first things first. YOU COULDN'T HAVE PICKED A BETTER PERSON TO FALL IN LOVE WITH, ARTIE! I approve of your relationship with America. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! Have you guys had sex yet? *totally shameless***  
**...Does he make little babies cry? D:**  
**I think Scotland is cool, yep.**  
**I don't even remember what painkillers are for...Oh...I'm so stupid. *head desk***  
**Hmm? Oh, that's too bad...**  
**THERE ARE AMERICAN TERMS!? THE FUDGE!?**  
**(( *flails* I sowwy! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THERE WERE DIFFERENT BRITISH ACCENTS, DUDE! ))**

**_Oh... Maybe I should get Eire to come do this..._**

**_..._**

**_Hesays he's busy..._**

**_Um... I gues I can try?_**

**_I like them being together, and America's been teaching me about sex. He says it's jumping on the bed, which is why people get tired from it. I dunno if they've jumped on the bed yet though. I get told off when I do that so I guess not!_**

**_Eire calls me a baby, and Wales makes me cry, so YEAH! And Wales gives me the wrong answers to my homework. *glare*_**

**_Scotty's nice when he's not got one of those nasty smelling thingeys._**

**_Even I know what they do, and Yorkshire calls me a funny onion. Which is weird... 'Cause I'm not an onion..._**

**You're turning into one, though. ;)**

**_I DON'T WANNA BE AN ONION!_**

**_*pause*_**

**_Huh... where'd Welshie go?_**

**_... I dunno. Never mind!_**

**_Well, I dun't sound like Scotty, and Eggy don't sound like either of us-es._**

**_And then there's all the nieces and nephewses and children that sound different again!_**

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**Took ya long enough. I've just been reading HP again. Though it sucks that it already ended.**

**Me an' my mum are gonna try your bloody scones. I hope it doesn't kill me or my familly...**

**Yo flying mint bunny. I really hope you won't mind if I use you as a project. We're suposed to make cut outs and I thought of putting wings on a rabbit one and painting it mint colored...**

**And I didn't say hello to your brothers Britain because I never knew they were gonna be there.**

**_HP... HP sauce? That's tastes on sausages! But why are yo reading the sauce bottle? *clueless look*_**

**_They won't! They're not THAT bad... But then people say my food's bad, too, but I like it._**

**_Minty's not here, but she left a ote on the table sang 'that's lovely - go ahead! :)'_**

**_Oh. If you say our names, we appear. We also disappear when we get bored... We're MAGIC!_**

**_..._**

**_Have you seen Eggy?_**

* * *

**TheBlackWolfHuntsAlone**

**Me: Greetings from a citizen of Australia and Perth.**  
**Perth: *Huff***  
**Me: Shes pissed with you, you missed her birthday, she turned 156.**  
**Perth: You didn't even say happy birthday big brother.**  
**Me: Tsk terrible brother I have 3 annoying older brothers (Kinda like you're brothers in fact practicly the same) and they still say happy birthday to me even if they give me birthday punches, anyway back to the subject and say happy birthday to you're little sis.**  
**Perth: No its okay, he obviously doesn't care as much about his Australian colonies as much as his ex-colonies. We still have the union jack on our flag even.**  
**Me: *Face palm* Did my french side take over the brittish and greek side last night again and hang out with you?**  
**Perth: *Nodds***  
**Me: England do you have any possible soloution to keep my french side at bay. honestly it was back in the french revolution how the hell does it beat down my british side.**  
**Perth: Honestly I dont know.**  
**Me: Oh well we've drabbled long enough now see ya England**  
**Perth: Bye Big Bro**

**_Hella Perth, hella person from Australia! That's a long way away. I posted a letter there this morning. It costed me £1.28._**

**_He's GONE! *cries* He's missing everyone's birthdays right now, 'cause nobody can find him! But nobody CARES!_**

**_Happy birthday, thoughs!_**

**_Um.. Getting rid of Frenchies... Pay them with roses, or nice wine, or tell them to mind their own beeswax._**

* * *

**Warnergirls2000**

**Good Day everyone! (Blinks at everyone suddenly talking and blushes a bit) Um...uhhh..hehehe...I think I'll pass on that Wales...(averts eyes and coughs)**

**Me and dark magic don't mix well...(laughs a bit and scratches her head) bad memories... Er anyways...Yeah I'd love to come visit you all. But I'm pretty poor and this trip mom went on was a gift from other members of her family. (smiles softly) So I probably won't be going anytime soon. Still thanks. You all are really nice. (sees the bunny and jumps a bit)**

**Oh hello there! I guess I can see you...not too well, but I can see...a floating green rabbit?...oh..sorry your flying...hi there! And yes, I am female. Last I checked anyways.**

**I would say I'm doing well, but I've gotten pretty sick the last few weeks. I hope someone didn't curse me or whatever I keep getting sick for no reason. It's very annoying. I was curious.**

**England what's your favorite fairy tale? I'm quite interested in mythology and Fairy Tales so I was wondering what your favorite one was. I myself am fond of The Snow Queen and The Tale of the Six Swans. Both Fairy Tales are not widely known but have great storylines and characters. Both are strong female main characters too hehe...I hope to be like that someday. I guess I've got that American drive to be a hero or at least strong for those I love. hehe**

**Anyways...ugh...head feeling dizzy again..**

**I hope things are going well with you all and I hope to speak with everyone again soon. Thank you for taking the time to talk to me.**

**And wow England, with all of that going on, I'm surprised your still sane. ...well mostly...(Couldn't help it! I like to tease)**

**I hope you reply soon. You might see more of me since America and Canada aren't doing their blog much anymore. Though I saw they had a website now.. (raises eyebrow)... Er yeah, I'm gonna go lie down now...(cough) if you have a spell or something to get over being sick faster I'd really like to know it.**  
**Goodbye everyone for now!**

**_If you're feeling sickey, put vasaline on your nose! That's what Eire does to me!_**

**_Scotty says you shouldn't accept anything from Wales. Even if he's being nice._**

**_:) Love you too! Bunny's gone looking for Eggy, but she logged me into this so I could do something... _**

**_I'm kinda bored... *pout*_**

**_Fairy Tale? Er... He allways tells me the one about The Burried Moon, which is kinda sad... Wales says brewery of eggshells, which is really strange, and Scotland likes one about the daught of the kig under-water or somthing like that... Eire doesn't tell me stories very often. :( I like stories!_**

**_You-sa welcome! And buh-bye!_**

* * *

**Ethraen Ermanil**

**UK family,**  
**I guess it's because you guys are older that you have forgotten how to behave like civilized family members? Or is this bickering just an expression of familial love? I know New York-niichan and Texas-niichan are kind of like that. They act like they don't hate each other, but when push comes to shove they band together and act like brothers.**  
**I'll take some of your cooking sure! Can I get some from Wales, Scotland and Ireland too? I don't have much in the way of English cooking over here. Although, No scones. I'm not too much of fan of scones...**  
**As to what a psychopath is... Hmm, well I guess a good example is 2P America. He's a psychopath. 2P Iggy is just plain crazy.**  
**Oh, England, I have a question for you. And I DO NOT mean to call you it, or have ur siblings call you it, so you don't have show them this part... if you can help it... But what would you do if I called you a lady? Or played 'Dude looks like a lady' while you were walking to a meeting at dad's place?**  
**Ja ne! Alex (WA)**  
**P.S. Please don't hurt me! I mean no harm...**

**_Hello. It's just me, today. :) Eggy's GONE, and the others are busy doing weird things._**

**_I dunno... I want them to be nice... It makes me cry when they fight.:(_**

**_I'll let them know! I'm giving out Champ, if you want any. He'll probably make you Yorkshire Puddings, or Cornish Pasties, then. I like pasties. They have 'tatoes in. I like ALL 'tatoes._**

**_*shiver* They're SCARY. Wales is scary too, though... _**

**_What is Eggy was stolen by them?! *cries*_**

**_Oh, Miss Croatia does that to him all the time. He his her, then goes home and makes scones._**

* * *

**_I hope that was okay..._**

**_I did good, right?_**

**_I want Eggy home... My foot still hurts, and now the rest too, because Welshie was nasty and nobody else will make it better._**

**_Eggy always makes it better..._**

**_..._**

**_..._**

**_:(_**

* * *

_(the author ays don't ask. Please don't ask. This now has a very vague plot going on, as said above, which could turn one of two ways... Is this alright for now? The brothers wil be invading for a while. Mostly North, although all of them will be around. And if anyone wants to know where England's gone... Give me a shout, and I'll recruit you to help out)_


	14. Chapter 14 - Where's Iggy?

_((Okay, so this is about o get a bit odd. Can you all please check your inboxes BEFORE snding i a message, please - I have a game I'm playng here, and some of you [not saying who] are being required to play. A Minor Sonata, that's fine, although there aren't any ths time - everything's about to get a little crazy and odd, though. Jus a warnng to you all.  
((Thanks, and this could be a little while as I'm now on three deadlines  
((Oh, and we havenote from Minty, too.))_

_(New character)_

* * *

**_Hi again! I'm gonna be REALLY quick, because Scotty's taking me out to the fireworks this evening, but something scary happened!_**

**_I was fixing the Guy for this evening, when the doorbell rang..._**

**_Oh, wait. I should explain, right?_**

**_A Guy is an effergy of Guy Fawlkes - he tried to blow up Eggy and Scotty and Welshie's king a few hundred yars ago. So, we burn him on a bonfire a few thousand times over every 5th November - the day he was going to bolow up the king. I hate religious wars... :( :( :(_**

**_So, the doorbell rang, but no-one was there! And ten I turned around, and the word 'brother' was painted in blood on the wall._**

**_*cries*_**

**_I ranged everyone else, and theys said that they had words too - Scotty had 'your', Welshie had 'price' and Eire had 'nations'._**

**_Some guy rang to say he had the word 'will', Australia said he had 'again'... :(_**

**_So we're piecing it all together right now, but still have a lot of wordses missing - if you see any, let me know!_**

**_Anyway, I need to be going..._**

**_..._**

**_I don't even like fireworks - they're too LOUD. But very pretty. Like Belgium!_**

**_Um... Sorry, I don't have time to do comments right now..._**

**_Maybe Eggy will be back to do them soon!_**

**_..._**

**_Because he still hasn't come home, and no-one's seen him... :(_**

* * *

Meanwhile...

_It's so dark here... Is this really where he went? O.o_

_But, his signal's from here, so I guess so! _

_Britain! _

_England! _

_Iggy!_

_United Kigdomof Great Britain and Northern Ireland!_

_..._

_It's Flyng Mint Bunny; where ARE you?!_

_..._

_Oh, well. LIGHT!_

_*performs Minty Magic*_

_..._

_(Hello, Flora...)_

_*Scream*_


	15. Chapter 15 - message from beyond

_((the author says, here is how this will work: There are three sections of 'plot'. Fist is the first one, then comments from 13. Then, under heading '*time skip*' (use CTRL F to skip replied, is the second piece. Following comments/answers are plot related [done by ballot and timing], but sumerised and the final part done under '*another time skip*. Got it?_

_((EDIT: Added in a message I forgot at the bottom. Oops. -_-'))_

_**It's North again, because the others are jerks and don't care about Eggy, other than annoying him. :( And they kicked me out, so I went to see Romania, but he dan't have internet. Bu we're at Norway's, and he DOES have internet. So... Yeah!**_

_**We're talking about Eggy... :( Some of the other Europeans got messages like mine, so we're trying to make sense of them! No luck yet, though... :( :(**_

_**Any information is greatfully recieved!**_

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**kitty: OH WUT!? IGGY GOT LOST!? hesprobablyhavingsexytimewit hamerica...hehehehe I SHALL HELP YOU FIND IGGY! FDYDDJOMSSJHUCHWGN THE BARRELS! they did this... stupid barrels...**

_**Hi miss! Thanks! If you come over here, then... We can work together!**_

_**Go team Eggy rescuers!**_

_**What's-a-wrong with the barrels?**_

* * *

**IntraSule**

**Oh, thank you for the heads-up on England's absence, Northern Ireland! Well, when he comes back, can you pass my message onto him? In the meantime...**

**Hello, little cutie! It's nice talking to ya! *gives an apple pie* How have you been?**

**Ha ha ha, I see, I knew he'd enjoy the date; who can resist those American charms? (Well, maybe the Canadians...)**

**Wale's daughter went missing? How? When? Why? Did he really have a daughter all this time?! By who?**

**Yeah, that was my attempt at being humorous, but I think that maybe only England would get it... *gives North another apple pie***

**Even though you're old by human standards, by nation standards, you're still young and a bit naive, so going to school for your lessons seems right for you. Study really hard, dear, so you can lead your citizens' children to a brighter educational future! ((This public service announcement brought to you by Colgate toothpaste. :P))**

**What's "trickle-treating"? Wait, do you mean "trick-or-treating?" Did you mispronounce it? Did you really just have a cute moment? That's so sweet! X3**

***a little frightened over world's safety* Why would Eire go target practicing? O_o**

**Don't worry about England, dear; he's a pirate, a sorcerer, and a skilled fencer. He might not look it, but he's pretty strong. Like Captain Hook! Or Peter Pan!**

**Champ? Sounds delish! I'd love some! :D It kinda sounds like this casserole I had oer the summer; it was made with mashed potatoes, peas, and ground beef, and was ultra-delicious! If only I can remember the name! Did that come from your coountry, too?**

**U-um, well, the uniforms aren't exactly "bad", but they're inappropiate because... *doesn't want to shatter a child's innocence* Well... Oh, look, a bunny! *gives North a bunny***

**Aw, sweetheart! Iceland's always pretty! Wait, how does a child hurt himself a lot? Er, nevermind...**

**You know, North, you have got to be one of the sweetest and cutest kids I've ever had the pleasure of talking to! *gives North another bunny and a slice of cake* Now you hide those bunny in a conspicuous place so that your brother doesn't take them away, okay? And take good care of them! Don't forget to brush your teeth and exercise when you're done gorging on those sweets!**

**Bye, little love!**

_**Wow! A LOOOONG one!**_

_**I'll try my best, miss!**_

_**I'm good thank you. The pie was realy nice! We ate it during our meeting that I'm sitting in but ignoring unless asked questions, and doing this on my phone and under the desk!  
Well... I'm kinda scared by all the blood, and I cut my fingers, but I'm otherwise good!**_

_**Canadians... No Canadia... Oh! Canada! Um... Surely they're brothers? Kissing your brother on the lips is icky. I think America's funny! When we find Eggy, they should go on more dates.**_

_**I meant one of the Welshie girls... All people who live in Wales are Welshie's children, like Chinese people are Miss China's!**_

_**Oh. Shall I lagh and pretend I found it funny? That's what I have to do when Scotty makes jokes. And that's a LOT of pie... Can I save this one for dinner?**_

_**Okay. But I'm not in school now - Eire had 'family emergancy' papers, so I don't go back until Eggy's back! But I'll be good and do all the work they gave me! Maybe Miss Belgium will help me...  
I use Colgate toothpaste! The one with little cubes in it!**_

_**Is that what yo're supposed to say?... Where people give you sweeties, because you're dressed up and ask nicely. Then yeah! I like sweeties, but I'm not supposed to eat them!**_

_**... I danno. He didn't tell me... But he's been being nicer to the others recently, so he's not going crazy again... Right? *little worried now, too***_

_**I guess... Okay! I won't worry, except that Norway thinks we should! So, Romania's now panicing! Which is funny. *giggle***_

_**Ground... You mean micey meat! Yeah! Well, sorta. If it's lamb or mutton it's shepard's pie, cow is cottage! But it came about after we all got unified, and before Eire split... I wasn't around then! I think you mean mashied ''tatoes ontop, with mice meat and veggies underneath.**_

_**What...? Thank you! I'll call him Coinín!**__ (__(A.N. Literally, rabbit))_

**_Really? Wow. An they get the pretty coloured lights lots and lots... But it must be sad being dark for half of the year... :( Maybe Iceland needs a hug!  
I tend to hurt myself by mistake... I fall down the staris, catch my fingers on the 'tatoe masher, trap my fingers in the door, drop things on my feets..._**

**_Thank you! I'll run all the way to... Um... I'm in Oslo, so Beijing! Then, I'll run all the way to Calais and take the ferry home! Then I can eat the sweeties, and I'll hide the rabbits... Um... Oh! In the forest! Eggy has a rabbit hutch, and said I could use it, as long as Eire didn't find it, and I denied it was his!_**

**_Bye miss!_**

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**Yo! I wanna help out too! Yeah... tell north I'm sorry but I don't know where he is... I hope Iggy's fine... I was gonna ask him if we can add extra sugar to the scones... Hey did Iggy's other friends go look for him too? Like the unicorn? That's it for today. See you guys later!**

_**Hello!**_

_**Great! I'll add you to the list, too! And I danno. I can't see his friends, so...**_

_***speaks to Norway***_

_**Norway says they've all gone! Because they're all in different and wrong places!**_

* * *

**FlyingLikeAButterfly**

**Hello!  
I didn't mention it last time but the last school day for the year 12's was muck up day for them. The year 7's hosted a morning breakfast for them but later in the day in the girls toilet's they put fish oil and fish all over the toilets, it was horrible and my class had PE and we had to change, luckily we got change in the stadium. The principle and some others had to clean it up. The next day they had water guns filled with tomato sauce, fish oil, urine and a mixes of them. The year 12's were at the oval which was good for us but I heard the year 8's got sprayed.  
Why are so many nations boy's?  
Who has the best cooking out of the UK brothers'?  
Bye :D**

_**That doesn't sound very nice. :(  
I'm not**** sure**** why there's lots of boys... I think... Um... Eire said something about lots of the old girl nations getting killed off again and again until they turned into boys. Which is really sad... :( Doesn't happen any more, though! :)** ((the author says my idea again, but it would make sense. Women wer very much lesser in most of history, so a female nation would be seen as a lesser nation... This would not happen all places with a female represenative - and where the female had a male guardian even less so - but in lots. Also, hence why Hungary thought she was a boy... You're probably bored now, but I can go through all the girls some other time!))  
**We all think our own cookig is good, but nobody outside the family agree. Most not-UK/Ireland people eat Eggy's food, though.**_

_**BYE!**_

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl**

**Hm? Oh, hey, N.I! You don't know where big brother is, either? He was supposed to come over to my place for tea, but he never showed. I was going to call people soon. I wasn't that worried, he is a country and things do pop up.**

**Meh, she's not really the hugging type, N.I. She just wants everyone except her brother to leave her alone. And actually, right now, she's out with friends.**

**He isn't? Good. He scares me.**

**N.I, maybe we should start getting worried now. Did you call the counties? If you don't have their numbers, I do. We'll find nii-chan, don't worry, ok?**

**Love,**

**London (Victoria Kirkland)**

_**Hello London! Mummy was complaining about you earlier. Not sure why, though... *confused***_

_**Not for this long, though... Meetings are so BORING!**_

_**Um... Okay. Can I have a hug? Hope she had fun!**_

_**Yep. I dan't know were Welshie is, but I'm far, far away!**_

_**I dan't have the numbers, but I told some of them with blogs! And, Romania rang everyone else whe he came over and picked me up. :)**_

_**I'll try no to, but I'm still kinda scared... At least Norway smells o' magic, and Sweden's right next door, and Denmark's not very far away.**_

* * *

**Warnergirls2000**

**Thanks for the last reply and be careful! Something is not right if England has been missing for that long. I want to help but my magic is rather limited to what I can and cannot do without seriously consequences. I pray you will find him in good health. But if you need of any magical assistance I will do what I can. Also those words sound disturbing. Maybe if I meditate for a while I can help you all. Keep looking, but be careful! For some reason this makes me feel very uneasy. I hope you find him soon. And once again. If you need any help. Let me know.**

_**Hello, and thanking you. :) I'l let you know, 'cause he's STILL missing... The others have to be concerned by now... but the're not... Maybe they did it!**_

_**...**_

_**Oh, we thought of that, and Norway thinks not. Neither does Romania.**_

* * *

**TheBlackWolfHuntsAlone**

**Me: Hello again  
****Perth: Thanks other big brother, it's a lovely letter.  
Me: Well I'm glad you're happy, but I can't just pay myself to walk away. How the hell would that work? And Why does no one care that England's missing? I care.  
Perth: And so do I, but you only care because you got family there, I care because he is family. Anyway which one of you are telling Australia Big brother Iggy's missing because I'm not, I want to live to be 157 and look 14 ya know. Oh and big sister WA says hi.  
Me: Why do you say big sister and big brother all the time.  
****Perth: I'm related to a lot of people, many of whom are big brothers and sisters who probaly don't remember me. I doubt Big Brother Englands brother remember who I am Right? So I say that in front so they know the family relation and it's not awkward.  
****Me: Okay were starting to drabble that means it's bye bye time. So See ya.  
Perth: Bye, come and vist sometime.**

_**You're welcome!  
I think the other REAL countries are slightly concerned, just not my other brothers... *sigh* Why can't they pretend to be nice...?**_

_**Say hi to her for me... I did it! By email! Then deleted the account before he could reply!**_

_**I'll come visit when Scotty stops blocking my visa appliations! I can't get out of Europe at the minute. *pout***_

_**BYE!**_

* * *

**hi :)  
I didn't ask for a history lesson...I just wanted to know what Lady Jane means, I got it after the eighth word you said (wrote).  
It was a better story :) but still I wonder which kind of stories you used to tell Alferd when he was young..probably a boring historical story...  
Oh ya forgive me that my language is normal and don't have capitals like your stupid language!  
Yay! Sure Wales let's go and 'see' him together :) we can even 'play' a little with him! yes! it's the time for my revenge!  
wait a minute.. 'him' is 'her'? *Burst out laughing* oh well Flying Mint Bunny you should blame only yourself...I met you only once and I must say that my Flying Licorice Bunny looks a lot more feminine than you, and he is a BOY.. hahah**

**America asked you to dinner?! *sparkling eyes* I must tell it to Hungary!**  
**Have fun in your date- ahem..dinner, yes I absolutely wanted to say dinner! a simple dinner that it!**  
**HAVE FUN :)**

_**Sorry I forgot... :( I was hiding... Hug make it better?**_

_**Um... I'm not sure, 'cause Alfred's younger than me... I'll let the others to tell you some if you remind me! But there was one about King Alfred the Great who was on the run from invaders. He stayed at he house of an old lady, who asked him to watch what she was cooking while she ent out. He didn't, and it burnt! So he got old off by a random old lady!**_

_**It's okay... I have to learn FOUR languages, because Irish Gaellic isn't an official language, but I speak it... I have to learn all or oficial languages (Scotts Gaellic, Welsh English), and I'm supposed to learn British Sign... It's REALLY hard and I dan't like it and I get all confused!**_

_**Um... Going places with Wales is BAD, but he's probably in Cardiff.**_

_**I think we all get confused... But I can't see Minty. I can HEAR her sometimes, but not see her.**_

_**America didn't ask me! But okay!**_

_**BYE MISS!**_

* * *

**Greece's kitty**

**...i dont even kn- MINTY! RUN**

_Flying Mint Bunny is not available right now so, please leave a message after the beep. *BEEP*_

* * *

**Warnergirls2000**

**Thanks for the last reply and be careful! Something is not right if England has been missing for that long. I want to help but my magic is rather limited to what I can and cannot do without seriously consequences. I pray you will find him in good health. But if you need of any magical assistance I will do what I can. Also those words sound disturbing. Maybe if I meditate for a while I can help you all. Keep looking, but be careful! For some reason this makes me feel very uneasy. I hope you find him soon. And once again. If you need any help. Let me know.**

_**I KNOW that. I'm not completely stupid all of tha time. I want him to come home... :( Scotty doesn't.**_

_**Very distrub-el-ing!**_

_**Um... I'll add you to the list!**_

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl**

**Hey, N.I.**  
** I read your post for November fifth. **

**I'm coming over there, I've got a gun. Nobody messes with MY big brother. Toni lent me one, she has WAY too many.**

**I'm going to help you, okay? He's my brother, too. Don't tell me I'm too young *cough* SCOTTY *cough* because I'm old enough. **

**I'll be there in an hour, okay? Okay, good.**

**Here to kick ** and save my brother,**

**London (Victoria Kirkland)**

**_Hi again London!_**

**_I dan't want to know why she has lots of guns... :( He should have been at your place AGES ago._**

**_You're older than me! You're ROMAN! So, I won't say anything._**

**_Okay! Just remember I'm in Oslo. Because if you turn up to Belfast, you've gone wrong._**

* * *

******A Minor Sonata **

**I barely know what going on, and I'm freaking out already. O - O Blood? Not red food coloring? Ketchup?**  
**I felt like screaming- but probably more like squirming uncomfortably.**

_(the author apologises for not being clear, but this SHOULD answer your question better.)_

_**It smelt like blood, and I weren't licking it!**_

_**I did that. Well, screaming. Not squirming. NOW I'm squirming, because that's fun! But a little weird... And Norway noticed I'm not paying attention. Oopsie. ^^'**_

* * *

*time skip*

**_So... Norway told me off for using the phone, and Romania gave me a cookie! I like cookies... _**

**_But so, we still haven't workeded anything out. :( Norway thinks something fishie's goin' on, but we're not sure what. So..._**

**_Oh! More letters! I'll do them now I'm ALLOWED to, and have a computer. Lalalalala..._**

* * *

**Ayamari Uta**

**That Inglaterra. :I Que extraño(How weird)! I found something what seems like sangre (blood). It said, "a piece of".**

**I wonder what that means- Ay, mi paella!**

**-Spain**

_**Thanking you, Spain! I'll write all these down, then call Romania! And HE can get Norway! And we'll start another meeting, and I'll pretend to pay attention this time!**_

* * *

**Ethraen Ermanil**

**It feels weird calling you North... can I call you N. Ireland? Or NIre?**

I'm not sure if dad will let me leave, but I got this really weird and cryptic-like message on my wall while I was gone. I know it's not one of my siblings or my dad because it specifically had Iggy's name on the note. He said to relay this to you...

'met on time'.

I'm not sure what that means! But... I don't know what to do...

~Alex (WA)

_**Hella Washington!**_

_**Well, you can call me N. Ireland or Northern Ireland if you want... Or N.I.! I just thought you'd get annoyed with typing out all the letters in my name!**_

_**O.o I'll add it to the list-ey thingey.**_

_**I don't think any of us know what to do... :(**_

* * *

**TheBlackWolfHuntsAlone**

**Perth : Hey North, why is 42 wallaby way Sydney written on my door in blood? Is this some sick racist joke on me because you should send it to Sydney.**  
**Me : Dirty Underware was on my door in blood too.**  
**Perth : What the Hell?**  
**Me : I know. Stupid prankers.**

_***scribbling on the table***_

_**Thanks Perth and Wolfie! I'm sorry it's creepy... But not my fault! Promise!**_

_**How is that racist? O.o?**_

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**You just burn a doll of him? ...It sound kind of stupid..**  
**Oh..don't cry! Are you sure that's blood? It can be a paint or.. a tomato sauce? Anyway don't worry! The guy who did it is just plain stupid! I mean writing things with blood (or tomato sauce)? It's too banal!**  
**Like Belgium? Do I sense love?**  
**Anyway I want-**  
***CRASH***  
**What was that!? *Boom* *Boom* *Boom***  
***BOOM***  
**AAAAhhhh! **

**11/06**

**A letter to North-**  
**Dear north, I'm sorry about cutting my comment in the middle. I just that... Anyway I'm now in Australia, taking a vacation far away from the UK. I REALLY need it after that thing happend... I GOT A LETTER! Well it was more like a not.. but still, I got somthing in my LETTER BOX! DON'T GIVE ME THAT LOOK (I know you are doing it) I'm not crazy- After all I'm not England! I'm sorry...That was rude of me. Anyway the problam with me getting a note in my letter box is that I simply .HAVE. .BOX! Oh yes I do have that strange slot in my door but not an actuall letter box! Anyway, you would freak out as well if you had heard strange noises from outside to see a letter box In your garden! So yes, I'm blaming you! Just because I don't have anyone else to blame (after all England is missing) AND DON'T CRY! Hopefully we WON'T stay in touch!**  
**~BB~**  
**P.S- Oh I forgot there was somthing written on that not. I was ' bring a' I don't see why somone will go through al the troubls of bringing a letter box to someone garde just for this lame note..**

_**Well, burning at the stake was the appropriate punishment. And you can't realy burn actual him multiple times.**_

_**Maybe... Smelted like blood. *sniffle***_

_***blush* Um... Mayyyyybe...**_

_**Are you alright miss?!**_

_**Eggy's no crazy. He's special! Like Italy and me! That's what Eire says when he's being nice!**_

_**B-but... I didn't do it! *cries***_

_**...**_

_**...**_

_***sniffles and adds to list***_

* * *

**Alfred and Mattie**

**Okay, so me and Mattie are SERIOUSLY freaking out. DX And like, threats and **. And it said to tell you, so we are. DX And Mattie licked it- (Canada: NO. Y-You thought it was ketchup!) I licked it, and it totally was blood dude! Nasty!**

_**Not good! Um... I believe Mr Canada Not America! Um... Oh! Found what they said on the other side!**_

_**... ROMANIA! NORWAY!**_

_**...**_

* * *

*another time skip*

**_We have the message! With everyone's pieces, we made it all together! :)_**

**_But it's scary and nasty and creepy and... *cries*_**

_'Hello nations,_

_If you ever want to see your brother/friend/aquaintence alive, then you mst bring a piece of dirty underwear from all nations, by Saturday, to 42 wallaby way Sydney. America must bring them. Alone._

_If my demands are not met, then England. Will. Die._

_And that will only be the begining.'_

* * *

_((A.N. I am SO sorry about how long this took but 'life' [read: school] got in the way. Next one MIGHT be up before the underwear deadline, or maybe not... No promises, but I'll try._

_((Sweet dreams and biscuits!))_


	16. Post 16 - St Andrew's Day

_((A.N. I sorta had to do something today, so Scotland's doing the start, then North will finish off... In a few posts, England will be back!))_

**Hello, lassies and laddies. It's Scotland.**

**Happy Saint Andrew's Day. *cricks neck***

**Now my duties are over, I'm off to get drunk. See you whenever.**

***Door slams***

* * *

_**Hi! It's North Again!**_

_**We told America, so he's going to go rescue Eggy! Because he's a REAL HERO!**_

_**Oopsie. Eggy will tell me off for that. Never mind...**_

_**Just hope he's okay...**_

_**Romania's taking me to see Miss Belgium tomorrow, and said he'd make sure Netherlands stayed away! *happy blush***_

_**So... Not many messages! ONWARDS!**_

* * *

**The-Goddamn-Iron-Girl**

**N.I, **  
**What? Why? It couldn't possibly be the avalanche- nope. Nothing at all. I'm innocent. **  
**Yes, I know, and I'm worried now. **  
**Yes, you can have a hug! *hugs***  
**If you need someone's number, just ask and I'll text it to you. **  
**Norway? He's a good guy. If you see Oslo, tell her I said hi. **  
**Toni: DID SOMEONE SAY NORWAY?! **  
**Calm down. He's not here.**  
**Toni: I'M LUCKY TODAY! Praise...someone! I look like CRAP.**  
**All right, cool it little miss fangirl. **  
**Toni: Two words. Matt. Smith. Nuf said.**  
***blushes* ...no. Uh, call us if you need help, N.I. We're worried, too. **  
**Love, **  
**Victoria Kirkland (London) and the AWESOME Toni Stark- I'm back, baby!**

_**Hello miss!**_

_**Huh...? I believe you! ^-^**_

_**Me's worried to... :( Hope he's okay.**_

_**Thanking you! *hugs back***_

_**... I don't have your number... Oh! I'll ask Belfast! One minute... Okay! I will.**_

_**I think she's avoiding us, but I have to say thanks as I stayed in her house, so I'll go find her for you. *serious mission face***_

_**Hello Toni. You 'kayyyy?**_

_**Girls are weird. ...**_

_**Hum... I will! I have your number now! But America's going to sort it out, so everything will be good! Because he's a hero, and heros save the day!**_

_**Um... On another point... *blushes* Never mind! It's kinda embarrassing. ^-^'**_

* * *

**Qualeshia Marshall**

**Hello there Britain...if you aren't Britain then hello to you too. **  
***smiles and waves happily***

_**Hello miss!**_

_**Unfortunatly he's not here... But 'Merica's going to find him!**_

_***waves back***_

* * *

_(this is a psychic message to America curtosey of Flying Mint Bunnies United)_

_America! Whatever you do, don't give into him!_

_Please! Don't give in! But HELP!_


	17. Post 17 - it went how?

_((A.N. As to how you have 3 updates in a school week, I'm procastinating... So, yeah. And this falls under 'vaguely useful procastination'/_

_((And Britain/England is back next time!))_

**_America's back from Australia, but there was no-one there... :( So he left the stuff and came home... :(_**

**_I want my brother back._**

**_..._**

**_Although Welshie has trapped his home with death rays. Maybe he should stay away..._**

**_..._**

**_But I want him back... :(_**

**_..._**

**_Huh? Oh! Text!_**

**_*reads text*_**

**_:) :) :)_**

**_America says that Eggy's at his house! *happy dance*_**

**_So, England gets his blog back next time... _**

**_*carries on reading*_**

**_Oh... :( Apparently, he's mostly okay. :(_**

**_Which means he's not really okay okay. *sniffle*_**

**_But mostly means not dead and easy to fix! Which is better than dead or impossible to fix!_**

**_I'll do this, and then I'll go see Miss Belgium! *blush*_**

**_And leave it all to Eggy for a while, 'cause I'll have to go back to school once Eire realised Eggy's back._**

* * *

**kuroiyou63**

**Dude! Sorry I wasn't here earlier. Was very occupied with school. Iggy still ain't here? Man that sucks. 'speacially for you North or whoever is doing this now. I have nothing much on anything thou. Looks like Iggy'll be gone for awhile but it seems fine. Oh wait. Did you check the closet? or the basement? He might be there. Hey what will you do if Iggy was kidnapped by Dr. Who? and is now travelling different dimensions having the time of his life? Well I guess that's enough for today. See ya later!**

_**I dunno where he went, or whose took him, but he's with America! And America's the hero, so he'll look after him.**_

_**I want to get kidnapped by Doctor Who... *pout***____((the author thinks that now is appropriate to say that yes, getting kidnapped by The Doctor is somethng that a LOT of people in her country want.))_

**_Bye!_**

* * *

**Warnergirls2000**

**I hope America will be okay. Thanks for the update everyone. And that was a very odd message..and you were right quite disturbing I might add. I'm really worried about America and England now. I hope whoever did this will pay. No one should go around and kidnap nations!...anyway. Shouldn't there be some kind of backup in case America gets into some trouble...also you guys didn't go around and collect dirty underwear...did you?...cause...ew...Does anyone have any ideas who the heck is doing this? Though if we do find them I would like to deck the person for messing with them..and being generally gross... Anyway keep us updated.**

_**Mr America's good, and In-ge-land is with him! Which makes Eggy okay, because America won't let him not be okay.**_

_**Very disturbing... Um... Well, some nations DONATED the underwear. France was REALLY happy to dnate underwear, and offered to help collect. I'm not too sure why Norway hit him for it... **_

_**And then there was a meeting on Friday, where Romania an Norway used magic to get everyone else's!**_

_**America might know, or Eggy, but we don't know yet. Hopefully, now they have what they want, they'll go away and leave us alone!**_

* * *

**BlackBloodOnWhiteSnow**

**I know I said that I wouldn't keep in touch, but...**

*giggle*

*giggle*  
*gigg- burst out laughing*  
IT'S JUST TOO HILARIOUS!  
I mean messages in blood, letters box and now that... *snicker* DO IT AMERICA! Give that strange person everything he wants!  
*reading the message again* You know what? I think I found my soulmate!  
Dirty underwear *snicker* from all nations, that means you too North! And Japan as well!  
Wait...Japan...NO WAY! YOU CAN"T DO IT AMERICA! LET ENGLAND DIE! HE DOESN'T WORTH IT!  
And North sweetie, of course you and England are special :) It's just that England id special in a diffrent way... Like the type of special people that end up in a mental hospital...  
Oh, I think I hurt people who were in a mental hospital by comparing them to England...

_**HELLO AGAIN! :)**_

_**Um... Okay? Mr America did it. Do you... Want to kiss someone? *confused***_

_**Yep! I gave it my green boxers with pink stripes! I didn't like them anyway.**_

_**Um... Romania may-have-kinda used a special spell to get Japan's... *nervous laugh* He called it 'Let Italy get too close, and grab them whilst he's distracted'.**_

**_But... Why would Eggy be in a mental hospital? He's the only one of my brothers who is nice to me... :(_**


	18. Post 18 - I kinda lost the messages

_((The authoress apologises profusely, but she seems to have mislaid the questions. If anyone can remember them. And she's completely left this too long... So, please enjoy this highly suggestive new chapter. On another note, they now have their own, shared, facebook page!))_

England

_**N. Ireland**_

**Scotland**

**_Wales_**

_Rep. of Ireland_

_Minty Bunny_

* * *

My apologies for takin so long. There has been rather a lot of trouble in London, as well as further affield. Like in Northern Ireland.

_**Not MY fault! Promise! He was too busy snogging Ameri!**_

I was not-

**None of them believe you.**

I was not bloody snogging America!

**_Kissi-ing, then!_**

_You cannot hide from the truth, only seek to conceal it._

Since when did you get so damned philosophical?!

_**Eire's been taking a philosophy course!**_

Blast.

**_Why's that a problem? O.o_**

**Your other brother's just whining. Now get your skinny ass back over here.**

_**Um...**_

_**Good afternoon...**_

Where is my rabbit?

**_You won't be seeing-_**

_ALBION! HELP!_

No a-bloody-gain. North's incharge.

**WHAT?!**

**_Well... Okay! I like potatoes and peppers and the colour green and my people are violently protesting over not flying the Union Flag, but then when we fly the Union Flag, the OTHERS protest, so they just spend all the time blowing each other up. :( Which is nasty, and I just want the fighting to stop. Hum._**

_Thanks, Albi._

You're welcome... Now where were we...

**_But it was only you? O.o_**

It's a... Stop making that face!

**_Sowwy._**

**_You'd better be... ;)_**

**_*gulp* Scotty, you know how you're the bestest eldest brother in the whole wide world?_**

**Not doing it.**

_**Eire...**_

_No._

_**Eggy... You know how your the best brother that's left, who doesn't want to kill me?**_

Down the stairs, third door on the left. As I was saying, it seems that some troll friend of Minty's with a rather disturbing underwear fettish decided to hold me hostage, in return for underwear... Regardless, I escaped the ice prison, and am now home after spending some time in America, then touring the Commonwealth... Although I think I missed something. ... And if he is reading this, I did NOT appreciate the 'gift', git.

_It was... Never mind. But yes! Trolly is... A very old aquaintence of mine - he was kicked out of Norway a few years ago. :) But everyone's safe now. And Britain and America can go back to doing dirty things behind closed doors, which everyone knows we're recording anyway!_

Quite... You're all... They left. What a stroke a good luck. I'll go get some tea...

_That's not a good idea._

...

SCOTLAND! Care to explain why there's treacle in my hair?!


	19. Chapter 19 - Comic Relief

_ ((Hello again. I need to get this up in 10, so S. is Scotland, E. England, W. Wales, N. Northern Ireland and I. Repuli of Ireland, 'kay? Double brackets means not in the same room. In asterixes are movements. This is ow I write it at school - I should tidy up, but ealy do no have time, and it is date specific. See you all in another three months? ^^' Onwards!))_

S.  
Oi, Bror! Open up!

E.  
No way.

N.  
Brother…

E.  
No.

I.  
Whatever. Let's go 'borrow' his account again. It's been a while.

N.  
YEAH!

M.  
Maybe I should… Nope. Not happening.

*time skip*

I.  
And here are the messages…

* * *

**_UK bros,_**

**_Iggy is safe now, right? Dad got to play the hero? He must have liked that. _**

**_Are you going to throw a party upon Iggy's return? maybe a surprise party? Oh! If Iggy is back how was it being kidnapped? I figure being kidnapped is never fun, but it could have been tolerable or downright torture... I'm just curious._**

**_I guess I could ask what your guys' favorite food is. I'm going to Iggy's is scones, but I could be wrong with that.I have a feeling I asked this question already... hmmm, ok, choice of drinks, and is Iggy the only one who can't hols his liquor?_**

**_buh bye,_**  
**_Alex (WA)_**

N.  
Eggy's hiding in his room, but he's all fine! And… he was visiting whatever-America-now-is recently! I think he liked it…  
I like parties!

I.  
Why would we throw a party?

W.  
So we could get all of his little friends. ;)

N.  
He won't tell us about it.

((E.  
Ah-ha! I can do this without coming out…  
I do not remember much of it – I spent most of the time unconscious and in cased in ice. I have strange marks on my arms, but that's all.

And, actually, I prefer carrot. Don't you dare - tell anyone.))

N.  
I like potatoes! Any potatoes! But especially smash-ied! Or fried!

But not frog!

S.  
Deep fried anything.

I.  
... I do not have a favourite.

N.  
He likes 'tates, too! And, irish stew. Which has 'taties in.

I.  
… When I get my hands on you…

N.  
Eep. Welshie, normal food, please!

W.  
Out of normal foods… Bara lawr.

N.  
What'sa licur?

I.  
You know when we all go out to the pub…

N.  
no… Oh! When you all come to my place with each other's clothes on? Or, no clothes. Or, women's clothes? And then all spend the morning cursing yourselves to hell, but repeat the next morning?

*Scoltand gags North*

S.  
Shut up!

N.  
*Bites*  
Sorry!

S.  
Little-

I.  
If you continue that…

S.  
Fine.

W.  
Now, North… We have some lessons, yes?

N.  
Coming Wales!

S.  
Get back here, you psycho!

I.  
*collects rifle*  
Here we go again.

* * *

_**Hello! Sorry for disappearing! I had end of term exams :(**_  
_**And I got needles, why must they hurt?!**_  
_**Anyways my friends finish school in the 10th and I finish on the 21st :(**_  
_**I'm having a concert this week! I'm really excited.**_  
_**England's been away for some time now hasn't he?**_  
_**I heard that Will and Kate had a baby! That's wonderful!**_  
_**I don't know why people say British cooking is bad, don't they know Jamie Oliver?**_  
_**What do you think of spiders? I was reading once and a spider was crawling on my hand and when I happened to look over, I got quite a fright.**_

N.  
We're sorry, too! They were busy getting 'drunk off their asses', Eggy was visiting 'Mercia, and I was locked in my room! :D ß 'Mercia taught me new faces!

W.  
needles only hurt when you stab out eyes with them.

N.  
We finished on 23rd a few years ago! And have fun!

S.  
*snort*  
We discussing the missing, or the 'visiting'?

N.  
Will have – won't it be fun! I can play with her/him, and watch her grow up, and make her potatoe soup!

((E.  
Don't bloody mention that moron. His food is nothing on mine, and a disgrace to the art of cuisine!  
And what of spiders?))

N.  
I like spiders! They all live in an old shoebox!

W.  
Crush their little bodies between your fingers.

I.  
They keep away the flies.

S.  
Wuss.

* * *

_**I know I said that I wouldn't keep in touch, but... **_

_***giggle***_

_***giggle***_  
_***gigg- burst out laughing***_  
_**IT'S JUST TOO HILARIOUS!**_  
_**I mean messages in blood, letters box and now that... *snicker* DO IT AMERICA! Give that strange person everything he wants!**_  
_***reading the message again* You know what? I think I found my soulmate! **_  
_**Dirty underwear *snicker* from all nations, that means you too North! And Japan as well!**_  
_**Wait...Japan...NO WAY! YOU CAN"T DO IT AMERICA! LET ENGLAND DIE! HE DOESN'T WORTH IT!**_  
_**And North sweetie, of course you and England are special :) It's just that England id special in a diffrent way... Like the type of special people that end up in a mental hospital...**_  
_**Oh, I think I hurt people who were in a mental hospital by comparing them to England...**_

S.  
He did it. All you have to do is ask Japan.

W.  
Shall the three of us get together over a cup of blood sometime?

N.  
It was easy – I don't like washing, and Scotty bought me some new ones! Francey-pants's were funny!

… I don't want to get locked up! That's bad! *cries*

((E.  
What do you think that for, git?))

I.  
Now look at what you did.

S.  
Go see Belgium, freak.

N.  
*cheers up* Going!

S.  
Now we can really mess things up… *evil laugh*

Im not

((E.  
I can safely assure you that America does NOT have a kangaroo. Although, he does keep a unicorn that I gave to him. *very proud*))

* * *

**_Hey Eyebrows!_**  
**_All six of us (The Author, his four split personalities and Prussia) have a dare for you! Do you accept?_**  
**_If so the dare is to... *Puffs out chest* KISS FRANCE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

I.  
You're asking my little brother to kiss my elder brother's ex? I think I like you.

W.  
*in Northern Ireland voice* Oh, Eggy!

E.  
What?

W.  
Go kiss France.

E.  
I'm getting engaged soon. Why the hell would I do that?

W.  
*cackles*

S.  
What was that?

E.  
Nothing! Don't you bloody dare come up here!

S.  
What's wrong? You agreed to wear it.

E.  
Not… THIS!

W.  
*cackles harder*

I.  
May we assume your fault?

W.  
You may. ;)

* * *

**_So Iggy's fine. And America's the hero again. Hoorah! Now I wonder if he actually just went to Canada's place... Hey you're there Iggy then yo! My mom still didn't make the scones... At least we won't die. soon... Ugh... peace._**

**_HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! IGGY! YOU WERE KISSING THE HERO?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**  
**_Dude you were not here for a lot o' months. My classmate got worried._**  
**_So! How'd your life go for a few months? Aside from uh... your activities with America? Hope ya didn't go overboard man... _**  
**_I'll ask you other questions the next time ya come. Cuz I can't be sure you'll even answer this in favor of goin' with Al._**  
**_So, see ya!_**

S.  
He did a lot more than kissing last week.

W.  
;)

((E.  
Well, forgive me for getting kidnapped.

I've cooked, visited America, filed paperwork. Filed more paperwork. Been to see America. Fought with France over politics. Fought with France. Went to some meetings. Visited the Commonwealth. Visited America. Dressed up for… Today… *winces*))

* * *

_**Cancer: WELCOME TO OUR POST OF IDIOCY.**_  
_**Capricorn: CaNcEr, CaN yOu LaY oFf ThE cApS lOcK?**_  
_**Cancer: I'LL LAY OFF THE DAMN CAPS LOCK IF YOU LAY OFF THAT GOGDAMN TYPING QUIRK!**_  
_**Capricorn: Fine...*took all of her willpower just to type normally***_  
_**Cancer: Good. Anyway, England, we're here to tell you that um...WHY THE HELL DO WE HAVE TO LIVE ON EARTH?!**_  
_**Capricorn: Lay off the caps lock, Cancer. NOW.**_  
_**Cancer: Fine...*looks behind her* Gemini's cussing out Virgo.**_  
_**Capricorn: The twins?**_  
_**Cancer: *nods* England, we'll see you later, we have to deal with 10 other dumbasses who specialize in idiocy.**_

S.  
This is new. Wales!

W.  
Let us have some fun…  
You live on earth because we trapped up here in the year 52BC, using an advanced technique including the sacrifice of eighteen men and a woman.

I.  
Welcome to the world. *rolls eyes*

* * *

**_HELLO IGGY What is your opinion on America I HAVE to know If you have not noticed USUK is my fave pairing also I am american so I do not like grammer (it is evil) But I am also scotish german irish welsh danish and swedish I do not lie before i go HELLO KITTY IS AWESOME ARU!_**

((E.  
… America is an interesting character.))

((N.  
Look up! He's going to propose! But SHHHH! Don't tell America!))

((E.  
SHUT UP!))

W.  
I eat Hello Kitty for breakfast.

* * *

*later that evening*

*North comes in*

N.  
I'M NACK! J J J :D

E. You mean back?

N.  
Yeah…  
WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!

W.  
;) I may have traded it for his entertainment show.

N.  
Go change – now!

E.  
I can't – Cameron saw, and thinks it is the most likely way to…

N.  
Well… You should get enough for it? *badly hidden laugh*

E.  
Belt up.

*night falls*

Voice-over  
Hello and welcome to this year's Comic Relief. To open the proceedings today, please welcome our nations themselves!

*S. comes out in licre. W. is wearing drag. N. is dressed up as a fairy. E. is the last to come out. He is wearing… A pale yellow bikini.*

E.  
Hurry up. It's bloody freezing.

N.  
And now, let's PARTY!

S.  
Until the wee hours of the morning…

W.  
No alcohol. ;)

N.  
Just semi-famous people making fools of themselves to raise money to help people!

E.  
How the hell did I end up in this…  
What the hell are you staring at? Get on with the show, gits!

N.  
*giggle*  
Until next time we feel bored enough to write something!


End file.
